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Dem alikuwa kama maji safi lakini ya mtaro, unakunywa at your own risk. Dem akiona pombe miguu zinafunguka kama mlango za lamboghini, ameona hostels mingi kushinda dean of students. Kazi ni kutucheza kama PS4, alafu anameza P2, anaweza fanya wanaume wachukuliane P3.
Happy New Month fam… stay safe, wear a face mask, keep social distancing, sanitize and wear a damn condom… usipo jichunga utachungwa na ulimwengu!
VOTE for my pal @Osama_otero and I fanfave.nrg.radio for the Most influential Twitter Personality category
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More from @_crazynairobian see all

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Billy The GOAT
@_crazynairobian
Dem anakuliwa na kila mtu campus kama HELB loan. THREAD.
Campus relationship mingi huanzia kwa dancefloor siku ya dunda, mnajuania hapo akikutingishia kinyambis alafu una waste your best campus years trying to hope that she’ll be faithfull only to you na akuwe anakosa kuenda dunda kama hauko, lol.
So kuna day kumekuwa na dunda, ilikuwa fresher’s night so raiya walikuwa wamegeuza dancefloor kuwa hunting ground ya fluid exchange… transfer market ya new fresher girlfriends ilikuwa officially on na second years na thirds year walikuwa wanafanya signing.
Read 25 tweets
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Billy The GOAT
@_crazynairobian
Nimewai hepa home kuenda bash siko invited alafu kufika huko nikafukuzwa saa sita usiku, hapo ndio nilijua meaning ya mwenda tezi na Omo marejeo ni nyumbani… THREAD.
Peer pressure huwa mbaya, nikiwa bado high school and living under the old man’s roof kuna day arif alinisho kuna bash ya cousin yake huko Mountain View, na sisi tulikuwa tuna stay Ndumbu-ini.
Way back then Mountain View ndio ilikuwa Rhunda ya wasee wa Waiyaki Way, so nilikuwa excited nikajua hii bash lazima nifike juu nilijua mahali kuna bash kuna madem, obviously singekata.
Read 28 tweets
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Billy The GOAT
@_crazynairobian
Ukipatwa kwakina dem ni heri utoke mbio uwache akijitetea kuliko ujifiche, mimi nililala chini ya bed kwakina dem just so that asikuwe in trouble na bado tuliwachana. 🤡
Bado mi hukumbuka hii kitu inani traumatize, juu hiyo siku nilienda huko na aim ya kujua kwao just incase in future tutakuja Ruracio nijue ni wapi tunaleta ng'ombe za mahari.
Alafu nakumbuka dem alikuwa amenisho mamake ni mwalimu so obviously hatakuwa around hadi majioni ndio atoke shule, nikajua the coast is clear... Nikajua pakaa akitoka Sewer rat hutawala 🤡🤡
Read 28 tweets

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