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John Bull Profile picture
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18 Oct, 7 tweets, 2 min read
Hi. You're late. And drunk.

You should give me snacks.
I've never been preyed on so much as this cat is trying to prey on me now.
I'm trying to cook a curry and this is the situation.
Apparently I have offended him.
When you forget you're trying to be annoyed and fall asleep.
Full snooze.
We've agreed duvet legs will be provided as overall compensation for this evening.

This offer has been accepted.

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More from @garius

John Bull Profile picture
20 Oct
I kind of agree with this, but think it modifying rather than removing.

Truth is, we live in a parliamentary democracy with political parties. Therefore, MPs are often required to vote with the party line.

The output needs modifying to show when your issue is with the PARTY.
Yes, yes, I know any MP COULD vote against the whip, theoretically, but there is always a lot of nuance in play with that. Let's not pretend there isn't. It's not how life works.

A big issue these days is removing nuance and oversimplification of politics.
Yes, I know that there's a tiny bit of grey writing on the full voting record page that gives some vague indication of whether they toed the party line, but that's really not clear enough.

Because in most instances, it's the BIGGEST driver of how they voted.
Read 8 tweets
John Bull Profile picture
18 Oct
Literally anything.

I've written stories that sprung from a smell, or the sting in a piece of music, or just a throwaway line someone said on a bus.

I've basically never been able to stop my imagination going off on one once triggered.

Turned out that was a feature, not a bug.
I've also found this is why I rarely write in a linear fashion. I tend to have a very rough timeline of events, and then over time scenes within that just get written as the right emotional mood hits me, or a smell triggers me etc. etc.

Then BOSH. 2000 more words done.
Also means I'm hugely wasteful as a writer. I end up throwing away a LOT when the full story starts to emerge and suddenly 'scenes' don't fit.

Which is agonising enough in the short story format. I'm discovering it's utterly traumatising (but necessary) in the novel process.
Read 6 tweets
John Bull Profile picture
18 Oct
You may have noticed that I firmly believe the same approach applies to writing conversational history (e.g. threads).

90% of people don't give a shit what number Battalion it was that advanced.

They care WHERE they came from. They care WHO they were.

History is people.
Now OBVIOUSLY if you're writing an effing academic paper on it, or a book aimed at historians (paid or amateur) then you need the extra precision.

But think about your audience, and err towards under, not over-explaining.

Make an emotional connection first. Battalions later.
I care about which battalions it was. I should be able to tell you which battalions it was if you ask (or at the very least point you to where you can find out).

But that's because I'm already interested in that stuff.
Read 7 tweets
John Bull Profile picture
13 Oct
Okay, this is a good opportunity to talk flood gates on the London Underground. The myths, the reality, and the known unknowns.

Spoiler: there are less than you think, and they were never there for the reasons you think. And the Thames Barrier is really, REALLY important. /1
So the first thing you need to think about here is what the Thames actually is, and what its relationship to London has always been:

It's been the city's lifeblood for centuries, but also its biggest divider. It's what protects us northerners from southerners, and vice-versa.
It was also a big barrier to the early railways. Because tunnelling under a river, particularly a tidal one, is pretty fucking hard.

So hard, in fact, that it took the combined brains of Marc, Isambard and Brunel to do it.
Read 25 tweets
John Bull Profile picture
13 Oct
Anyone who thinks MPs are lazy hasn't seen how much time Stella Creasy has to spend each week writing to TfL about the lift at Walthamstow Central being broken again.

(I'm not being snarky here. She's an insanely good constituency MP)
I honestly think it would be quicker if TfL just gave her a JIRA account.
There's a reason she wins the seat in General Elections with the kind of majority that would make Saddam Hussein blush.

And it's not just demographic shift in the area.
Read 4 tweets
John Bull Profile picture
12 Oct
"Housing costs are not included on the assumption that most pensioners have paid off mortgages."

Fixed that for you, BBC/Loughborough Uni. altered bbc headline screenshot - Pensions: experts say £10
(Also, not being funny, but when I retire and don't have to work anymore, 10k a year is going to be my annual bar tab. But that may be just me)
"For the first time in the assessment, Netflix subscriptions and items such as haircuts are included"

Remember kids, the people who do one of the best known pension requirement calculations started factoring in Netflix and chill before they factored in the lack of home-ownership
Read 11 tweets

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