My mistress with a monster is in love.
Near to her close and consecrated bower,
While we were out of doors at drinking hour,
A crew of Tories, rude mechanicals,
That piled the dead upon spurious calls,

1/5
Were met together to rehearse a play,
Intended for the Tories’ judgement day.
The shallowest thick-skin of that barren sort,
Who PM as presented, in his sport
Forsook his last Queen and did Carrie take
When I did him at this advantage make,
An ass's nole I fixed on his head:
Anon his lusting must be answered,
And forth the mimic comes. When they him spy,
As tabloids that the creeping voters eye,
Or russet-pated lads, many in sort,
Rising and cawing at the Sun's report,
Betray themselves and madly suck the lie,
So, at this sight, ‘Huzzah!’ his fellows cry;
And, at this pomp, here the sycophants crawl;
Gross failure prized, cadavers rendered schmaltz.
Their sense thus weak, lost with their fears thus strong,
Made senseless things begin to do them wrong;
Foreigners, poor, at these patriots snatch;
Some faith, some hope, from yielders all things catch.
I led them on in this distracted fear,
And left the sweet PM translated there:
When in that moment, so it came to pass,
Great Britain waked and straightway loved an ass.

• • •

Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to force a refresh
 

Keep Current with 🥛🇬🇧Michael Govern Ready🇬🇧🥛

🥛🇬🇧Michael Govern Ready🇬🇧🥛 Profile picture

Stay in touch and get notified when new unrolls are available from this author!

Read all threads

This Thread may be Removed Anytime!

PDF

Twitter may remove this content at anytime! Save it as PDF for later use!

Try unrolling a thread yourself!

how to unroll video
  1. Follow @ThreadReaderApp to mention us!

  2. From a Twitter thread mention us with a keyword "unroll"
@threadreaderapp unroll

Practice here first or read more on our help page!

More from @mikegove12

7 Apr
This is a celebratory fire.
To all the health and safety namby pambies out there, Andrew Bridgen is holding the crowds back with a supersoaker.
Read 8 tweets
1 Apr
Iagove reflects:

"Thus do we ever make you fools our purse:
For Tories own gain'd knowledge should profane,
If we would time expend with plebians.
But for my sport and profit. I hate you all:

1/4
And it is thought abroad, our sick elites
Are but leeching sophists: I know that it be true;
For I know men of Eton in that kind,
Who never parted puberty. They hold you low;
The better shall their purpose work on you.
Boris’s a shag-worn man: let me see now:
To get his place and to plume up my will
In double knavery--How, how? Let's see --
After some time, to abuse politicos’ ears
That he is too familiar with their lives.
He hath a hundred thousand dead disposed;
Would they reflect it?
Read 4 tweets
23 Feb
Daffodils.

I wandered lonely as a cloud
That floats on high o'er vales and hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd,
A host, of rotting daffodils;
Beside the lake, beneath the trees,
Browning and dying in the breeze.

1/4
Continuous as the stars that shine
And twinkle on the milky way,
They stretched in never-ending line
Along the margin of a bay:
Ten thousand saw I at a glance,
Shrivelled there dead in flyblown dance.
Flag wavers with them danced; but they
Out-did the sparkling Brexit glee:
A Leaver could not but be gay,
In such festering company:
I gazed—and gazed—but little thought
What wealth the show to me had brought:
Read 4 tweets
7 Jan
My interview with Donald Trump. A memory:

When I arrived in his office he pointed at a small pile of cocaine on his desk. I was horrified. A British guest should never impose like that.

"No thanks, I've brought my own." I said.
He grabbed my crotch.

"So, is that a B17 in your pocket, or are you just pleased to see me Jeff?"

"Mike." I corrected. "And its an erection." You could feel the electricity in the room.

Not wanting to be too forward but fully aware the special relationship needed maintaining,
I asked if I could massage his shoulders. He agreed.

"Do you think your incessant debasement of standards, associations with racists and paedophiles, and utter unsuitability for presidency, will have a negative effect on American politics?"

He passed me the Kentucky Bourbon
Read 5 tweets
8 Dec 20
A Christmas Carol.

Chapter Two.

A breakfast serialisation by Michael Govern Ready and Charles Dickens.

With artwork by

@MrJunkerBarlow

1/4
2/4
3/4
Read 4 tweets

Did Thread Reader help you today?

Support us! We are indie developers!


This site is made by just two indie developers on a laptop doing marketing, support and development! Read more about the story.

Become a Premium Member ($3/month or $30/year) and get exclusive features!

Become Premium

Too expensive? Make a small donation by buying us coffee ($5) or help with server cost ($10)

Donate via Paypal Become our Patreon

Thank you for your support!

Follow Us on Twitter!

:(