John Bull Profile picture
17 Aug, 20 tweets, 5 min read
OH MY GOD.

SHE'S SITTING IN THE BOX WITH MY HOODIE IN THAT I PUT BY THE DOOR FOR HER.

BRAVE LITTLE STRAY KITTY!

Snooze little kitty. You're safe here. Little kitty snoozing in the box
SNOOZING IS HAPPENING. Snoozing kitty
This has been slow work. She's so jumpy and scared. And she was so hungry when she first appeared in the garden.

It's been a few weeks now of just putting down a bit of food and kitty milk, then backing away and making it absolutely clear that she is welcome to have it or not.
I put that box there about a week ago so she's hopefully start to see it as a safe spot that was still right next to the open door if she needed to run.

Had no idea if it would work, but hoped a cardboard box AND soft hoodie might seem very tempting if it got cold.
SHE LOOKS HAPPY.

I'm so glad.
Of course now I basically can't bloody move for the next hour, or until she decides she's had enough.

Don't want to spook her.
ACTUAL CURLED UP KITTY BALL SNOOZING. Kitty properly curled up in a snoozy ball in the box
I really need a glass of wine though. though. Is there a service that will come to my house and quietly pass a glass of wine through my front window?

Uber but for sneaky wine.
Also, I left my writing playlist running over there on my laptop.

If she expects me to have classical music playing next to her box every time she wants a nap, we're going to have issues.
KITTY SNORES. THERE ARE KITTY SNORES.

Phone mic won't pick then up from this distance but

THERE

ARE

KITTY

SNORES
You won't hear them as I'm at 6x zoom, but you can see from the deep breaths that she's proper deep snoozing.

Poor kitty. She clearly needs it.
Anyway. @BecksBiochemist is hiding upstairs to try and avoid making noise and spooking her, and I'm going to try and play some Stellaris for a while.

Legit delighted at kitty snoozing in the box though. Feels like progress to finding her a better life that she deserves.
To those asking if we'd keep her: it's complex.

We have to think about #notMyCat as we don't want him feeling like he can't come round.
If she stays for a bit, if we can get her to a vet, if she's healthy, if we get her snipped and if she's less of a hussy around #notMyCat then maybe.

But that's a lot of ifs.

Right now though she's got food security and a snooze box. It's an improvement.
SIDE SNOOZING. WE HAVE BELLY EXPOSED SIDE SNOOZING.

(Soz. It's tricky to get photos from here without moving and I really don't want to wake her) Kitty snoozing in the box
Just a kitty enjoying her snooze box.
Am awake. Food now? Food cupboard is this one, right? Kitty looking at me from near door.Kitty looking at cupboard.
We have her bonus kitty milk to try and reinforce the chill safe mood, but also bring her a bit more into the room Has met with approval.
And now she's strolled out, happily.

Thank god. I can now get some wine. 😆
BREAKING: Returned!

Definite thawing in relations.

We have passed the "not murdering me in my sleep" test I think.

Now enjoying some proper Felix cat food for nourishment. Kitty licking her lips while eating Felix.

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More from @garius

13 Sep
🚨🚨 Breaking Little Stray Kitty news 🚨🚨
She's still super nervous in the house. She'll perch for a moment in the enticing boxes with soft things in, then she'll spring up and be all:

"NOPE NOPE can't risk. Mustn't stay. Bye thank you 4 fud."

If this was an anime she'd be sad nervous lonely girl.

It's heartbreaking.
But hopefully we get there before the real cold weather kicks in. And we still need to find a way to get her to a vet so she can be snipped and health checked.

But this is progress. Slow. But progress.
Read 5 tweets
13 Sep
Kids menu chicken nugget lunch and the latest issue of Modern Drunkard.

Adulthood is what you decide you want it to be. Magazine next go box containing nuggets and chips.
Really good article on EJ Gallo trying to go upmarket and quietly ditching Night Train/Thunderbird, in case you're trying to squint at what I'm reading.
Btw for those of you who thought Guns n Roses were singing about an actual night train... Bless.

The song was about EJ Gallo's dirty little bottles of power boozing.
Read 4 tweets
13 Sep
Weirdly, I actually know the answer to this. Knew it as soon as I heard it.

Pretty cert the Matrix version of White Rabbit is the same one that was on the soundtrack for The Game (1997), which was a very slightly up-mixed version from Jefferson's 1967 album Surrealistic Pillow.
I know this (or think I do) because I remember hearing it in an otherwise mediocre film as a 17 year old and it blew my mind so fucking much I bought the soundtrack on Cassette.

Good luck finding it today though.
Good news is that it really is only slightly different from the Surrealistic Pillow mono version. Which you can find on Spotify here, and is a critical part of my "Music for drunken night bus trips home from Central London" personal playlist.

open.spotify.com/track/0B06qo77…
Read 16 tweets
11 Sep
Love that Brenda is up at midnight on a Saturday, knocking back the Merlot and just watching random shit on Amazon Prime. letter from the queen congr...
I wonder if, once a week, some rando director of a terrible straight to video movie wakes up to a letter like this in their email.

Brenda's drunk watching is so much more awesome than mine.
I bet the rest of the royals wanted to watch it on Channel 4, but the queen was like:

Fuck offff. This is the first time I'll have used my Prime Sub for anything other than free Twitch subscriptions in MONTHS. Fire up the lappy.
Read 4 tweets
3 Sep
Right. It's Friday. So have a (relatively) short history thread!

Let's talk about the plan to use Lancasters, not B29s drop the first atomic bombs.

Because I've noticed this story popping up a fair bit again recently. And there's truth in it, but often surrounded by myth. /1 Lancaster flying alongside a hurricane
Let's get one thing out of the way first:

Lancaster bombers COULDN'T have done the Hiroshima/Nagasaki raids, as flown. This is the thing I've been seeing thrown around and it's just plane wrong. (😉)

Got that? Coolio.

But there's a nugget of truth here. Here's what happened:
Meet Norman Ramsey Jr. Ramsey headed up the E-7 Group within the Manhattan Project. He was the chap in charge of working out how to actually get the big explodey bombs (once built) to the target.

This was not easy. From the beginning, it was clear they'd be rather big. Ramsey signing the Fat Man bomb
Read 41 tweets
3 Sep
Help.

I'm stuck. Kitty curled up in my legs on the bed.
Have booked the day off work. It was the only option.
I blame @BecksBiochemist. She must have left the patio door open downstairs.
Read 17 tweets

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