To have extraordinarily long life with
-Sentence of life plus 1,092 years (eligible for parole in 874)
-Cellmate Pence reading the Bible at him every damned day
-No internet &
-No Twitter
-Only 1 hr of TV daily: MSNBC tuned to Maddow
How should Trump End 2/
(in prison)
Prison means
No cheeseburgers
No Diet Cokes
No orange makeup
No tanning booth
No long hair (That Thing that nests on his head will be shaved)
No Adderall
No Dexamethasone
He has a Covid vaccination, so no early release due to pandemic
No golf
The Trump end 3/
(in prison)
Prison means healthy food
Vegetables (I'd love to have them feed Goya beans to him every stinking day. The aroma in his prison cell would be epic)
Government provided free healthcare
No fake doctor notes
Regular check-ups
No phone calls to Hannity
The Trump Legacy 4/
Worst Lady #FLOTITS deported:
So no conjugal visits
Trump assets seized
Trump buildings become homeless centers
Trump golf courses into refugee campsites
& wind farms
Trump properties renamed after Obama, Hillary, Pelosi, McCain, Stormy, Vindman, Hutchinson
• • •
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So as the Biglier Trumpian Bible foretold, in the Book of Barr, that when the Italian satellites align with the Jewish space-based lasers... then the #PatsyBaloney cometh. On that glorious day, we greatly rejoice the Pat Cipollone
And all manner of legalistic miracles will occur
It was the Patsy Baloney Day Miracle
As the prophesies said, when Pat Cipollone appears:
Bannon's crooked attorney Robert & Abbott Costello admits to intimidating witnesses for Trump
Justice Kavanaugh can't eat in peace
Jeff Clark is caught without his pants
The third & final miracle of Patsy Baloney Day, when Pat Cipollone finally appears, was of course the bigliest miracle. This involved criminal & alleged human being Steve Bannon and his criminal & alleged attorney Robert & Abbott Costello (leftmost in photo)
So first, on Friday, we heard that Trump is tossing Bannon under the bus (good, this was inevitable; Trump will do this to everybody, but Bannon was quite close to Trump)
But we heard that Abbott & Robert Costello, Bannon's attorney wants to withdraw from representing Bannon
Where do we remember this name from? Abbott von Robert und Costello, esquire? Rudy Giuliani! This dude also represents Sir Buttdial McRudypants, America's Mayonaise
And THAT is where this gets 'fascinating'
[Your T Dawg raises Spock eye brow]
The second miracle promised when the Pat Cipollone appears, on Patsy Baloney Day, in front of the Congressional hearing, under oath - was of course Pat Cipollone
This you probably noticed Friday. But let's dig just a little bit deeper into this second miracle #PatsyBaloney
Patsy Baloney spoke for 8 hours, testified under oath, and did not invoke the 5th amendment
When Cassidy Hutchinson testified in public, she said Pat Cipollone (Trump White House Councel) had warned Trump what Trump wanted to do was illegal. Pat said this in front of witnesses
Because we know that Trump did it anyway, since White House's chief councel, Pat Cipollone warned Trump what he is attempting is criminal - this SEALS the deal, Trump will be CONVICTED of this crime (when we get to his turn, remember, have patience, this takes still a long time)
Like the Three Wise Men of old(e), we too were served THREE legalistic miracles on this blessed Patsy Baloney Day. The Pat Cipollone arrived and so did the promised miracles, bigly.
(as opposed to failed bouncer Trump once employed as a bodyguard, Big Lee)
First up: Jeff Clark
So the Miracle of Worldwide Pants got us to Jeff Clark. Note, this man is so crooked, Trump wanted Clark to be acting Attorney General, when Trump felt Bill Barr had not been corrupt ENOUGH
No doubt this dude is left literally standing without his pants
The video we saw of former Department of Justice attorney and junior level department head, utterly corrupt attorney Jeff Clark, was not from Friday. It was hot in late June when FBI raided his home and took his phones. The video was just now released, Friday. So we knew of this
Las Vegas oddsmakers have issued fresh odds for all the potential flippers in the nation's biggest picnick, patriotism, insurrection, terrorism & hanging party hosted by the Republicans in Washington DC. Our beloved tradition: Grand Flippathon
Perennial Magafavorite flipper is notorious serial butt-dialer & alleged attorney Rudy Giuliani, the Grand Duke of Four Seasons Total Landscaping (parking lot). Rudy Colludy has confessed his crimes on live video, so he is utterly screwed. He has to flip
Flippathon Thread 3/
As America's Maynaise turned America's Vampire is former Federal prosecutor who sent Mafia killers to life in prison, he is in mortal danger inside any federal housing. He will spend his prison time in solitary confinement. He had begged Trump for a pardon