Thread by @youngestpeso

Ladies and Gamers, the second edition of my $ETH DeFi Tier List. Let me know if you disagree or what coins I should add to my next one. I have a thread explaining my reasoning for each pick. As always, this is financial advice. Let me know if you liked it :)

1inch tier: $SFI this thing is hot garbage shilled by the failed abortion known as @loganpaul. Who tf wants reduced risk in DeFi at the cost of lower yield get the fuck out here with your single-digit APR. I’m (3,3) in $OHM making more money than both of your parents. 10$ EOY

1inch tier: $SNX I'll be honest, I have no clue what it does, but the price is bad and Devs are NOT doing something except for bridging from $ETH to a ghost chain L2. @kaiynne even dumped his bag. @zhusu said it best, "bad price, bad project". 15 daily users says it all $3 EOY

1inch tier: $MTA is such a shitcoin even a $CRV gauge couldn't save it from dumping. @sassal0x, an advisor was breastfed soylent and never stopped drinking it. I would fade anyone looking like a clone of @IOHK_Charles. The Winklevoss twins dumped their MTA you should too. $1 EOY

1inch tier: $ZRX, my grandmother ships faster than 0x devs, she died years ago. The founder refuses to hire anyone smarter than him. Visiting their office is like going to the gorilla exhibit at the Bronx Zoo. Picture of their dev team hard at work attached .5$ EOY

C tier: $COMP, who wants to pay $100 to get a loan of $70 that's retarded. @rleshner has high blood pressure and dumps $COMP for real estate like a boomer. I think a career as a mall cop fits his build and intellect better, code is law and $COMP code is hot garbage $90 EOY

C tier: $CAKE is a fork of $UNI minus the balding dev. BSC is a Chinese ghost chain used to bait retail into giving money to Xi Jinping. The entertaining thing about $CAKE was seeing retail getting rugged for the first time. Cute logo though $8 EOY

C Tier: $MKR, Adam and Eve, shorted $MKR their first day on earth. Minting $DAI with $USDC is like wiping your ass with used toilet paper. Their founder is high and shitposts in the DAO like using Maker to solve climate change. If you prefer poverty if you hold $1K EOY

B Tier: $REN has a lot of good shit lined up, @tz gives me school shooter energy, bullish, sellers get shot IRL. With that said, $renBTC liquidity is shallower than a kiddy pool. Dark pools are good for tax evasion so expect a pump $2 EOY

B tier: $Alpha, these fuckers have a Chinese math Olympian working for them, got hacked, either it’s an inside job or he cheated to win. Tokenomics now support furies, bearish. @rookiexbt is still probably holding his long to this day, 42% staking APR is juicy though $1 EOY

A tier: $LDO, you earn yield by running a staking node on $ETH and then depositing your $stETH elsewhere. Liquidity for $stETH is drier than an African village. That doesn’t matter since it’s 2 @Cobie shills away from a 10x, don't fade that. Decent logo and based founder $5 EOY

A tier: $JOE, these fuckers took the grocery store soccer moms with ADHD kids shop at and turned it into a DeFi app, well played. I don’t know what kinds of shitcoins exist on the ghost chain $AVAX but it's bullish that you can only swap organic non-GMO certified shitcoins $4 EOY

S tier: $Link, Sergey has been taking dumps on me since 2019, I’m freaky and I like it. Chainlink is the most needed Ponzi in DeFi, don't fade that. When the financial cabal comes to take your $LINK, send them back to Epstein Island, children are for labor not molesting $100 EOY

S tier: $Spell, this Ponzi is what Maker should be, turn your shitcoins into dollars. They own more $CVX than the $CVX treasury at this point. @danielesesta is their navigator and I would kiss him on the mouth without protection. 1 Spell = 1 $MIM perfectly balanced #OccupyDeFi

S tier: $DPX, seed round buy, the best financial decision I ever made. Did a job interview with my dope shirt, I'm CEO now. They plan on controlling CVX without buying it which is like having sex with Riley Reid with a clean STD test. Fading @Tetranode is financial suicide 5k EOY

S tier: $Rook, All $ETH MEV extracted and redistribute to stakers, my PP hard. Do yourself a favor, buy a bag, take a Vicodin, and go to sleep for 10 years and wake up wealthier than @DeFiGod1. Devs are apex predators @Pai_sh0 (ex-NASA), @rookhog (ex-3AC), and @0x81B (ex-Google)

S tier: $BNT, is the @miakhalifa of DeFi, nobody takes liquidity better. V3 is imminent, and I will be depositing my liquidity in BNT’s tight pool RAW. Founders are based and $Link marines, bullish. Don’t fade the first AMM DEX, holding a bag will pay your kid's tuition $9 EOY