In the first eight days of August, Lauren has sent 51 tweets, at an average salary of $74.78 per tweet.
This weekend’s highlights: 4 tweets on I-70, 3 on immigration, 3 on COVID. She says she’s working with the Democratic Representatives and
Senators to get I-70 open again. You know, those same legislators she usually insults.
God made a brief appearance in a tweet of her holding a goat, and she did her 61st grifting tweet of the year. The goat looked uncomfortable as Lauren puckered up to kiss. I was
uncomfortable, too. I mean, who knows where those lips have been?
She also appeared on a podcast by Dinesh D'Souza. You might remember him as the man who pled guilty to an election law felony, or as the man who dated dated Laura Ingraham and Ann Coulter before he married a
woman who later accused him of physical abuse, including kicking her and knocking her to the ground. Oh, and of course, #tfg pardoned him.
Hey, Lauren, you’re known by the company you keep, ya know? I guess Fox, OAN, and NewsMax must not find her all that
interesting any more. Who can blame them?
512 more days of her superciliousness.
456 days till Election 2022.
Lud·dite | ˈlədˌīt |
noun
1 derogatory a person opposed to new technology or ways of working: a small-minded Luddite resisting progress | I'm not a Luddite, after all I work with the internet for my job.
2 historical a member of any of the
bands of English workers who destroyed machinery, especially in cotton and woolen mills, that they believed was threatening their jobs (1811–16).
adjective
1 derogatory opposed to new technology or ways of working: this bill is really a Luddite approach
to science | there'll still be plenty of Luddite customers like me who are yet to embrace the future.
2 historical denoting or relating to the 19th-century Luddites who destroyed machinery that they believed was threatening their jobs: the Luddite movement | the Luddite
Excerpts from Lauren Boebert’s forthcoming book on American history. [A ridiculously long thread]
God told Columbus that he needed to go on a vacation. Columbus built an ark and loaded all the animals of Europe on it. Except the unicorns. The unicorns were too gay.
God, however, knew that Columbus was a coward, so he invented a story about how he could get to China by sailing west.
Columbus wasn’t very good at geography, but he was good at following directions. When his trip to China was inconveniently blocked by a whole continent,
Columbus realized that God works in mysterious ways. He unloaded all those animals in Florida and they spread out over all of North America.
When he encountered other humans, at first he was troubled. Whoa, he said. There are other human here! When he knocked on the doors to
Is it time for the Friday edition of the #BoebertReportCard? Yes, it is!
16 tweets from her campaign account, 2 from her official account! What productivity!
By my calculations, the average cost per tweet so far this month is $37.83. What value for the money! (Thread)
It appears that the “happy warrior” did not have a happy day. Her tone was angry again today, even though “Life is too short to always be angry.”
We see that Cuba has moved up in the leader board, #5 following Word Salad, Democrats, COVID, and Biden. Just a few short days ago, she didn’t even know where Cuba was! What a scholar!
So here’s your #BoebertReportCard for Thursday July 15. I need a day away from her bile, so you get it early. Lauren tweeted only eight times. About Denver. About Cuba. About guns. About those pesky Democrats. But nothing about her district or anything in it.
Oh, and anger. I’ve been subjecting myself to the horror of her tweets for months, and this is the most egregious and unabashedly ironic one I’ve seen. The angriest member of the House said, “Life’s too short to always be angry. Let’s be happy warriors for Jesus and happy
warriors for Freedom.” Wow.
Well, we hope she has a chance to work on her anger management issues as she jets off to Florida again. Still waiting on FEC filings so we can see how many of her 2nd quarter excursions were paid for by her voluntary donors and how many by Uncle Sam.
Since @AOC is too polite to ever humiliate @RepBoebert in an actual debate, here's a couple of videos to highlight the differences...
Here's AOC's video summarizing her accomplishments in her first term. Articulate, intelligent, and focused. Really, you need to watch this to see what a Rep can be like.
Pretty quiet on today’s #BoebertReportCard. She only tweeted 7 times yesterday, and four of those were about Cuba. Nothing about Colorado. It’s like she’s not even trying.
Maybe she’s practicing her speech for this weekend at TPUSA in Tampa. For those having a hard time keeping up, that’ll be her fifth trip to Florida this year.
I learned that the TP in TPUSA does not stand for Toilet Paper. But it could. Oh, and she made her fourth grift tweet in as many days. Those Florida trips ain’t gonna pay for themselves, folks.