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Jul 29, 2021 15 tweets 5 min read Read on X
Why Women Shouldn't Wear Skinny Jeans Part 1
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#ghettothursday

There is that feeling of uneasiness inoitika kana wakagara pachemba uchiita hako number 2 paya panosplasher tumvura tworova a comeback. Ndiyo exact permanent feeling yaunonzwa kana usingaende kugraft. Image
Ghetto rakazondiremera heavy zvekusvika pakuti kumahwindi varungu. Ndanga ndapafinal stage yedesperation iya inonzi RR or chamuka inyama. Mhepo dzemadzinza dzinenge dzakajamuka rough I remember kunaLyton uko ndakanzi hapana basa ndikati chero kugeza hangu fence ndinoda Image
Chero paden kukutuma vanenge vakutonzwa tsitsi coz chese chinoda kuitwa unenge uchingoita pasina akutuma and usina pressure. Vanogona kuzosara kumuka watsvaira yard, kudiridza maruva,watoisa porridge pamoto imbwa yagezwa wakutodzumburudza, mashizha emuMango wapukuta achipenyerera Image
Momz yakazosvika pakusasa nemufundisi wekukelaz kwayo kuti mkomana hapana zvaangawanirwewo here kubasa kwenyu akati ngaambouye kuinterview tinzwe. Ndakafara semwana wechikoro anzi vese vasina kubhadara fees dzokerai kumba Image
On the night before ndakarara ndakapfeka sutu yangu. Early monaz ndanga ndapamakombi ndine laptop bag that had everything else besides the laptop itself. Dai ndakaita mistake yekunzi neporisi budisai zvirimubag, hah ndaidaidzirwa H Metro Image
PaBusstop ndaingozviitawo working class,ko ndini ndadini. Ndaingolouder "Eish makombi akuda kutinonotsa kubasa, nezuro ndakanonoka fut apa ndini ndine makeys". Kungodai ndoburitsa fone checking time...unokwara mubhora Image
Ndakasvika tonaz bvandananga paoffice yacho kuMilton Park. I was so early ndakatangira guard weDay shift ndikatombodziya moto newepanight shift. Ndiye akazondiudza kuti the company was a Funeral service...ini aah hoh hapana kushata.hanty chandirikuda igraft Image
Mufundisi vakazosara kusvika ndanguri ndatenderedza ma angles ese emushana like a pro I was. Ko ndoyanga yave specialty zve. Handiudzirwe mushana. Dai zvaienderwa kumaOlympics guess who would be your Kirsty..my only competition would be vakadzi ve areaz yangu Image
Dzichipinda ndakangogutsirira ndichiti Good morning sir nevoice rinoitwa nemunhu abata poto inopisa, (PANIC MODE) damn so early..asi I had rehearsed this moment in the mirror since last year and had perfected it last night Image
Dzakangotarisa hadzo dzikati "aah wasvika mwanangu. My secretary will call after 10mins need to check my email". Eheka ndo business language ka iyi. Aiwa mukuru itai yamunoita ko ndikumhanyirepi. Patience chete here. Ndini wacho...not zvekunzi kuchipatara what what Image
Longest and shortest 10 mins of my life. I became a prayer warrior ipapo zvekudarika mudzimai facing a cheating husband with a pregnant side chick...pakangoshota number dza Prophet Madungwe chete Image
30 mins and 1 hour dzakapera ndisati ndadaidzwa ndikati rega ndimbonzwa secretary kuti how far. Munoziya attitude yetuvasikana tunotengesa pakashop one kanenge karimuchakasara. Kanoita sekunge kanoswera kari busy nepo ndiwe customer yega that day. Right Image
Kakaramba kakanyarara kunge munhu arikuverenga materms and conditions epa internet. Bvakazongoti, "manga mafunga kudii". Ndakangoti iyi ndotype inofollowa mai titi na madam boss, Nigerian movies,Zee world,type inoti kumusha kwedu kuEpworth..hakana kuziya kuti ndiri weghetto Image
Ndakangoti ndezvako izvo straight ndakananga kuoffice yamufundisi. Ndakangosvikono knocker ka1 nekuvhura door. If I say kuti what I saw was a shocker ndinenge ndichitonyepa.....
Watch out for part 2...
Zvamirikufunga hazvisirizvo trust me Image
Maybe ndirikuzvifonera futi. Imbotaridzai nema retweet and follow tione kuti tokontinya here to part 2
#ghettothursday

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More from @millythebae

Feb 1, 2022
Valentines, Mitchell and Chitungwiza is a combination isingafanire kupinda mu1 sentence. Combo iyi yakasimba kudarika Russian vodka is dilution. I will tell you a story of my personal experiences.
#goodghettovibe
A thread about my life in ghetto
1. 2 years ago paVale ndakaisirwa mssge naMitchie achiti mdara wake is in Kwekwe so I can come and spend night paden pake. Akazosara kukata fone ndanga ndatova pabus stop ndakutoita pressure pakombi kubaya paden pake. Isu tiri ana mugaradzakasungwa
2. 5 bells ndichidonha paden pake. Handina kumboita zvekunoka pagedhi coz manext door ane maziso anodarika camera ye iPhone combined with S21 Ultra. Ndakatambirwa nezihug, ziElectro convulsive therapy hug. Rekuti unobva ipapo usingagone kufamba, men will know
Read 11 tweets
Jan 23, 2022
A thread about how my mother discovered that I was now drinking beer

