Thread by @uzbadyubi

ALREET PALS, tonight we're gonna watch Howl's Moving Castle for #YubiViews!

Now some of ye may know that I actually lived in Japan for a while and hold 2 whole degrees in Japanese language, a bachelors and a masters! I've seen a lot of Ghibli movie, but never this one.

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I don't really have a good reason why? But I've been since told it's also a book??? No idea what happens in it. I guess there's a guy called Howl (excellent name). I guess his castle moved. Did he move with his castle? Are we castle hunting? Is this all -

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an extended metaphor for human destruction of wildlife and the rapidly diminishing experience of childhood in an increasingly lonely and disconnected world, Miyazaki-san???

Also if the castle moves rapidly and unpredictably, i will be scared of it. Just saying.

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I do know the music is most likely going to be a bop though, and I might cry at it.

LET'S GO!

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i am immediately Mildly Disturbed by its movements, but not totally terrified.

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Hauru no ugoku shiro! Howl's Moving Castle!

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Ooh! We've got a main character! Sophie! And she's a milliner! Okay so we've got soldiers, we've got people who find the castle totally acceptable...

I always love the blend of Edwardian style with like, steampunk-esque fantasy ;w;

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oh jeez we've got a big ole military parade huh

lots of cheering and uniforms and crowds waving flags.

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if you so much as lay a hand on her i will personally rip you apart pixel by pixel mr solider man

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"She's even cuter when she's mad"

I WILL GODDAMN END YOU.

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oh we have a fancy lad with a voice actor i definitely recognise from somewhere

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UH OH

HOLD IN IS THIS GUY HOWL?

DON'T LIKE THE FUCKIN KINGDOM HEARTS THINGIES BEHIND THEM

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THIS HAS TO BE HOWL UNLESS THERE'S THIS FANCY FLYING MAN AND THEN SOMEONE ELSE WITH A NAME LIKE HOWL

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i'm annoyingly into this fancy and beautiful flying man

please don't be a bastard

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Lettie let's not call anyone out okay listen, he had an earring, he said we were good at flying, let's not be judgemental here, okay?

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"Don't worry. Howl's only after beauties."

1) you're beautiful, Sophie.
2) HOWL'S A FUCK BOY??? NOOOooooo goddamn it

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Deeply adore the choice to keep 'onee-chan' as Sophie in the subtitles, even if views will hear people aren't saying Sophie. Good translation choice IMO!!!

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I SWEAR TO GOD IF HOWL IS BEAUTIFUL AND SAD AND LONELY AND ALSO A BIT OF A BASTARD I'M GOING TO SUE EVERY ONE OF YOU WHO VOTED FOR THIS. I DON'T NEED ANY MORE ANIME BOYS IN MY HEART.

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okay this person in the black fur cloak tho what is HAPPENING

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WOW OKAY JESUS

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WAIT WHAT WITCH OF THE WASTES!?

SPELL?!

REGARDS TO HOWL?! WHAT DID SHE DO?!

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... oh my god

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Ooh. Translated "nandemo nai" to "I'll be fine." Interesting choice... I like it a lot!

also her boss (?) being like "WOW YOU SOUND LIKE SHIT. LIKE VERY OLD. WOW." kjsdkjdkjsdkjs

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oh my god... she's packing her cheese in her bag and leaving... lil ole sophie...

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OH SHE'S SO LOVELY AND SHE MAKES ME THINK OF MY GRANDMA I'M GOING TO CRY

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oh my god the stick was a scarecrow dfkjdkjdkj

OH GOD IT'S FOLLOWING HER

OH NO I HATE IT

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wait i rescind my immediately judgement and apologise, it brought her a good cane and now it's leaving

a good scarecrow.

this big sky whale battleship, however...

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OH GOD DON'T RUN HER OVER

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dear god i feel motion sick even looking at the inside of it moving

THIS IS VERY COOL THOUGH

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this is like when 20yr olds complain about being old SOPHIE YOU'VE BEEN OLD FOR ONE DAY

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oh my god the fire has eyes

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THE FIRE SPEAKS ALSO

Calcifer!? Good name!!!!

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My grandma also falls asleep sometimes when I talk to her, so I identify with Calcifer like, a lot.

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this is a set up to a fantastic ttrpg encounter

think he sells bowties with extra flair?

