Harpreet Profile picture
Apr 10, 2019 39 tweets 11 min read
1
So folks, sharing some thoughts on the recent spate of statements and counter statements on the Paki F-16 that was shot down by Wing Commander Abhinandan Varthaman.
I know its a bit late in the day, but what to do, I was mighty busy through the last 10 odd days!
Here goes ..
2
It all began on the last Jumma Day on 5th April.
After his weekly Jumma bath, the Brown Pants Propagandu-in-Chief started his PropaganduOfTheDay with the national motto of the Republic of India - सत्यमेव जयते.
Oh, only if he knew what was to follow!
3
Not to be outdone, the Beggar-in-Chief followed soon.
By soon, I mean a day later, because presumably, it took him about 24 hours to get rid of his Jumma 'High'.
Being too tired, he too stole the सत्यमेव जयते part from the Propagandu-in-Chief's tweet, though.
4
So, what exactly had happened, you ask?
Well, a Gori Memsaab had written a piece in a Western publication, no less, that Beggaristan's American masters had come to take a quick count up of Paki F-16s and declared that all were intact!
5
So 'excited' was the Propagandu-in-Chief, that he took a bit longer than usual in his weekly Jumma shower bath and almost yelled out MARTIALLAW as he 'finished'!
Thankfully, he quickly corrected himself and yelled सत्यमेव जयते instead!
(No pun intended, Sachchi!)
6
BUTT .. he thought as he 'finished' ..
Oh, well, I digress. He and his shower 'thoughts' are none of our business!
Coming back to the topic, the Gori Mem endorsing the Brown Pants was a BIG deal indeed!
7
In the midst of all this 'excitement' early on a Jumma Din, there was a 'slight' oversight by Shri Propagandu-in-Chief.
The Gori Mem had based her entire 'scoop' on unnamed 'sources' from the power circles in the US of A!
8
Heck, even Baskin Robbins guys could produce better 'scoops' than this one.
And what's more, their 'scoops' would be quite tasteful to the palate than the $hit that the Gori Mem managed to scoop and fling, to much cheering by Brown Pants, for obvious reasons!
9
So here was the deal - a Gori Mem citing unknown 'sources' Vs a Two Star officer of Indian Air Force OFFICIALLY confirming an F-16 claim.
Hmm .. difficult choice, no?
Answer: NO!
As far as the Brown Panted ones go, Gori Chamdi wins.
Always & Every Time.
Esp, when flinging Shit!
10
Just to refresh you all, here is what the IAF officially acknowledged in its presser right after Wing Commander Abhinandan shot down the Paki F-16.
11
Of course, there was the little, 'uncomfortable' fact that the Pakis themselves had admitted to losing one of their own aircraft in that short but epic engagement over the lands of Kashyap Mir, better known as Kashmir today.
Here is how it went.
12
Soon after the engagement, the Pakis were exhilirated.
TWO AIRCRAFT SHOT DOWN!
THREE PILOTS CAPTURED!
YAHOO!
No one thought to confirm whom those aircraft belonged to.
Typical of the 'quick shot' Propagandu-in-Chief, he let one out .. err .. prematurely .. yet again!
13
After a while, there was time for an update to be given to Shri Propagandu-in-Chief.
But who would dare do it, since it would expose his proclivity for premature .. err .. whatever .. in front of the whole world?
His little Brown Panted minions went into a huddle.
14
Soon, the inevitable happened.
The Propagandu-in-Chief left for his afternoon potty.
NOW was the time to tell him, the minions decided.
"Err .. Saheb .. there is a breaking news regarding the air battle .. one of the captured pilots is our own", they shouted from outside his..
15
.. latrine door and ran away before he could pull up his pants!
He grumbled a few 'jumma eve compliant' expletives and quickly rushed out, his potty business only half done.
'Damn those idiot minions', he grumbled, 'if only they weren't so gorgeous ..'
16
A quick few phone calls later, he had the entire 'free' media of Beggaristan outside his office.
There are only TWO Indian pilots, he said, including one in hospital.
Not one of the 'free' Paki pressmen asked, लेकिन जनाब, सुबह तो तीन पायलट थे!
🙄
17
But then again, in the spirit of सत्यमेव जयते, later in the day, someone updated him again.
Janab, wo hospital wala bhi apna hee hai.

