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Reinstated Doorknob Licker Profile picture
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12 Jul, 4 tweets, 1 min read
Wait wait wait, how were they boycotting Israel before there was an Israel?
I'm kidding, I know what she means, but boy is that a quiet part loud moment.
I'm still sitting here in awe that she just tweeted it out.
Almost a thousand likes for "yeah this isn't actually about Israel at all."

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More from @agraybee

Reinstated Doorknob Licker Profile picture
12 Jul
I'm getting flashbacks to the Venezuela protests when they found a protestor with a Washington Nationals hat, and decided that must have been a CIA agent who forget to take his hat off. This is not an exaggeration or a simplification of the theory, this was the real belief.
Think about what you'd have to believe to make that make sense. First you'd have to believe that only someone from the government could wear a Nats hat. Then you'd have to believe he walked around in a full America get up, and only changed into his Venezuela costume later.
Then there were the analyses of the whiteness of the protestors based on aerial shots. That was very normal.
Read 5 tweets
Reinstated Doorknob Licker Profile picture
12 Jul
Seems to me that a Super Smash Bros cinematic universe is a giant pile of money no one at Nintendo wants to pick up.
I'm sure there's far less interest in an 8-episode season of Pikachu teaming up with Solid Snake than there is of whatever the fuck Loki was about.
Close your eyes and picture the post-credits scene of the first Mario movie where they're celebrating Wario's demise and then a toadstool comes in and says "Princess, this just came through a warp pipe" and it's a turtle shell. Tell me you don't have goosebumps.
Read 5 tweets
Reinstated Doorknob Licker Profile picture
12 Jul
Given how the Cuban government is phasing out communism all on their own, I'm not sure why the CIA would be organizing protests against them.
Like, why would they oppose this. bbc.com/news/world-lat…
Isn't it weird how exactly zero communist dictatorships decided to keep the dictator's policies after he died?
Read 4 tweets
Reinstated Doorknob Licker Profile picture
19 Jun
The New York Times has a proud history of being wrong, but nothing, and I mean nothing, will ever beat the last paragraph of their endorsement of Abraham Lincoln.
Cc: @DougJBalloon
Their FDR endorsement makes it somewhat competitive though.
Read 4 tweets
Reinstated Doorknob Licker Profile picture
9 Jun
The blue checks stick together even when of them turns out to be a career con artist who robs and blackmails people.
This exact same thing can be said of Bernie Madoff but he was never good for engagement.
They're going all in on this.
Read 4 tweets
Reinstated Doorknob Licker Profile picture
31 May
I want a movie that shows the tragic backstory of the terrorist from Speed, and how his family was hit by a bus.
I want a prequel to Apollo 13 where we learn why the oxygen tank had a vendetta against the pressure sensor.
I want a Brave Little Toaster prequel where we learn why the air conditioner hates life.
Read 4 tweets

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