Thread by @astro_katross

I had the most wholesome and life changing interaction at #Astrofest2021 on the weekend, it gives me goosebumps and makes me smile every time I think about it.

A thread about parents, neurodivergence and outreach 1/19

I was volunteering at the @ICRAR stand talking about our research and pathways to come study with us. I love it so much, I get to show people that there isn't *one* way to get into astrophysics
I took a winding route, failed courses, took a break but ultimately I'm here! 2/19

I always try focus my energy on the student and figure out what they're nervous about and talk about other routes because it's the student I want to encourage and spark the love of #STEM in and it's so heartening to see their eyes sparkle when they see the possibilities 3/19

But sometimes there are parents who are worried about the career prospects for their child if they study something as abstract as astronomy.

So sometimes, I spend energy comforting the parents and showing them the plethora of opportunities a science degree can lead to. 4/19

The reason I think this is also a really important step in these interactions is because of the huge benefit that comes from having a supportive family.

It is so helpful to have an environment where your love of science (no matter how abstract) is cherished and encouraged 5/19

Back to #Astrofest2021. I had a parent approach me with their child who seemed VERY shy

I tried my usual approach of focusing on the student not the parent and encouraging them to speak to me but they physically hiding behind their parent and not responding in any way 6/19

Quickly it became very clear that they had both talked a lot about what they wanted to ask and the student was extremely uncomfortable with talking to strangers. The parent continued to ask me questions as a proxy for their child 7/19

I completely switched tactics and talked to the parent but as if I was speaking to the student who was listening to everything. I could see in the corner of my eye the smile on their face as I answer their questions and it honestly melted my heart 8/19

Towards the end of my chat, the parent asked me:

"And how is your workplace with welcoming neurodivergence?"

I cannot express to you how much I melted in that moment and almost started crying. 9/19

This parent knew exactly what their child needed for support and knew what they wanted to pursue. They were doing everything in their power to help them work to that goal but making sure they would be in a safe and welcoming environment. 10/19

It was so heartwarming to see a parent advocating so openly and proudly for what their child needed, making sure they would get it and still be able to achieve their goals.

Unfortunately, for neurodivergent people, this is really rare. 11/19

I explained that I had #ADHD and felt like @ICRAR and my colleagues have been incredibly helpful and accommodating with that. The parents first response:

"Oh! How are you going in this loud environment? Are you ok?"

12/19

Y'all.

I literally was holding back tears.

This stranger, was so well educated about #ADHD and neurodiversity that they were aware of how overwhelming crowded and loud environments can be and they wanted to make sure I was ok. That has never happened to me before 13/19

This interacted stayed with me all night. I have never been particularly bothered by big #STEM events like #Astrofest2021 but I started wondering why?

I realised it's because I switch on my "sci-comm persona" and turn into a different person when I present at these events. 14/19

Essentially, I start masking so strongly to cover my #ADHD that I can seem like a completely different person. In many ways, I think this can make me a great presenter, I can become a person who any audience can relate to because I can switch my persona to suit 15/19

But the consequence of doing this means I am completely exhausted after the event. Sometimes, a 1hour talk can deplete my energy so much it takes me days to recover
I'd never really connected why that was, I just assumed its because sci-comm is hard work and it's exhausting 16/10

Now I realise that a big part of it is the instinctual response I have to being in a neurotypical environment: presenting a different side of myself to become relatable to the audience and using energy to hide my natural self. 17/19

Moving forward, when I am doing scicomm, I am definitely going to try to mask less and become more comfortable with MY persona, not my scicomm one but it's definitely going to be a big journey. 18/19

This 1 interaction with a parent and their child has made such an impact on me. I hope I was able to help them as much as they have me. The support of this parent was unbelievably moving and I hope they understand just how incredible they are. 19/19