DAMMIT, he croaked, his throat parched, YE TO GHANI WALI DE-PANTING HO GAYI AAJ!
18
But there was a job to be done.
Like the true Brown Panted Soldier that he was, he tightened his belt, applied his makeup, and went online again.
Jee ek hee pilot hai hamare paas!
19
Even as he said this, he let out a silent curse on the unwashed 'citizens' of 'azad' Kashmir for beating the two Paki pilots to death.
Not just that, they had also gone on record saying that there were a total of 2 planes and 3 pilots that came down!
20
But then, he wasn't the Propagandu-in-Chief for nothing!
He decided to counter the uncomfortable truth by simply ignoring it!
No F-16s were used, he croaked next.
Oh, btw, the Indians had recently purchased a used AMRAAM from OLX!
Sachchi!
21
Phew, too much 'excitement' and propagandu for one day, he thought as he changed into his silky pyjamas at night and went to bed, smartphone in one hand.
His other hand is well .. none of our business, to be frank.
22
Things went on and on over the next few days and weeks, but the Propagandu-in-Chief had a genuine doubt in his mind - DID THAT IDIOT PAF CHIEF BETRAY THE BROWN PANTS BY HOLDING BACK THE INFO OF LOSS OF HIS F-16 AND HIS PILOTS FOR SO LONG?

But well, saannu ki!
😈
23
He already had a TRUMP Card up his sleeve.
No not Shri Donald Trump who is actually quite annoyed with the Brown Pants, but that Gori Mem and her 'unnamed' 'sources'!
Until, the Pentagon punctured his wet dream!
dnaindia.com/india/photo-ga…
24
But trust the 'free' Beggaristani media not to question any of this.
They'd rather collectively orgasm at the thought of endorsement of their 'stand' by a Gori Mem!
As for the Paki Awam, well I'll just leave this blog post here for you all to judge!
cestmoizblog.wordpress.com/2017/08/19/sta…
25
Just in case you are exasperated by the Propagandu-in-Chief's blatant propagandu, just remember the lineage that he comes from!
His exalted predecessors published this ONE DAY AFTER the surrender in East Pakistan!
26
Then, right after the 1971 war, was the fantastic Paki claim that India was lying that they had shot down a few of their brand new Mirage fighters!
Heck, to prove their 'claim', they lined up ALL 24 of their Mirages for the entire world to see.
It almost worked!
27
ALMOST, because soon thereafter came the French who said that the Pakis had, in fact, taken deliveries of 28 Mirages!
Not that the Jordanians were asking - Oye hamare Mirage kahan gaye jo tum saalon ko loan pe diye the ladai ke liye!
28
Beggaristan, folks is a country which is based on a bunch of lies!
Lies, that have sustained it because no one found it worth their time to question them!
Until now, that is!
This is a country which still believes it won the 1947-48 war.
And get's its propagandu poster wrong!
29
It still claims that it won the Kargil war, but won't tell you how!
It still claims that no regular troops of its Brown Panted Army participated in the Kargil War, but won't tell you that it awarded a Nishan e Haider to Capt Kamal Sher on recommendation of the Indian Army!
30
It is a country ruled .. nay .. OWNED by its Brown Panted Army, who believe boom and bluster is a viable substitute for valour on battlefield.
Here's a video which describes this hubris the best!
Vinaash Kaale Vipreet Buddhi
Yahya Khan on East Pakistan
31
BUTT .. coming back to the Propagandu-in-Chief, seeing that he was on a sticky wicket (Once again, no pun intended!), he also laid out the missiles recovered from the Indian MiG21 debris.
All seekers are intact, he crooned!
32
Even while he was typing in his next tweet saying 'WE WON, 😛', came the reply by a veteran Indian Fighter Pilot, @Chopsyturvey, bursting his pretty little bubble!
His air force had trolled the Propagandu-in-Chief yet again by not telling him that atleast two of the missiles..
33
.. had their warheads missing, i.e. they had exploded near their targets!
DAMN YOU BLODDY FIZZLE YA, he silently cursed them once again!
In order to quickly move on, he directed the the loudmouth Foreign Minister, to cry, Hindustan hum pe hamla karne wala hai. Ye rahi tareekh!
34
Ok, folks, I interrupt this thread to welcome my first Paki.
He is a perfect example of what I mentioned in Tweet 24 of this thread - WILL NEVER QUESTION THE OFFICIAL PROPAGANDU!
He's been muted, btw, so pl refrain from tagging me in case you engage him
35
So back to the thread, the loudmouthed one's crying wolf was met with justified ridicule and a tersely worded statement by a bureaucrat in the Indian MEA.
This threat, masked as a cry for help, too had been dealt with appropriately.
36
I wind up this thread with a hat tip to Sqn Leader MM Alam who claimed to have shot down five Indian jets in 28 seconds in 1965.
His claims were taken at face value and he became an overnight hero, one used even today to remind Indians how AWESOME the PAF is!
37
Yet, one wonders why no one talks about the dozens of Indian aircraft he would have shot down in 1971.
Truth of the matter is that he wasn't allowed to even fly in 1971!
Btw, I'll leave this piece here without any further comment
Do read it!
bharat-rakshak.com/IAF/History/19…
38
I think I've said enough. As I end this thread, let me run a poll about Shri Asif Ghafoor Ji and what name suits him the best, even though I've been partial to 'Propagandu-in-Chief'.
Do vote and share on, folks!
39/39
Thank you for your patience, folks.
I end this thread with the words I said before - सत्यमेव जयते.
Oh btw, this 👇 is what happened in the middle of all this propagandu warfare!
Jai Hind!

