#harassment #sexualharassment #catcalling #thread
Don’t know what “men” (yeah, in quotes bc it’s laughable) think, but the vast majority of women don’t want to be honked at by randos. We don’t find it cute, flattering, or fun. It’s mostly annoying af and sometimes scary.
Don’t know what “men” (yeah, in quotes bc it’s laughable) think, but the vast majority of women don’t want to be honked at by randos. We don’t find it cute, flattering, or fun. It’s mostly annoying af and sometimes scary.
Silver lining? After 30 years of dealing with your bs entitlement to my existence, at least I’m not dealing with it as a 10yr old anymore... fuck ya’ll. P.S. if you’re thinking #notallmen, you’re probably sexually harassing someone or thinking of calling me a fat bitch. #tiredass
I think I was probably 7 or 8 when I first noticed men (20-70 years old) thinking it was ok to invade my space with the drive by kiss, tongue flick, catcall, letting me know the firmness of their dicks, hugs that lasted to long, hands on my knee, or asking for my personal info.
At 8 years old, I woke up to my aunts husband massaging my ass. I pretended I was asleep and just rolled over so my body was covered with blanket. He rolled me back over and continued to fondle me. A few days later, my mom asked me what was wrong bc I guess I was visibly upset...
I had written about it in my diary - I remember drawing a big sad face - and showed it to her. When confronted he said I had a wedgey and he was just fixing my underwear 🙄. He was kicked out of my grandmothers house and they eventually divorced.
Prior to that, I remember driving home with him after a party. My brother and I in the back seat. Before we got to house he stopped car. I was wearing a tank and he put his arm on my back to “show me how cold his hand was.”...
I pushed my lower back against the bump of door to stop his hands from going passed my waist, which I could feel him resisting. He eventually gave up. 20 years later he’s in prison for life bc of doing much worse to children of subsequent marriages...
Within a year, at a whopping 9 years old now, I went to my neighbors to see if my friend could play. She wasn’t home, but her grandfather was. He’d always been kind and safe feeling. Welp, he invited me in and started playfully talking about how cute I was...
...Somehow we got to him looking up my skirt and telling me how pretty I was down there? Or something... he let me leave after that. I never told anyone, bc I wanted to be able to play with my friend. No idea if he hurt her... I can only assume...
When I waaaaaas 13/14? when we lived in town house a couple doors down from a young couple (20s). Sometimes they’d be outside and we’d chat. A friend of theirs would hang out. Eventually he started hitting on me (encouraged by the neighbor)...
...We’d have conversations about sex and at one point he told me “it was ok” that I was a virgin and that we should spend some time alone. I think he found my awkwardness, hesitance endearing. It wasn’t...
... I was fucking uncomfortable, but he was “being nice” and I didn’t have the tools to tell him he was a fucking predatory loser. So I politely smiled and laughed as I would try to leave multiple times until he allowed me to pass...
Reminder, these instances are spaced out, but meanwhile, getting harassed on the street is still a regular occurrence. By regular I mean MULTIPLE times EACH TIME I walk down the street. It just became part of the background noise...
Anywho... so now I’m 14/15... walking with friend when some dude stars ogling us. I had the audacity to yell “WHAT!?” I can see him cursing me out through his rear window as he pumps his breaks. About 10 minutes pass...
...my friend and I are crossing the street, standing on the median when we hear “Bitch! What the fuck do you mean what!?” I turn and that fucking grown ass “man” had circled the block to attack a teenager for calling out his shit behavior...
...i remember the fucking hate and anger in his eyes and one hand reaching straight down (in my head it meant gun, but I don’t know) and was definitely scared. When I saw him, all I could muster was... “huh!?” as I registered what was happening... he repeated the question...
...I just mumbled garbage as I laughed and turned around and walked away. I cried later bc I realized how powerless I would’ve been had he decided to do something. I should’ve sat in a shop, but we ran home, which is dumb bc had he followed us, there woulda been no witnesses...
So then, I had kinda developed a need to feel empowered so would talk a lot of shit and put down women I deemed weak. Like I would talk about women in abusive relationships deserved bc they stayed and “if a man EVER laid a hand on ME! Psh”...
Welp... at 15 I found myself in a physically #abusive relationship, scar by my eyebrow as a lovely reminder. Little did I know that my pride and codependency would keep me in that relationship for a year... I was so embarrassed and scared that people would see how week I was...
...once, bc I did, I don’t know, something wrong, he had me take off my underwear, lay in the floor and tried to #rape me as my punishment. He started to, as I whispered “I hate you,” but didn’t get too far as my family was getting home... sooo... lucky me I guess...
Let’s see... as an adult two a few men specifically that I didn’t know, who were talking to me while I was at work alone, were groping themselves telling me how hard my “pretty little smile” made them, one held his penis through his pants to show me the outline...
Walking down the street to work, one dude asked how I was. So not to “be a bitch” I said, “good thanks, you?” His response was, “I’d feel better with those thighs around my waist.” Been called a bitch for not wanting to give a stranger my number...
Men threatened me on dating sites for not being interested in them. Dated (10 years) and almost married a dude that constantly me pressured me into do things I was really uncomfortable with. I’ve had men demand explanations as to why I had the nerve to not give them my number...
I’ve had men not take “no” for a fucking answer when I don’t want to talk. I’ve had men try to lift my skirt in public. I’ve been told I was a fucking tease because I paid a dude a compliment with no intentions to go further than that. I wear headphones just to avoid men.
The saddest part about all of this, is I feel shitty and embarrassed talking about this bc it’s not even that bad in comparison. Since I’ve never been raped or molested for a long period of time, I literally consider myself generally lucky. How fucked up is that!?
