Thread by @KayeSteinsapir

Eli’s birthday party was wonderful. He enjoyed every minute! It was a nice day for all. It wouldn’t have been possible without family and friends, including #TEAMMOLLY. My sister and sister-in-law did many things they knew I could not.

Since we built our house over a ago, it was the first time we’ve had a gathering, besides Molly’s shiva. I invited Eli’s small preschool class as the kids are together anyway. The adults have all been vaccinated. A glimpse of post-Covid normalcy!

Molly was with us. I’m learning that our loved ones on the other side use people on Earth, sometimes unknowingly, to deliver messages of their love. Through @MindsEye55 and @yenyen419, Molly sent a garbage truck for a surprise visit, balloons and sweets for the birthday boy.

Through my friend, Alyson, who I haven’t seen since I was Molly’s age, Molly sent a personalized travel mug (yellow, Molly’s favorite when she was younger, with Molly’s own writing). It arrived as Eli was opening his gifts. Someone walked up to me and said this one is for you.

When I thanked Alyson, she said her gift wasn’t supposed to arrive until Monday. I don’t think it was accidental that it showed up when I most needed it.

I couldn’t help but think of Molly’s fifth birthday. I’m a recovering perfectionist. I spent weeks creating a Pinterest-worthy under-the-sea themed party. I put thought into every detail because of my love for Molly. I also let my perfectionism get the best of me.

Molly’s birthday is in October. Because it’s the start of the school year, I would invite classmates from the precious and current years. When she turned 5, she started a new school, so we had new and old friends. It took me awhile to realize that Molly preferred smaller parties.

We had a piñata at Molly’s fifth birthday. It had strings for the kids to pull instead of a stick. Molly envisioned herself pulling the first string, and her guests orderly pulling one string each. Instead, 3 rough-and-tumble, adorable brothers immediately pulled all the strings!

The kids descended on the piñata. Molly was hysterical. I had to take her to her room. She wasn’t able to enjoy the rest of her painstakingly planned party. It was her only birthday that wasn’t awesome (at least not the latter half of her party). I still feel badly about it.

I let Eli dress himself. His clothes were mismatched and his pants were too small. Eli’s buddy’s mom said they belong to her son. I had no idea! We had a good laugh over a mimosa. When Molly and Nate turned 5, I dressed them in “perfect” outfits to match their beautiful parties.

We’ve had fun-filled events over the years and I wouldn’t trade any of our memories. But I like the “new me” who let the kids tear into Eli’s presents and break them all out. I’ve let go of anxiety, which allows me to soak in the joyful moments.

I really saw Eli’s when the garbage truck arrived. I stopped to appreciate the kids enjoying the piñata. Thanks to Nate, who ran the show, we had an orderly line. The kids went by age, each taking 3 swings. They loved it. Molly was surely smiling, so proud of both her brothers.

Meant to say, I saw Eli’s face light up 🤩. Lol.