What was on display in this trial was the rebuttal, yet again, of the most common rape myths that cripple our societal response to abuse:
1. The idea that memories of abuse are easy to implant and frequently inaccurate or manufactured.
2. The oft-repeated trope that survivors come forward because they are motivated by money and fame.
3. An in - depth portrayal of how grooming and trafficking really happens, and why so many survivors don't "just fight back." This is a critical reality we need to understand.
4. And yet again, a painful reminder of what survivors face when they do speak up. This could have, and should have, been brought to light long ago. Had prosecutors and detectives done their job instead of shielding a powerful predator, the cost would not be so high.
The conviction is a powerful message, brought in large part by the survivors who fought for so long so be heard. But it is also a sharp reminder of how much work is left to be done.
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Josh Duggar has been found guilty on two counts of downloading and possessing CSAM. So much grief for the survivors, and for everyone caught in the cross hairs. Perhaps most disturbing however is how the patterns noted in this earlier post, played out...
Despite clear evidence, there was no grief at what was, but rather a continual effort to thwart justice and deny. From a family member who changed his testimony on the stand, to a father who "couldn't remember" the abuse of his own four daughters, to a wife who held his hand...
The focus continued to be the living out of the same twisted theology that led us here.
The situation for everyone is devastating, but acting as though this isn't serious only furthers the devastation.
What Anna needs is someone to validate how evil this is, and grieve with her
Ok first, what I said was "that the kids can decorate with their own ornaments" NOT "all by themselves". We have 4 kids, it can't be a TINY tree. I never envisioned a tree the kids could put the star on themselves and that's not what I said!
I am deeply thankful for the guilty verdict in the slaying of Ahmaud Arbery, but in this gratefulness, it's so critical to remember a few things:
1. Remember how close we came to no trial at all due to corrupt systems and authority figures. Justice was terrifyingly slow and it took far too much suffering and effort from Ahmaud's family, press, and other law enforcement, to get this. That is a terrifying reality.
2. Getting some measure of justice is often the exception, not the rule. This result was good. This does NOT mean the systems are changing/will continue to change, without constant effort and vigilance. Don't stop paying attention - let this spur you to pay MORE attention.
4 yrs ago today I was sitting in court hearing Larry plead guilty to possession of CSAM. The prosecutor read "how much is a little girl worth?" from my letter to the judge, asking for the maximum penalty. Judge Neff gave it. It was the best possible result, and yet...
The little girls in that material still live with it. None were in the courtroom that day to know that anyone even fought for them. I was allowed to write a letter speaking to the sentence because of my role in the assault cases, but I think about them nearly every day.
It was an incredible privilege to speak in any way on their behalf, but even in the best of results, the damage and grief is still there.
The last two weeks have been extra raw for me and I couldn't figure out why until FB reminded me of the date. The body keeps the score.
I am disappointed and grieved to say that this is not what survivors and advocates actually called for and not what LU needs. I hope that this is the result of a lack of understanding on the part of LU and that it will be rectified quickly.
While a Title IX review is not a bad step, most of the allegations and concerns do not relate to technical Title IX policy violations (some do, but not most).
The actual concerns and allegations primarily center around allegations of:
1. A culture that silences survivors and minimizes abuse.
2. Poor responses by faculty and leadership.
3. Resistance to reform by leadership.
4. Lack of good communication on abuse related issues.
5.Lack of awareness and priorization of these issues by leadership.
This article inadvertently plays a part in one of the major reasons, when it notes that sexual contact between Dr and patient is an ethical violation. As if what is described here is consensual contact that just breaches some ethics rules.
Yes, the ethics rules are important and yes there is always a power dynamic, that's why the rule is there.
But when predatory abusive and criminal behavior is flagged as wrong because of an ethics violation, it severely mischaracterizes the abuse and downplays needed response.