34/-

OKAY WE UNDERSTAND SOPHIE IS OLD PLEASE LET ME STOP LISTENING TO THE BONE CRACKING NOISES PLEASE

ALSO WHO IS THIS CHILD

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this film has a wizard war in it?!?!!?

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IS HOWL SCAMMING PEOPLE BY PRETENDING TO BE LOTS OF WIZARDS

I ADORE THIS A LOT

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i also love this small and sassy child

"Calcifer only cooks for Howl."

WE'LL SEE ABOUT THAT, SOPHIE IS A FORCE TO BE RECKONED WITH!!!

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oh! Howl's back from the secret place and he looks Tired and Sad and i am Weak and an Embarrassment to Myself

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WATCHING OLD LADY SOPHIE OBVIOUSLY HAVING A CRUSH ON HOWL IS HOW I FEEL WHEN I GET CRUSHES ON ETHEREAL ANIME MEN, TOO

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omg... he ate the egg shells... that's too cute...

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"Everything else is dirty." ALL OF THAT CUTLERY WAS DIRTY, MARKL. ALL OF IT.

There is a LOT to clean here, you're right

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-weakly-

don't do this to me...

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Howl you are a hot mess, this place is a goddamn travesty

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dkjskjsdkjsd omg Calcifer clinging to the bit of wood like "I'LL GO OUT... SOPHIE... HELP..." dfkjdskj very funny, 10/10.

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god i know they're framing Howl from the POV of someone with a crush on him but also DO THEY HAVE TO DO THIS TO ME

AND HOWL WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH YOUR GRODY ASS BATHROOM OMG

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waaaaa ghibli movies are always so incredibly beautiful and always immediately tap into the 'found family' feeling so quickly it makes me wanna weep

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okay but why did they give bird-man Howl pecs

why did he need pecs

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I DON'T LIKE THIS SCARY WAR PLACE

I GUESS THAT'S PART OF THE POINT

all the pomp of the bands and the marches and then... this...

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oh no... tired...

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"They'll cry later on, when they realise they've forgotten how to take a human form."

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OH WAIT WHAT, SOPHIE ISN'T OLD WHEN SHE SLEEPS????

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OH NO... the ship is destroyed and there's blob men and an airship dropping bombs and flyers??!?!? shit kicked off all of a sudden!!!!

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JESUS FUCKING CHRIST WHAT IS HAPPENING

CAN YOU PUT SOME CLOTHES ON PLEASE SIR

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DDKJSAKJDSKJ HOWL YOU ARE NAKED AND RIGHT UP IN HER GRILL RIGHT NOW CAN YOU BACK UP AND CALM DOWN AND PUT ON A BETTER CLOTHING PLEASE FOR ALL OF US

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ZETSUBOU DA LMFAOOO oh my ogd he's so DRAMATIC I am so endeared but aLSO PUT YOUR ASS CRACK AWAY HOWL THIS IS A NON HORNY CHANNEL PLEASE

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HIS WHOLE GODDAMN BUTT IS OUT

WHO VOTED FOR THIS

I'M SUING YOU ALL

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WHAT'S THE POINT OF LIVING IF YOU AREN'T BEAUTIFUL FDKJFKJFD OH MY GOD. THIS DRAMATIC BABY MAN. OH MY GOD.

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"He's calling on the spirits of darkness! He did this last time a girl dumped him."

DKJFDKJKJDS I'M FUCKING CRYING OH MY GOD. THIS MOVIE. WHAT THE HECK.

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slime!howl is someone's kink, and i'm happy you got to see it, whoever you are

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OH NO SOPHIE CRYING IN THE RAIN... I'M GONNA CRY TOO... AND THE LOVELY SCARECROW...

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Most dramatic things in this movie:

1) Airships dropping bombs on screaming crowds
2) Howl dropping his towel.

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ADHKJSDHKJAHKJDSA SOPHIE. HONESTLY. SAME.

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Howl's room is inspirational tbh

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goD I'M SO FUCKIN DOKI DOKI OVER THIS DRAMATIC LUMP

I love Sophie pretending to be people to get him out of going to war fkjdfkjdfkj

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whatever the FUCK that is can FUCK OFF

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IT'S HOWL?!?!?