1. Pafeya momz yangu raised me well. Yanga iri mukadzi weruwadzano munhu wekelaz so misikanzwa yese ndaingoti muroyi royera kure but rina manyanga hariputirwe, rinoda kungoiswa mubox...Why?
#goodghettovibe
2. Ndakasvika paden ndakabata 2 macots eCastle ne empty rechi 3. Time was around 1145pm. Ndandisati ndambononoka paden kudai coz momz had a policy yekuti mwana anopakurirwa ndearipo, asipo ihombarume. So whatever I did I made sure ndasvika paden before 730pm. But on this day...
3. ..mweya wetsvna wakafamba ndikazvisimbisa kusvika paden 1130pm ndakarohwa nemupeta. Ndakavhura gate ndichidaidzira kuti "auya mwana waJessica naWilson, chipazhamongo vapindira, ndauya ini mudyi wenhaka" Hah kana mudzimu wakurasha unenge watoita deny paternity zveshuwa.
Read 14 tweets
Aug 8, 2021
DATING HRE GIRLS: BODY COUNT EDITION Part 2
#goodghettovibe
A Thread

2.1 Someone once said kuti pane munhu achazongodaidzira ari pakati petonaz CBD kuti "hah vakadzi so" obva angodonhera pasi nekutoti zii ipapo ipapo. Anyway we move..So nebabe rangu we continued bho zvekuti....
2.2Babe was always full of surprises nomatter the day. Rimwe day babe had a workshop kuVic Falls so rakati I'm booking a flight ndoda uuye the following wknd. (Hey that flight I will have a thread on its own bcoz it was my first ever)
2.3 So ndini uyo ndasvika kuHotel kwaigara babe zvikanzi I have a surprise for you daddy, ko ndanga ndatosvika malevels ekunzi daddy, zvana bae izvo ndezvekushaya. So akabva anditora ndiye neni downstairs ndakavharwa maziso, chaive chirungu chete apa ndakadya easy sehwai
Read 13 tweets
Aug 5, 2021
DATING HRE GIRLS : BODY COUNT EDITION Part 1
#goodghettovibe

1.1 A saying in Hre is that It's much easier for a Zupco bus to pass thru an eye of a needle than a Hre girl with an iPhone to text you first. I'm a living testimony. No matter the drip...unless of course you're Mudi Image
1.2 So this girl taiviber bho, we hd a relationship like chibhodhoro nedilution,or so I thought. Yekushaya jagwa yangu iyi kanga kasina kana dhiri nazvo, or so I thought. Taigona kubva kuna 7th kunobata Mkt Square netsokorolla dzedu no pressure Image
1.3 Iko kuna 7th ndakazomboridzwa rata neboys tiri payapaya,mapaziyaka ehee ipapo. Tikafamba kubva ikoko kunobata RBZ nzeve dzakavhara dzichirira landline but still babe rakamira neni. Kana rakandiseka maybe rakandiseka nemafriends aro varivega, I wouldn't know hangu Image
Read 17 tweets
Jul 26, 2021
Part 3 Harare Girls

I sat on the edge of bed lyk a choir gal on honeymoon. Dai ndaiva nekashagi ndaiwana pekutangira. Maface emughetto hatina mari yatinomboshafa paside in case of emergency. Our savings acc is the back pocket, ikaiswa kufront pocket yatove 'u only live once' Image
Most ppl don't understand why I was sweating in winter. Momz yangu can vava. Make no mistake,she is a very devoted christian with Mahendere CD that nvr bn removed from the DVD since 2015. Bcoz of what I am abt to say, if I mention church yavanopinda, I will be sued by vanhu veUMC Image
Momz yangu ine short fuse zvekuti ukaita offside inokutema nechinhu chainenge yakabata ipapo.Muden medu chinhu chega chandisina kumbotemwa nacho is TV and kitchen unit bcoz one TV yakamountwa kumadziro and two kitchen unit is fitted. #africanparents Image
Read 16 tweets
Jul 23, 2021
Part 2 Harare Girls

Ndakaita about a minute ndichikanganwa my own cell number, ndichingoiisa ndakadairwa nekamukadzi kaya keEconet kachiti number not reachable. I tried 14 times ndopandakaona kuti kamukadzi kaya ndichandagwinyira. Ndakabva ndangoridza zitsamwa rekwaMai Azuka Image
Semunhu anga akarova smart I tried not to panic. Asi umm...Ukaona muhupenyu usati wagara pasi mutara wosimuka wogara wosimuka wofamba wobata muchiuno negotsi zvese ka1 take your time to pray. Ndakazviita in less than a minute until guard wepaSpar ati endai neconfusion yenyu kure Image
Ndichiri pakati pekunzwa masigns and symptoms eCovid, ndakagaya plan : I will fone my kule Puro who had solutions to every prblm, after all, he footed medical funeral bills of anyone in the family, he solved all family issues including vanorohwa nevarume,kutizira,he was just good Image
Read 17 tweets

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