Thread by @IanDunt

I've been feeling chill and quite contented recently, and I have only just realised it is because I hadn't heard Theresa May for a while parliamentlive.tv/Event/Index/95…

I like her glasses. Bernard Jenkins too. Hilary Benn's are shit. Maybe your glasses game is inversely proportionate to your credibility on Brexit.

"We will publish the withdrawal agreement bill when we have completed the work we are doing on the withdrawal agreement bill." Sure, Theresa, sure.

The truth about this, btw, is that No.10 knows that when that bill is published, people are going to lose their shit.

I mean, the only plus point here is that all the right people - May, Cash, Jenkins - look glum as fuck and hate each other.

Cash is talking about constitutional castration.

Interesting. May asked if she would ever leave without a deal. She dodges by saying parliament would never allow it. Basically confirms No.10 has given up on ever trying.

Cooper asking of PM rules out common external tariff. May replies talking about an independent trade policy. Says some of that is about services, but says "ability to vary tariffs is an important part of that".

Sounds like very little budging from May on customs union.

She's leaning heavily on the customs partnership stuff from Chequers but accepts that "in the political declaration this element has not been agreed."

Quite a few rumours flying around about Labour and the Tories being close to a deal, but you don't get that sense from May at all. She hasn't changed a word from Chequers.

Cooper: "Has nothing changed?"

May: "We are sitting down and talking with the opposition about what both sides want to achieve in relations to customs."

Cooper: "Common external tariff. In or out."

May: "You're asking me about the common external tariff...."

You can imagine the rest.

"You ask what the evidence is on compromise..."

Despairing habit the PM has of starting every sentence by stating what the subject was, and then proceeding not to address it.

One day, one fine day, I will never have to listen to Theresa May again. And no mater what the context - even if the next person, as seems likely, is even more dreadful - I look forward to it.

Morgan: "If there was to be success in cross-party talks would the govt prepare an updated economic analysis?"

May talks for one minute.

Morgan: "Thank you. Sorry, could you just clarify prime minister, does that mean that you would publish a revised economic assessment?"

Fucking god. I honestly don't know if I should have taken fewer drugs or more.

How long has it been? An hour? Not a single meaningful answer. And as I typed that, the prime minister said "I have been very clear".