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More from @CestMoiz

Feb 20
:Thread:
Dear Shri @Twi77zler Ji from Erstwhile West Pakistan, I know I and my own Nation are far from perfect. But to hear about treatment of minorities from a Bhikharistani, of all peoples in this world, still made me do an actual Facepalm.
Let me enlighten you why.
🙏
But dear Shri @Twi77zler Ji, before moving ahead, let me just inform you that I'm putting your handle on mute because I am really not interested in whatever crap you have to spew.
Talking about crap, I'll just leave this thread here to keep u 'entertained'
Now back to the Facepalm moment. For that I will need to acquaint you with your beloved Bhikharistan's constitution which explicitly BARS minorities from the highest offices of the lands.
Here is what it says about qualifications to be the PM and the President of Bhikharistan
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Well Played, @HyundaiIndia!
I'm sure the higher ups of @Hyundai_Global must be mighty impressed at your prowess in going into hiding!
Atleast one thing I know for sure as far as my next car goes - It will NOT be a Hyundai!
Cheers!
Looks like this poorly photoshopped photo of Shri @iamsrk ji in front of some @HyundaiIndia product is going to be in circulation for much much longer than it would have been under normal circumstances, thanks to the brand that he endorses, endorsing Pakistan in return!
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Disclaimer: This 'funny' video is in no way related to the top folks of @Hyundai_Global handing over control of their @HyundaiIndia and @Pakistan_Hyundai operations, including social media, to a bunch of nincompoop monkeys!
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#BoycottHyundai
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Jan 15
Army of the Islamic Republic of Pakistan doing a dance that would make the patrons of Heera Mandi proud!
Some mighty frustrated folks, these, I must say!
🤣
This reply to the tweet above reminded me of something that I had seen some time ago. Let me share it with you all!
Here it is. A short news report.
Gives some more perspective to the above comment.
Totally worth the 77 seconds of your life that it asks for. But if you don't have even that much to spare, just watch the last 5 seconds!
Totally worth it.
I promise!
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Read 8 tweets
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1/5
Today is the 261st anniversary of the Third Battle of Panipat.
Ahmed Shah Durrani would defeat the Marathas in a series of battles over next few days Image
2/5
However, own losses would force Durrani to sue for peace soon thereafter.
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Photo: Third Battle of Panipat, 14 Jan 1761, Hafiz Rahmat Khan, standing right of Ahmad Shah Durrani, who is shown sitting on a brown horse Image
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Welcome to Social Media!
Where a non-existent controversy / outrage is just one photoshop / filter away!!
Jai Ho!!
Iss hafte ke liye yehi sahi. Weekend par pata nahi kaun sa naya controversy aa jayega!
Btw, Photoshop is the forte of the Brown Panted Ones.
#JustSaying
Don't believe me?
Well try and find the torso of the Brown Panted One standing next to the lady receiving her medal 🤣
Here's another Brown Panted Warrior with a MAGICAL Rifle - One that looks like the bastard child of two different rifles, but casts the shadow of something else altogether!!
Read 5 tweets
Jan 9
Dear @defence_pk Ji, thanks for your QT.
I concede on the point of the variant of the IL-78 of PAF.
But I do admire you for the 'What You Smoke' wala point. It is pretty .. err .. 'neat', coming from someone like you!
Allow me to take some time to elaborate upon this point 🙏
I understand that your handle is affiliated with the Pakistan Defence website, or defence.pk, as mentioned in your twitter bio as well. Of course, I would know, since that has been my 'go to' place whenever I find myself in need of some quality entertainment!
So I went there again today!
And guess what I found - people smoking some of the best stuff that there is to be found!
And not just smoke, but grow it as well so that Bhikharistan can stop begging for alms ASAP!
Yup, this member wants to grow opium for the good of the world!
Read 62 tweets

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