GOD, I HATE IT

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That whole stair scene was Very Odd dfkjdkfj

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OH MY GOD THE DOG WASN'T HOWL SDKJDSKJDSKJ LMAO THANK GOD

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A demon stole his heart!? Tell me MORE!!!

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OH SHIT! Sophie turned younger when she was talking about him!!!

ALSO THIS WIZARD SHIT IS A LOT TO TAKE IN

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OH MY GOD THE FIRST KING WAS HOWL

THEY'RE TRYING TO TRICK ME LEFT RIGHT AND CENTRE HERE AND IT'S WORKING

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what the FUCK is happening

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OOO TRYING TO BUST DOWN INTO HIS BUILDINGS BUT THEY'RE ALL EMPTY HUH

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AAAAHHH MARKL HUGGING HER AND SO GLAD SHE'S NOT HURT I'M LOVE THIS LITTLE FAMILY

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Oh noooo that's a lot of blood and feathers you've tracked in, howl....... oh nooooooo

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okay these kitchy bangles and stuff tunnels are very good

THOUGH HOWL AT THE END IS LIKE A FUCKING BLOODBORNE MONSTER WHAT IN THE FUCK

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OH GOD WE HAD A CONFESSION???

WAS IT A DREAM??? GHIBLI, WHAT?????????

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god howl's hot

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-SOBS-

A FAMILY...

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"I added a bathroom for our growing family!" DFKJDKJKJDS OH MY GOD THIS FILM

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now LOOK. STOP.

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be still my beating heart...

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this better not be another one where they're all dead actually, you got me with that before, Ghibli, i'm onto you.

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oh nyyoooooo he said she was beuatiful and she turned all hunched and older again ;___;

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omg her mama is here!!!!! oh god and she's 'married a rich man' dsjkdfkjdf

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HER MOTHER WAS A SPY!!!!!!

GASP!!!!!

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MARKL ASKING IF HIM AND SOPHIE WERE A FAMILY IS GOING TO MAKE ME SOB

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OH GOD THE WAR IS HERE AND ALL THE BOMBS ARE DROPPING AND IT'S ALL GONE TERRIBLY WRONG

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GOD OKAY

BIRD HOWL IS HOT TOO I GUESS

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"I'm through running away."

DON'T YOU DARE FUCKING DIE THOUGH

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OH NO THE CASTLE COLLAPSED WHEN CALCIFER LEFT IT

sophie you're honestly a terrible long-term cleaning lady...

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Oh shit, she fed Calcifer her hair and he got SUPER STRONG again!!! YES!!! YES!!!!!!!!!!

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okay now we have Howl's Moving Bungalow

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NOPE OH NO THE OLD LADY WANTED HOWL'S DAMN HEART AND FUCKED IT ALL UP FOR EVERYONE

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oh shit Sophie going through the door to find Howl ;W;

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OH GOD IT TOOK THEM TO THE FLOWER FIELD HOUSE

AND ALL THE SHOOTING MAGIC STARS??? AND THE RING BREAKING??? AND MAYBE BABY HOWL???

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OH SHIT okay the falling stars were demons??? And Howl vored one to make a deal with Calcifer!?!?

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WAIT FOR ME IN THE FUTURE!? WHAT?!

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Markl: is he dead...?
Sophie: No, he's fucking fine. He's a dramatic little baby.

YES GIVE SOPHIE HIS HEART, OLD LADY

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YEAH SHE RELEASED HIM FROM THE DEMON'S SPELL! HOWL HAS HIS HEART BACK! HE IS DEFINITELY NOT MAGIC ANYMORE! AND NOW THEY'RE PLUMMETING TO THEIR DOOM

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THIS IS A FUCKING CURVE BALL TO THROW IN AT THE LAST MINUTE

GOODBYE SWEET TURNIP PRINCE THANKS FOR POPPING BY

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A HEART'S A HEAVY BURDEN I'M GONNA CRY STOP IT

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-SOBBING-

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I WILL ALLOW THIS ONE KISS AS THE CASTLE FLIES AWAY WITH THIS FOUND FAMILY.

I LOVED THIS FILM. AMAZING. THANK YOU ALL FOR JOINING ME ON THIS WONDERFUL ADVENTURE!

https://twitter.com/uzbadyubi/status/1216074079209263104?s=20

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