My daughter was 5.

Recovering from open heart surgery.

Tentatively walking up the corridor, she met a nurse.

"Come in here," she said.
"I want to show you something."

The nurse led us into the quiet room
That room on every ward with a box of tissues & a picture on the wall...
A tightness in my chest.

So many families whose lives I had changed with bad news broken in rooms like this...

"Come to the window", said Emma, the nurse with a smile.

My daughter tottered over slowly.

I saw it before she did...
The city shone from down below.
An expanse of lights in the darkness.

Emma carefully lifted my daughter & stood her on the sofa so she could see over the windowsill.

Silence...

A quiet moment of wonder.

"Wow..!" she whispered.
We stood there for a few minutes, my daughter, Emma and I.

As I wiped a tear from the corner of my eye, Emma leaned towards me.

"She's going to be ok", she said.
2 yrs later, whenever we see the illuminated city at night,

my daughter remembers her surgery.

She doesn't remember pain or fear.

Instead, she remembers Emma.

Emma and the night sky.

Nurses are incredible.
#Nursing #NHS

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More from @doc_bipolar

Mar 12
I was a children's doctor.

He was 7, maybe 8.
Full of smiles.

I'd looked after him for months.

Grown to care.

I told him I was going on maternity leave, that I'd see him next year.

A couple of months later

I was in a car park with my new baby

and I got a call...

🧵👇
It was my registrar.

"Hi, sorry to call you out of the blue but I wanted you to know something..."

Silence.

"He got sick. Really sick.
They did everything but...

He didn't make it"

My eyes filled with tears

"I know how much he meant to you.
I thought you deserved to know."
I put the phone down and cried.

In the middle of a car park,

I cried for him, for his family,

And I cried for me.

Because as health professionals, we grieve the loss of our patients,

We just don't talk about it.
Read 5 tweets
Jan 21
I was a children's doctor.

Then I became a primary teacher.

Overwhelmed & unsure of myself, I felt like I was drowning.

But the children kept me going

6-yr-olds who taught me to be a better person.

Their stories will warm your heart: 🧵👇
1. Joseph was 6.

An anxious boy who'd cry coming into school. He often complained of abdominal pain which settled with gentle reassurance.

He had a lot going on at home. I talked to him about it when I could.

And then one day something happened that I didn't expect...
We'd been working on handwriting
Then one day, he just 'got it'.

I celebrated his perseverance, his effort & determination with the class

And the confidence he gained from it was incredible

That one small thing I did changed his world.

He never cried again coming into school
Read 10 tweets
Jan 14
2 yrs ago today,

my daughter had open heart surgery.

She was 5.

As a paediatrician, I felt helpless

As a mum, I was terrified.

One thing happened that day, one thing the anaesthetic team did that I will never forget... 👇🧵
They sang...

My daughter had been given a pre med. She was giggly & now oblivious to the imminent surgery.

She lay on my lap as we were wheeled to theatre. I bit my lip. An attempt to hold it together... this was not the time to cry.

Then she started to sing...
It was a delirious version of frozen to begin with.

With a wobbly voice, I joined in.

And one by one, the play therapist, anesthetist, ODP and nurse did too.

My heart filled.
And in that moment, as we went down the hospital corridor, I felt safe.
Read 7 tweets
Jan 12
I was a paediatric trainee.

Then burnout and mental illness happened.

My educational supervisor was brilliant.

Here are the top 3 things that helped: 👇🧵

#MedTwitter
1. Time

In her busy consultant schedule, my supervisor made time for me. I could drop by her office to catch up without it having to be a formal meeting.

In and amongst the overwhelm, she helped me feel safe.

Not every meeting has to be form filling.
2. Listening without fixing

Often as doctors we want to make things better.
My supervisor knew when to simply listen, without the need to jump straight in and problem solve.

I knew she wanted to understand and so felt seen.

Sometimes, just being there is enough.
Read 5 tweets
Dec 29, 2022
My daughter had open heart surgery.

She was 5.

The care was fantastic

but one small thing left her traumatised.

This is it... 👇🧵
1. Ignoring the child

She was not long out of intensive care. A surgical doctor arrived & and told me he was going to remove her drains. He turned around, gathered his things then returned immediately, approaching her with a scalpel blade.
2. Lying

With no explanation of what he was doing he said:
"If you want to go home, then be a good girl and count to 3."

Obligingly, she quietly counted to three before crying out in pain as he yanked out the drain.
Read 7 tweets
Dec 28, 2022
I was a doctor.
3 yrs ago I retrained as a primary teacher.

Here are 3 things I learnt from being a class teacher that make me a better doctor.
👇🧵
1. Snap shot

As doctors we see a snap shot of patients' lives. We make assumptions & plans that we expect patients to follow.

As a teacher, I saw the reality of families' lives. I realised how unrealistic some of our requests are.

Ask yourself, is this plan really achievable?
2. DNA

Children are dependent on adults. When they arrive late at school, I don't judge. I enquire. What can I do to help?

As doctors, we still use "Did Not Attend" for missed clinic appointments: Judgement. Criticism

Instead, ask yourself what has prevented them from coming?
Read 5 tweets

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