Warning
by Jenny Joseph

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn’t go, and doesn’t suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we’ve no money for butter.

scottishpoetrylibrary.org.uk/poem/warning/
I shall sit down on the pavement when I’m tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick flowers in other people’s gardens
And learn to spit.
You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beermats and things in boxes.
But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.
But maybe I ought to practise a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

• • •

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More from @MerryMichaelW

4 Jun
Nicholas Wilson (Mr Ethical) first told HSBC subsidiary HFC Bank in 2003 that charges they were adding to debts were illegal. They ignored him. He has campaigned ever since.
change.org/p/hsbc-hsbc-to…
2006 - NW reported his employers, Weightmans Solicitors, to the Solicitors Regulation Authority. They sacked him and referred to him as 'Mr Ethical'.

#MrEthical
2007 the SRA confirmed the charges were illegal, but did nothing
2010 the Office of Fair Trading told the bank to stop adding the charges.

#MrEthical
Read 9 tweets
3 Jun
Well, now, back to back, belly to belly, well, I don't give a damn 'cause I done dead already, back to back
Belly to belly at the zombie jamboree
Belly to belly at the zombie jamboree

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One female zombie wouldn't behave
She say she want me for a slave
In the one hand she's holding a quart of wine, in the other she's pointing that she'll be mine

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Well, believe me folks, I had to run. (Why?)
A husband of a zombie ain't no fun! (Don't knock it!)
I says, "Oh, no, my turtle dove, that old bag of bones I cannot love." Oh, what you doin'?

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2 Jun
A very long thread on aspects of the recent history of the NHS. 😊😊😊

The first attempt at removing democratic control of the #NHS was by Kenneth Clarke, when he was health secretary, 1988 - 1990. But that failed completely.
So we move on to Virginia Bottomley, who succeeded in removing the last vestiges of democratic control during the reorganisation of the NHS, prefigured here: "Health of the Nation" api.parliament.uk/historic-hansa….
Are you sitting comfortably? Area Health Authorities, 1973 - 1982 were replaced by District Health Authorities, 1982 - 1996. Thereafter no more input from those elected, the Health Authorities were entirely managed by "professionals", & are listed here: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Health_au….
Read 16 tweets
26 May
"À la recherche du temps perdu"

We are living through an era, analogous to 1868 - 1924, when the Labour Party was formed.

The Whigs fell apart from internal corruption(sounds familiar?), and while the Liberals were formed, many of the same people were involved.

thread 1/8
Subsequently, Lloyd George was also hugely corrupt, and the Liberals themselves fell.

The Labour Party entered Parliament in 1924, nearly one hundred years ago.

Ramsey McDonald was merely another carpetbagger, and it took another World War to see real change under Atlee.
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Many "great" men, and some women entered the Labour Party, and for a while, Harold Wilson held them together, rather in the manner of a circus ringmaster.

But Roy Jenkin's ego got the better of both him and the situation.
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Read 11 tweets
7 May
The seat of Hartlepool includes the town of Hartlepool itself and the nearby villages of Hart, Elwick, Greatham, Newton Bewley and Dalton Piercy.
The by-election was called following the resignation of sitting MP Mike Hill, and is the first since the current Parliament was elected in 2019.

There were sixteen candidates on the ballot paper - the most for any UK Commons by-election since 2008.
These are the results in full:

The Turnout for the vote was 42.55 per cent.

Jill Mortimer (Conservative) - 15,529
Paul Williams (Labour) - 8,589
Samantha Lee (Local Independent) - 2,904
Read 8 tweets

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