When I spoke w/@R_Denhollander, @pbethancourt, @ToddUnzicker, @JaredcWellman etc re. next steps &(hopefully) educating comm. members, the most disheartening thing to learn was of the roadblocks & lack of ability to get past certain members (Stone/Boto etc) it would be pointless
@R_Denhollander had been working to direct steps, advise, communicate on our behalf, @SusanCodone had been trying as well. @R_Denhollander walked through it with me to help protect my interests & heart. She told them that whatever I asked (of them)should be done & at my pace
I felt so apprehensive, I knew the cost, I knew how these like Stone & Patterson ilk operated & that I, like @jenlyell, could be shredded & left by the roadside emotionally & personally. These men play dirty b/c out of the heart it flows. They think we caused this & 2 blame
it’s Eve all over again, we are Delilah, Potiphar’s wife, hoars, temptresses, we ‘cause men’s weakness’ b/c they need 2 see it that way to exonerate themselves. We were victims of men who think they have power over us & look down on us. What is your excuse for boys who suffered?
When I went forward in 1991 to tell my Pastor about my abuser, my Mother was with me. When we left that office, my Mother was no longer 'with' me, she bought into the narrative that we needed to protect the church. We were told to be silent, silence became my world,pretend(thread
Not because I wasn't coming unglued inside & needed help, not b/c I was ok, I was a teen who didn't understand what just happened & what it meant in my identity. I was suddenly wary of everything. I was physically sick, lost so much weight, couldn't eat, shriveling w/ a smile(2)
With a smile b/c no one was to know what happened & I was @ church constantly as a youth, I was panicking in public spaces but no one knew b/c I hid it, I felt I didn't fit in anywhere now & pulled from friends, isolating my world. Parents never talked about it again as we all(3)
Thread: Before I release some correspondence between myself & others in regards to the committee & following #CaringWell I want to point out that some were acting on the only available action/directive they could, I do feel few were doing more behind the scenes & faced such+
opposition due to road blocks by higher authority & mass bullying (as said in Moore's letter) and I heard about that long before that was released, I'd posted many times about the "red tape" "roadblocks" because I knew that the opposition was fierce. Why? Because people like +
RonnieFloyd, Augie Boto, Paige Patterson etc.etc. do not want the lid of sexual abuse stories opened up for questions of handling because it would overthrow/disrupt their power structure. Please note this is why I say we need to tear it down to its roots, new leadership overhaul+