Thread by @thisisfoster

The courtship model is exceedingly difficult when:

1) many families are broken
2) fathers are absent (in reality or functionally)
3) parents have ungodly goals for their children
4) delayed maturation has greatly decreased the availability of good spousal candidates

This fourth issue makes young marriage difficult.

You either have to choose from the available candidates or delay getting married until you can find a more suitable candidate.

Hence, even those pursuing a young marriage can find themselves marrying much later than expected.

Consequently, both men and women, including those that are pro-marrying as soon as possible, entering relationships for the purpose of marriage are rarely teens.

They have cars, careers/jobs, and even their own apartments/houses.

These are 20+ year olds with ton of freedom.

There is weird disconnect from reality when it comes to this topic with Christians. They are imagining teenagers getting to know each other on the front porch swing of one their parents houses where they still live.

That still happens but it’s just not the norm any longer.

Also, I’ll add that see some very unhealthy things encouraged in many courtship relationships.

For example, there is very strong chivalric impulse that encourages the pedestaling of the woman.

Another problem that is common is an overbearing father who requires the male suitor to more or less emasculate himself to “win” the daughter’s hand in marriage. These things aren't intrinsic to courtship but they are often present for whatever reason.