Thread by @Gautaamm

There has been enough written about #H1Bvisas and #US2India. I am going to share a few words about how we made the move.

The reason was very clear: We wanted to be closer to family, specifically both sets of parents. We felt we owed it to our children to grow up around

grandparents. We also wanted to be with them as they headed into "old age" thought none of the 4 are anywhere close by any means.

The thinking and planning started a year ago.

The first concrete step was making a concrete decision that this was a one way move. By not giving

ourselves even the option of returning to the US, we ensured all "problems" like traffic, pollution, population etc are mere adjustments and not deterrents to settling down in Pune.

The next step was to make a commitment that we wanted to live close to parents. NOT by

ourselves. That was key for us otherwise the move made less sense.

We put our house on the market and it was sold within the hour. That helped a lot because it got the ball rolling. We had not been able to decide what was the first step we should take.

We wanted to be back

in India for Diwali of 2018. My child was going to start kindergarten in August. How do we help her understand this move?

So we told her "There is a special prize if you are polite and well behaved. You get chosen to go to school in your parents home town."

She was sold!

She did go and tell her teacher about this "Prize" and the teacher made an emergency call to us to ask what that was all about.

We had to to inform the practices we were part of to enable smooth transition to the replacement dentists. Both practices were thrilled for us and

not happy to lose us. But both of them told us repeatedly that should this not work out, the door was always open for both of us.

We did not have the heart to tell them there was no chance of that happening.

I had started looking up "Moving from US to India"

These two articles caught our eye:

huffingtonpost.in/shilpa-godbole…

qz.com/india/918328/i…

Check out the names of the individuals who wrote them. they are pretty famous on this platform.

This article could practically be about me personally:

medium.com/@selfishaltrui…

On the professional front, I was blessed to be able to join my father in his practice. But anyone who has worked with their father will understand it has it's own challenges.

So I told myself to approach it like a JOB. That has definitely helped.

The main reason I knew we

were going to be settling down just fine came in the form of a condition my wife put before me.

She said she plans to take a break for a year from work and settle the kids down first.

I am not going to get into this too much other than saying, this made our move SO EASY!

Once all these issues were clearly discussed and addressed, the rest were mere formalities.

All household items, cars etc were sold. Netflix and Comcast accounts closed.

Informing friends was very tough. When you live in the US, specially after having kids, your friends

become your family and you become theirs.

It is very tough to see a close family just pack up and leave.

We had some friends move to Dubai and we took a long time to get used to them not being around. So now we knew what our friends were going through.

The reaction was amazing. There were some who told us to our face we need to see a shrink. Well meaning of course. But they were in the minority.

Majority of the folks told us "We were in your shoes 10 years ago. We chickened out at the last minute. Do yourself and your family

a favor. Don't back out. Go back. You will be happy. Your parents will be ecstatic"

This reassurance and support helped a lot.

Farewells were planned. Lots of laughs. Lots of tears.

My wife planned an amazing trip to Disney for us. It was an amazing week we spent down there.

Around a month before our move, I asked my wife "What is going to be the one regret you are going to have once we leave?"

She said "Not having seen a Broadway show!".

So I sent her to see the Lion King with a friend for her birthday. Till date, she appreciates it and says how

she literally has NO regrets once she saw the show.

En route from Manhattan after the show, she messaged me saying "Ok your turn. Start looking for an AirBnB in Manhattan".

She knew I had always wanted to live in Manhattan but we never did.

So we found this amazing Penthouse

near Times Square on the 67th floor. I will never forget the view from the bedroom window of the city.

We stayed there the last 4 days. We went to all parks. I took my daughter to get a bagel for breakfast everyday and told her "In Pune, we can walk to Santosh Bakery like this"

Her exact words were "Really? Then I cannot wait to move back to Pune."

We landed in Pune on 3rd November, 2018. One day before Diwali.

We have been so happy to have moved back. The patients are happy. I am happy. The kids and their grandparents are over the moon.

A close friend gave me excellent advice. He said take two papers. Write down "This is how we used to do it in the US" on one and on the other write "This is how we used to do it in Pune."

Shred the first one the moment that flight takes off from JFK and the 2nd one just before

you land in Pune.

I actually did it and am convinced it helped.

I have seen that too many Indians move to the US and try to recreate their Indian life there and that makes them miserable.

Similarly, I have seen some Indians move back to India but try to recreate their US

life here. They have moved back within a year to the US.

I had decided to start our new life in Pune the right way.And I ensured it was executed.

We landed at 5.00 AM or so. This was our first breakfast at 7.00 AM!

As more and more people are considering moving back to India, I would strongly encourage everyone to think about it. Do it before the kids start school there.

When you come here, for the first year, live with parents.

Don't come back with pre-conceived notions.

Just Do IT!

CC:@NupurDaveAuthor @godbole_shilpa Both of you figure in this thread.

CC: @abhijitathavale