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Sooz
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9 Nov, 5 tweets, 1 min read
WHOA! John Redwood has sent President Elect Joe Biden a letter warning him to fall in line over Brexit. OMG Biden's gonna absolutely shit himself!
Biden thought when he won the presidency it would be all plain sailing but he didn't reckon with getting a letter from ERG back bench-dweller ACTUAL JOHN REDWOOD!
Shiiiiiiit just heard that Biden is thinking of resigning after John Redwood's letter.
Getting reports that following John Redwood's letter President Elect Joe Biden called Trump and said "WHAT THE FUCK AM I GONNA DO?!" and Trump said "it's lonely at the top, hun" and hung up on him and Biden has asked the Supreme Court if Trump can just stay on for another term!
OH NO the Supreme Court have OK'd Biden's request for Trump to stay on as president for another term and deal with Redwood! This is the worst possible news for the left. They ruled in favour of the request 9-0. John Redwood is said to be "delighted".

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More from @SoozUK

Sooz
12 Nov
For some this is behind a paywall so here, an interesting article on what Trump can do to steal the election. Image
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Read 6 tweets
Sooz
11 Nov
Carrie Symonds was really mad about how Dominic Cummings just sat behind a trestle table in the 10 Downing Street garden for that press conference. She said it should have been a podium. #CarrieSymondsOpinions
Carrie Symonds said John Redwood should have waited before writing to President Elect Joe Biden about Brexit. She reckoned it would have had more impact signed by the cabinet in January. #CarrieSymondsOpinions
Carrie Symonds laughed when she found out about Change UK. "That's not going to work haha!" she was quoted as saying. #CarrieSymondsOpinions
Read 6 tweets
Sooz
23 Oct
THREAD: How to get semi-Twitter-famous.

1. Tweet about three specific things non-stop. Mine are Sonic, progressive politics and stuff that happened to me in 1992.
2. Do it all the time, every single day without second guessing yourself.
3. Post several pictures of cats per week. If you don't have a cat just take photos of cats you see in the street.
Read 7 tweets
Sooz
22 Oct
THREAD: I woke up at 6 and immediately HAD to write down the dream I had coz this shit was CRAY. It's about Donald Trump and me.
In the dream Trump let me in his office to ask him questions every so often. He was incredibly rude to me but would let me ask him just about anything and he was always saying that Tyler Perry loved him and I would say "I'm sure he'll learn the truth eventually".
By the way, it wasn't the Oval Office, it was some weird long thin office which I THINK was sort of the conference room from Network.
Read 9 tweets
Sooz
21 Oct
Bet Diana would have done a fucking iconic photoshoot with Meghan Markle for Vanity Fair by now and it sucks I don’t get to stan AND lampoon it. It sucks for all of us.
Had to delete this and write it again coz my phone’s autocorrect is out of control and mugs me off constantly.
Thinking about canvassing for Labour with Diana now. They pair us up together in Crawley and stop for lunch at the Burger King in the County Mall. Diana and I share a large fries between us coz otherwise you fill up on them and don’t enjoy the second half of your Whopper.
Read 4 tweets
Sooz
27 Jul
When a literal Nazi who went by several account names based around "White Europe" targeted me with antisemitic hate for 2 months Twitter did nothing. Gas chambers, screengrabs of photos of my grandparents and great-parents, Nazi propaganda pics, all used against me by that troll.
However I have decided I will not be leaving Twitter for 48 hours to send some sort of message because I don't want to leave a website where for 2 days the racists have free rein. I'll stay here calling out their bullshit.
And if one shit-for-brains absolute melt shows up in my mentions saying something racist of any variety be prepared to feel my wrath. I have a lot of it and I can be a reeeeaaaal asshole.
Read 8 tweets

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