My son played his last regular season game of soccer today; and I’ve had a pint or two of Guinness.
So it’s about to get very Hallmark movie in here very fast. You have been forewarned. If you strap in for the ride, ya gets what ya gets.
Anyway, let’s proceed.
1/
So it’s about to get very Hallmark movie in here very fast. You have been forewarned. If you strap in for the ride, ya gets what ya gets.
Anyway, let’s proceed.
1/
It wasn’t my son’s last game with this team. They have a tournament left in June.
Today was just the last match of the regular season.
Surely that couldn’t be enough to send a grown-ass man into a Guinness-fueled nostalgia thick as marmalade.
And yet here we are.
2/
Today was just the last match of the regular season.
Surely that couldn’t be enough to send a grown-ass man into a Guinness-fueled nostalgia thick as marmalade.
And yet here we are.
2/
I had that June tourney in my back pocket. That was my buffer. I wouldn’t need to get all emotional today, you see, because it wasn’t really my son’s last game of the year.
I fully believed that. I was good.
This wasn’t going to be the Day of Unbearable Sentimentality.
3/
I fully believed that. I was good.
This wasn’t going to be the Day of Unbearable Sentimentality.
3/
But then my son hugged one of his friends after the match. And then he hugged his other friend.
And I knew what that meant.
But we’ll come back to that. First, a little backstory.
4/
And I knew what that meant.
But we’ll come back to that. First, a little backstory.
4/
I introduced my son to soccer during the 2014 World Cup.
It became his passion. And thus it became one of mine.
When I was young, my father supported my passions in the way a patron supports the arts: through payment rather than participation.
I am not that kind of father.
5/
It became his passion. And thus it became one of mine.
When I was young, my father supported my passions in the way a patron supports the arts: through payment rather than participation.
I am not that kind of father.
5/
I have always encouraged my son to find his own interests knowing I will fully support him.
He knows that no matter what it is, when he finds a passion, I will lean in.
And so it has been with soccer.
He found a passion. I leaned in.
6/
He knows that no matter what it is, when he finds a passion, I will lean in.
And so it has been with soccer.
He found a passion. I leaned in.
6/
And what followed was a spectacular run of wins and losses; highs and lows; parenting successes - and hard personal lessons.
Most of all, what followed was the joy of getting to see my child caring very much about something and getting to share it with him.
7/
Most of all, what followed was the joy of getting to see my child caring very much about something and getting to share it with him.
7/
I played football my freshman year of high school.
My father came to only the final game of the season.
And he only came to that one because he was out of “...I’ll come to the next one’s.”
8/
My father came to only the final game of the season.
And he only came to that one because he was out of “...I’ll come to the next one’s.”
8/
Kids notice when absence was the choice because attendance wasn’t the priority.
And they notice when you had every reason to miss something but didn’t.
They notice.
9/
And they notice when you had every reason to miss something but didn’t.
They notice.
9/
I haven’t missed any of my son’s games. I had never even missed a practice until he reached the “just drop me off, please” age.
It has always been a priority.
He will never be uncertain about what mattered to me.
10/
It has always been a priority.
He will never be uncertain about what mattered to me.
10/
This year, my son’s passion for this level of soccer cooled a bit.
He has been signaling that this might be his last season of travel soccer.
I would certainly support that if it was his decision.
11/
He has been signaling that this might be his last season of travel soccer.
I would certainly support that if it was his decision.
11/
But I’m not going to lie, there is a part of me that has soaked in every minute of this season with an extra bittersweet attentiveness.
A chapter may soon close.
And I feel the weight of my son’s milestones heavily.
I always have.
12/
A chapter may soon close.
And I feel the weight of my son’s milestones heavily.
I always have.
12/
I have always experienced my son growing up fully and in the present while hearing in the background, a metronome, as it quietly tick-tocks away.
It is a clock that counts down not up.
It is my son’s childhood. And it is finite, fleeting.
13/
It is a clock that counts down not up.
It is my son’s childhood. And it is finite, fleeting.
13/
I kid you not, in the fullness of my joy of being my son’s father, I have felt also an ever-present awareness that this is all just so brief, this opportunity.
I have felt it in the way someone experiences a sunset. It is breathtaking and beautiful... and so very brief.
14/
I have felt it in the way someone experiences a sunset. It is breathtaking and beautiful... and so very brief.
14/
In my basement, there is a bin. In it is every pair of soccer cleats my son has ever worn.
I started filling it with his first pair.
I have always known that someday, there would be a last pair.
And someday, I would find a weathered plank somewhere. Driftwood or an old barn.
I started filling it with his first pair.
I have always known that someday, there would be a last pair.
And someday, I would find a weathered plank somewhere. Driftwood or an old barn.
And on it, I would mount each of my son’s cleats in a row like colorful footsteps from all the way back when he was my little boy in the size 3’s to whenever he had outgrown the game.
16/
16/
That day was today.
That “whenever he outgrew the game” was today.
I know my son.
Those hugs at the end of the game, those were his thank you’s and his goodbyes.
17/
That “whenever he outgrew the game” was today.
I know my son.
Those hugs at the end of the game, those were his thank you’s and his goodbyes.
17/
He has a tournament left but it is just for fun.
We’ll have a good time at it.
Today though... today was the last paragraph of a long chapter I have so very loved.
I know my son. He’s ready to step away from the game. This was it.
And he has my full support.
18/
We’ll have a good time at it.
Today though... today was the last paragraph of a long chapter I have so very loved.
I know my son. He’s ready to step away from the game. This was it.
And he has my full support.
18/
In my basement is a crate.
It will soon get one last pair of shoes.
And then I will begin a search for a suitable plank. One weathered over many seasons.
And then I’ll empty the crate and make art of memories.
19/
It will soon get one last pair of shoes.
And then I will begin a search for a suitable plank. One weathered over many seasons.
And then I’ll empty the crate and make art of memories.
19/
Today though, I am just thankful for the treasure of all this.
I am thankful for the gift of my son and the privilege to be his father.
I’m thankful for his passions and the joy of getting to share them.
I’m thankful for a chapter I’ve loved. And now I’ll love the next.
//
I am thankful for the gift of my son and the privilege to be his father.
I’m thankful for his passions and the joy of getting to share them.
I’m thankful for a chapter I’ve loved. And now I’ll love the next.
//
• • •
Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to
force a refresh
