Thread by @Truth4Ont

What if everyone followed Doug Ford on how to lead? A 🧵

1. Firefighters would show up to a call, take a selfie with the fire, & then simply hand over the firehose to the homeowner so they don’t get wet
#onpoli

2. Electric vehicle manufacturers can no longer market their vehicles as being green since Ford has discovered it is the HWY itself that is better for greenhouse gases & not the vehicle. #onpoli #BradfordBypass

3. All food delivery services that contain meat products will now be dropped off at the nearest intersection to avoid offending your neighbour who may be anti-meat
#onpoli
#antivaxxers

4. All car washes will remove all mechanization and will simple consist of drivers entering, the door closing, and a bucket and sponge being wheeled in…see Ontario needs workers. As a bonus a Johnny-on the spot will be available but will require a vaccine passport to use
#onpoli

5. Directors, Superintendents, Principals & VPs are encouraged to limit their time at work to 30 minutes. Where possible avoid direct questioning from staff and ensure adequate supply of ice cream and Tim Hortons
#onpoli

6. Teachers deliver curriculum but let students mark their own work, determine overall grades and write their own report card comments. #onted #onpoli

7. Minister Lecce (AKA The Count of Cortellucci) announces plans to implement Gaslighting 101 into #onted curriculum as a marketable job skill. He then pays a US firm $500M to compile all his answers at QP as a resource & calls it increased funding for Education in Ontario.

8. Santa Claus tells the children of Ontario the importance of being good all year in order to get presents on Christmas, and then on Dec 1st…he says “psyche” and rewards everyone equally
#onpoli

9. Netflix decides to cap all employee raises at 1% and offers rebates to viewers that have children ages 4- 13 b/c they care about the future of the province. #onted #onpoli