Thread by @visakanv

feeling kinda angry about the idea of successful nerds getting gatekept out of nerd communities upon becoming successful

my personal definition of a nerd: a nerd is someone who is driven by curiosity. the more of your behavior is driven/determined by curiosity, the bigger of a nerd you are

I think most nerds will broadly agree with me on this definition, but some nerds will include this additional component of "a nerd is someone who endures negative social consequences for being a nerd" – being bullied, ostracized, broke, romantically unsuccessful, etc etc

I do. I'm one of the best fucking community builders on the goddamn planet. I can make a community out of a box of scraps in a cave if I have to. I'm not angry for me. I'm angry for nerds who don't have the social skills to do what I do

https://twitter.com/imperative_the/status/1507109428444729358

and yea ok if I think about it a little more it turns out the the anger is really grief, because the injustice is perpetuated out of a sense of fear and scarcity mindedness, the cruelty is all so unnecessary, and it perpetuates cycles of victimhood, bullying, shame, suspicion

and ok zoom out a bit more and it's not just nerds, right, this is a pattern in all sorts of struggling communities that make their struggles a part of their identity, such that success becomes betrayal. I remember someone telling me about their story re: being formerly homeless

"you're too good for us, huh? you think you're better than us, huh?" – hurt, anxious, defensive people will say this preemptively, defensively, even at a person who's trying their best to be kind

https://twitter.com/visakanv/status/1064748620342161408

it's just all so sad.

lets try to be happy for the successes of our friends, and of our children, and not interpret it as a provocation directed at us

https://twitter.com/visakanv/status/1478180909199216640