Ingenuous Firebrand ๐Ÿ† Profile picture
May 2 โ€ข 19 tweets โ€ข 5 min read Twitter logo Read on Twitter
Last night was the #MetGala, so you know what time it is. LFG! Image
This type of pandering in an attempt to avoid the thread will not be tolerated. F- Image
Are we sure this guy should be allowed around baby Yoda? Image
Wow this dude is tall - he should play basketball Image
The back of this crossword puzzle dress is entirely racial slurs Image
Get a bigger collar, COWARZ Image
Harry Potter and the Secret Cry for Help Image
The stylist was like, โ€œgay silver surferโ€ Image
Imagine someone styling this and then says WAIT, WE NEED A FAN Image
The Blackula reboot looks terrible tbh Image
Casper the Uncomfortably Friendly Ghost Image
Tweedledumb Image
These two just opened a mid-priced hair salon in your city Image
Congrats on your gay marriage.

This is a good time to note that the token red carpet cross-dresser will not be part of these threads going forward. They arenโ€™t shocking anyone Image
Lolol wtaf meow meow hard pass Image
Give me something that screams โ€œearly 80s synth band memberโ€ Image
OKAYEST DRESSED:

You did okay, and I hope someone reads this to you Image
BEST DRESSED, ALMOST:

Dress is great, but then your stylist realized you โ€œneededโ€ the black ribbon Image
BEST DRESSED:

Look if Barbie is there, sheโ€™s going to win okay Image

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More from @ING2Firebrand

Jul 19, 2022
Give this dog a twitter bio with
โœŠ๐Ÿฟ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‘จโ€โค๏ธโ€๐Ÿ’‹โ€๐Ÿ‘จ and it has 50,000 followers within a month
Read 10 tweets
Oct 21, 2021
For every 10 likes this gets, Iโ€™ll make Charlie Kirkโ€™s face smaller Image
Image
Image
Read 23 tweets
Oct 20, 2021
If youโ€™re too dumb to pick out Halloween candy, here are the acceptable options:
Here are some things trick-or-treaters DO NOT want:

๐ŸŽƒ coins
๐ŸŽƒ toothbrush
๐ŸŽƒ homemade stuff
๐ŸŽƒ apple slices
๐ŸŽƒ anything labeled โ€œorganicโ€
๐ŸŽƒ chips or pretzels
๐ŸŽƒ anything healthy
๐ŸŽƒ little plastic toys
๐ŸŽƒ spider rings
๐ŸŽƒ easter candy
Here are some things trick-or-treaters DO want:

๐ŸŽƒ candy
๐ŸŽƒ coupons for free food at @ChickfilA
๐ŸŽƒ temporary tattoos (maybe)

Thatโ€™s it - thatโ€™s the whole list
Read 4 tweets
Nov 25, 2020
Since twitter suspended @INGFirebrand for excessive Batdancing, Iโ€™ll have to retell the story of the first Thanksgiving. This is the real story, not the BS the liberal mainstream media puts out there every year. THE TRUTH.

1/
It all started upon arrival to the New World, when the pilgrims encountered an enemy they hadnโ€™t anticipated. Not disease or Native Americans...

2/
But dinosaurs. Many, many dinosaurs. In fact, half of the arriving pilgrims were eaten within 15 minutes of landfall.

3/
Read 10 tweets
Nov 23, 2020
Last nightโ€™s AMAs really brought out some fashion mistakes. Letโ€™s gooooooooooooooo Image
Ftw you cosplay David Bowie but switch to Prince halfway through Image
Velour, yโ€™all Image
Read 8 tweets

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