Thread by @GbengaWemimo

The worst heartbreak ever is the one you feel after you have gotten married to the wrong person.
The “right” person suddenly surfaces, with the right energy, right connection, true love and understanding
You ask yourself, what is going on here?
You say “Oh Lawd, keep me far from

temptation but then you realise it is not temptation
Whenever this person is around you, everything becomes brighter but in their absence, you’re not motivated to do anything, to become anything, to aspire or even dream
He or she gets your creative juices flowing, just by being

around such you’re making more money, coming up with absolutely inventive and outrageous ideas and concepts
There is good vibes all over you and you’re more of yourself
At first you just like the person’s company the. You guys get talking and you realise he or she is your soul

mate
But you are married
Your husband or wife has done nothing to provoke you or to make you unhappy
You’re not looking to cheat or be unfaithful
You are not even looking to become an emotional cheat
It is like the coming together of Solomon and the Queen of Sheba, a supernatural

fit
You know it will make your spouse uncomfortable but it is making you feel so young and giddy
You save his or her name under a code
You delete your chat records constantly
You talk on the phone for hours
You bond and then you fall in love
It was totally unplanned and unwanted

you find yourself addicted to him or her
There has been no crossing of the line physically but you have surrendered already in your mind
Your spouse is still the love of your life in a certain way but this person has not only taken a space in your heart, he or she has become a

very serious force that you cannot even imagine doing without
One day you say to him or her, I love you
Maybe at the airport on your way back to Lagos from Abuja where you have gone to do a conference
Maybe during a phone conversation
You said it
There was some silence
Then he or

she says it too
You realise at that point that you guys are officially cheating at that point
You overlook it
These things happen, you’re a big guy, you can handle it
You meet, nothing was awkward…
You said “Everything is as fine as it ought to be”
But the tension was building

You ignore
He or she ignores
Until you find yourselves in each other’s spaces and you kiss
You have officially crossed the line but instead of guilt, you feel excited
You begin to create time and space to be together while you cope with the demands for attention from your spouse

You thought you could manage it, juggle both and keep a straight face
Well, you become a cheat
You have tasted the kiss and it is only natural that things escalate in the right direction
You have been playing hide and seek with the serpent
Suddenly it bites
You’re happy and sad

at the same time
You’re cheating on your spouse, wrecking your own marriage and yet you can’t seem to breathe without this person
Your spouse became suspicious because you’re bonding with someone else and he or she can feel your inconsistency
You lied
It is my job, it is my that!

Yet you find time to go back to your lover, you drink of his or her pool and try very much to forget your life without him or her
You wish somehow you can be together but it is impossible
She wouldn’t be a second wife
He wouldn’t be a second husband
He says “I wish I had met you

before you got married
She says “I deserve better than this. I hate doing this to another woman, I told myself I will never find myself in this sort of place”
You console each other
The sex is always good but the guilt after is the devil
It hits you in waves, makes you feel

like a vampire!
You hate yourself when you pray
Your heart weeps when you look at your spouse, your children
They feel so distant even while you are with them
This is not the child your mother raised
This is not what you desire for yourself
You cry bitterly but you go back to him

or her
Walking away is unthinkable
Your heart hurts
It is ironic how poison had become so sweet
You know it will eventually come to an end but why not take at least one more day
You have sex and break up
You tell each other it is for the best and make up your mind it is over!

You get home and your fingers begin to itch
You want to say good bye or good morning or whatever
You touch your phone only to discover that he or she has blocked you
You panic
What!
You send a message, you call, you send a mail
It works
He or she picks and begins to cry
Oh my!

I can’t do this anymore
We shouldn’t be doing this
We know better
I hate seeing myself and what I am becoming
We should end this
You say “Can we talk about this?”
You meet
You kiss
He pushes you away
She turned her back
You kiss again
Sex again
You said it is farewell sex
But…

You’re back at it a week later
Handshake has become a python’s grip
Neither of you could let go
Eventually common sense prevails
He or she talks to a third party
Pressure came from everywhere
His wife, her husband, the church, friends, tears, shame
You break up
It was over!
Yet,

You hurt badly
Your heart weeps and weeps
You’re laid out flat on your back
Crying for your lost love
Burying it like an illegitimate child
You cannot talk about it or share it with a friend
You fall ill and begin to nurse yourself back to health
Heartbreak within a marriage
Hmm

Your husband or wife comes for kiss and touch
You push your pain aside and oblige him or her
You have to get this strange love out of your system
It wasn’t his touch, it wasn’t her breathe but you cope
What option do you have but to shake it off?
You’re grateful it was a glitch

Others did it and it ruined their lives
You got off with only a heartbreak
It is time to recover
Your fellowship with God has suffered the most
This illicit love caused you to shut everything out
You reopen that chapter again and promise yourself “Never Again”
You’re sure that if

you draw closer to God, such a temptation wouldn’t come your way again
You being to skabash, you join many prayer groups, you join Bible Reading forums, you pay more attention to your spouse, you pay more attention to your children
You have been made whole
But once in a while,

you remember him or her
You remember his or her touch
You try his phone number
You drive by her office
You remember his or her smile
You shiver at the sight of someone who looks like him or her
Or you come across him or her in real life and your knees shake or buckles!
Love is a

strange animal
You have seen it firsthand and you have come to learn the pitfalls

PS: It is not impossible to be in love with one and fall in love with another
You must however refuse the seed of lust to flourish in your heart
If you are in this situation right now, walk away!

Don’t be the married woman who keeps lovers just for fun
Don’t be the married man chasing skirts shamelessly
You have the option of remaining single so that you don’t drag others through emotional issues because of your conduct
Remember to do the right thing, do it now!