Chakshu started at the screen. Eight windows of work colleagues talking, discussing; their voices filling his empty room.
8 colleagues he had never met.
His finger inched towards the cursor to unmute, an important point on the tip of his tongue.
He sighed, let it go.
THREAD.
8 colleagues he had never met.
His finger inched towards the cursor to unmute, an important point on the tip of his tongue.
He sighed, let it go.
THREAD.
A 100 unread emails filled his inbox. Names of people whom he spoke to every day about numbers and projects, and nothing else.
He knew Deepa by her energetic Hiii-s, Pankaj by his slight stutter and weird punctuation, Milan by her smilies and pretty ppts.
Nothing else.
2.
He knew Deepa by her energetic Hiii-s, Pankaj by his slight stutter and weird punctuation, Milan by her smilies and pretty ppts.
Nothing else.
2.
Yesterday, Jaggi, his old friend from his last job had texted. The conversation had been brief.
"Kaisa hai, achha hoon, kaam kaise chal raha hai, mummi-papa kaise hai"... You know the type.
The exact opposite of the kind they used to share in 2019, physically, over a smoke.
3.
"Kaisa hai, achha hoon, kaam kaise chal raha hai, mummi-papa kaise hai"... You know the type.
The exact opposite of the kind they used to share in 2019, physically, over a smoke.
3.
Someone said his name, asked a question. Chakshu reeled his mind in and gave his input.
His boss' voice (video off) sounded off something sarcastic. Chakshu's confidence hit a new low.
He felt sad. Low.
Alone.
4.
His boss' voice (video off) sounded off something sarcastic. Chakshu's confidence hit a new low.
He felt sad. Low.
Alone.
4.
Amit from Finance chipped in, with the usual chip on his shoulder. These IIM types, Chakshu thought, irritated, feeling worse.
"If you hate the job so much, why don't you quit," his sister had asked, exasperated, the other day.
Rightly exasperated—
5.
"If you hate the job so much, why don't you quit," his sister had asked, exasperated, the other day.
Rightly exasperated—
5.
—she'd heard so much unnecessary ranting from him since he'd joined the place four months back.
But Chakshu didn't want to quit. The job paid well, and maybe when he finally met his colleagues, they'd like him and he'd like them too?
The call was winding down.
Finally.
6.
But Chakshu didn't want to quit. The job paid well, and maybe when he finally met his colleagues, they'd like him and he'd like them too?
The call was winding down.
Finally.
6.
Chakshu had barely spoken. He thought he should say something bold, analytical—make his impression this monthly review.
But he sighed and gave up.
What was the point? To these people he was still the 'new guy', an email id, a voice and a source of numbers.
7.
But he sighed and gave up.
What was the point? To these people he was still the 'new guy', an email id, a voice and a source of numbers.
7.
"I don’t want to straight-face you
Race or chase you, track or trace you
Or disgrace you or displace you
Or define you or confine you
All I really want to do
Is, baby, be friends with you,"
Bob Dylan's voice would sing through his empty room in a bit.
But to what end?
8.
Race or chase you, track or trace you
Or disgrace you or displace you
Or define you or confine you
All I really want to do
Is, baby, be friends with you,"
Bob Dylan's voice would sing through his empty room in a bit.
But to what end?
8.
Call done, he headed to wash his face & change out of the crisp shirt into something rumpled enough to match his boxers.
Yet another day was over. And he hadn't made an 'inpact'.
Atleast it was done.
The phone rang.
Chakshu grimmaced.
With little enthusiasm, he answered.
9.
Yet another day was over. And he hadn't made an 'inpact'.
Atleast it was done.
The phone rang.
Chakshu grimmaced.
With little enthusiasm, he answered.
9.
It was Raghav from Sales asking for some numbers. Robotically, Chakshu obliged. Raghav hmm-ed.
Task done, between them a silence settled.
"So," Raghav asked tentatively, "How have your first 4 months been, yaar?"
Good heavens, thought Chakshu, here we go with small talk...
10
Task done, between them a silence settled.
"So," Raghav asked tentatively, "How have your first 4 months been, yaar?"
Good heavens, thought Chakshu, here we go with small talk...
10
An hour later, Chakshu & Raghav had exchanged insta handles.
Raghav had a dog who seemed hilarious & also seemed to be terrible at dating online. He asked Chakshu questions about home, his sister and food. They complained about how long it had been since fresh brewed beer.
11.
Raghav had a dog who seemed hilarious & also seemed to be terrible at dating online. He asked Chakshu questions about home, his sister and food. They complained about how long it had been since fresh brewed beer.
11.
An hour later when Chakshu hung up, he just sat and smiled.
Had he made friend today?
At 28 being excited over something as simple as making a friend seemed wild.
Shaking his head in disbelief as he got up to make dinner, his phone buzzed.
12.
Had he made friend today?
At 28 being excited over something as simple as making a friend seemed wild.
Shaking his head in disbelief as he got up to make dinner, his phone buzzed.
12.
"Yaar email dekh. Saturday ko bhi kaam deta hai, khadoos, zalim," the Whatsapp message said.
"Saath mein zoom pe karein kya?" Chakshu replied.
"DONE. And after that virtual watch party for India match?"
13.
"Saath mein zoom pe karein kya?" Chakshu replied.
"DONE. And after that virtual watch party for India match?"
13.
Chakshu's sister didn't get a call that day.
Chakshu did unmute and make his point on Monday.
When IIM type Amit "interjected" with his "tiny nuance" on their next group call, Chakshu turned off his camera to stiffle a laugh. Raghav, on Whatsapp, was hilarious.
14.
Chakshu did unmute and make his point on Monday.
When IIM type Amit "interjected" with his "tiny nuance" on their next group call, Chakshu turned off his camera to stiffle a laugh. Raghav, on Whatsapp, was hilarious.
14.
And endearing, and patient, and someone to trust.
Yes, he was still a voice, still a screen, still words on text—but a friend nevertheless.
Someone to laugh with, someone to bitch to, someone to conspire with, someone whom he looked forward to talking to, and likewise.
14.
Yes, he was still a voice, still a screen, still words on text—but a friend nevertheless.
Someone to laugh with, someone to bitch to, someone to conspire with, someone whom he looked forward to talking to, and likewise.
14.
And sometimes, THAT is all we really need, all that is needed to change how we see our lives. :)
FIN.
FIN.
This one is for everyone who has started a job in this long, long pandemic and roll their eyes every time they hear yet another person say, "The future is virtual, by 2050 all offices will be online."
Hope you all have someone to laugh with+ conspiratorialy smile at, at work! :)
Hope you all have someone to laugh with+ conspiratorialy smile at, at work! :)
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