Right! It's results time! First off, the Great #DrawBorisJohnson Challenge on this special day for our KGB sleeper agent Pantomime Prime Minister, the day his sidekicks started eating his face! Remember, you can see all the entries here martinrowson.com/draw, so I'll limit...
...myself in the limited time availabel to me to just a few especially striking entries, otherwise I'd be chained to this damned computer all day and night, and some of us have homes to stay in and jobs to do too. That said, as ever, you lot never cease to amaze me, all of you...
...in the breadth of your talent and the depth of your rancour. I can think of few rancours who deserve to be the recipient of it more than "Boris". So, I need to start with the traditional hat doff to @SwissRich71 for his stamina & consistency. Salute!
...and also a special mention to 9 year old Ciara, daughter of @k8tielou78, for her latest entry - though if you're looking at some of the other entries, I'm sure ChildLine's contact details are easily available
Special mentions also for the objets trouve, a category that always delights. These are from @AuntyNationalAH (currently unjustly suspended from Twitter) @cairnstoon @zdok and former winner @joe_ackenbush, being his dog's cyst
And also a special special mention for @REmbroiderer, a new member of our weird little creative cult and in the vanguard of Radical Embroidery, the Medium of The Future! Turn off the machines and get out yer needles, o mindless slaves!
Otherwise, it's noticable, and worth noting, how so many of you haven't given "Boris" the kind of brutal gand-style kicking he's been crying out for since his early teens. Indeed, the overall tone is almost of Pathos. Here's @MagwitchC @raisethegame @t0adscroak & @StuDrawings
And if you'll forgive me, here's some more from @StuDrawings - I just love Stuart Taylor's Peakean pencil line - plus more sadness from @Phyllida1234 (Chaplin's ontime co-star - true!) @stevemaythe1st & @StephenCliffe3
...and from former winner @nuffinc. Some of you, to be sure, have no milk of human kindness running in your frozen veins, and quite right too. Here's @grimdix @JasonNParkinson & former winner @RobertDWells putting the boot in
...and here's some vulture hearted nastiness with a gentle sprinkling of humour too, from @fitzdoodle, former winner @JamesDFMellor @mistermunroltd & Viz' very own @taylertoons
It's another joy of these Challenges to see you standing on the shoulders of giants - or, possibly, a pile of dwarves - through the magic of pastiche. Here's @cuffe64 ripping off South Park, @MajorPazuzu chanelling Watchmen, & the very talenred @nickymonkey pastiching Gillray
...while the estimable @Songicartoons gives us a bit of Bugs Bunny and Elmer Fudd, @davidsjanes does the Tarot, @davidpeterkerr, in keeping with the whole of Western Art, pillages the Bible, and @StickyDrawer rather brilliantly riffs on Graham Sutherland
Nonetheless, the overall mood remains one of melancholy. Here's @Cunningsplan & @adamcavill. Indeed, the Sad Clown seems to be the meme here - which is hardly fucking Churchillian, is it now? Here's former winner @artguru and @Chance4321...
...& former winners @kevinwellsart & @PaulRRed1, & this cutie from @Je11y318 I don't dispute the brilliance and accuracy of these depictions, but I also have to believe that this monster of self-serving narcissistic monstrosity deservers much worse. @Ed_Grace is getting there...
Remember, this pathetic lump of lard is responsible, on his watch, for the deaths of 50,000 of our fellow citizens, + the endless humiliating shitshow of Brexit. These, from @ShaneoFontaine @ChicanePictures & @oddlyACTIVE channel real, vermin-inducing, bodyshaming bile
But the winner, just for its effortless simplicity, from a true pro, has to go to this minimalist masterpiece from @jonesycartoons. In case, no more need ever be sad about @BorisJohnson. Please. Well done!

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More from @MartinRowson

8 Nov
The defeat of Trump might - just might - mark something else, which is the beginning of the end of the Global Hegemony of Trollism. At heart, what marks “populism” apart from the fascism is engenders is that the engine for achieving right wing dominance (with all the standard...
... hallmarks of theft, exploitation larded with persecution) is nakedly to front the enterprise with genuinely obnoxious, deeply flawed people whose defining shtick is that they really really annoy anyone seeking to thwart all that theft & persecution. Trump is a trust fund...
...daddy’s boy who, like Johnson, would benefitted enormously from even the dear of being beaten up at a bus stop aged 15. As it was, they got away with being obnoxiously selfish so much it became their whole being, fuelled by laughter from over indulgent onlookers. Shift that...
Read 7 tweets
6 Nov
Poetry Korner (written 29.9.20)
The Shining City on The Hill

You see that Shining City on The Hill?
The shame is that the shine is just
The gleaming of the oily sheen
On the rats’ backs swarming from its slums,
The shimmer of the stacks of trash,
The glister of the stolen gold..
Reflected in the pools of blood,
The glistening of the sweat of slaves,
The sparkle of the film star’s teeth,
The Milky Way of motes of stirred up dust
Twinkling in the beams that play around
The shadows as they tic across the cave,
The flicker in the polished dreams...
Of Freedom, just a fresher theft
To free the thief to thieve, and thieve
Others’ freedoms too, self-evidenced
By genocide and force transhumance
In a bolthole built for grifters
By bigots who sought havens for their hatreds,
And newly peopled by great waves of deadbeats...
Read 5 tweets
5 Nov
Poetry Korner Lockdown Special
The Elephant in the Room

The elephant that’s in this room
Just shat upon the floor.
I know what everybody says;
They say -simply ignore!
But when the bastard’s shat again
No self respecting chatelaine
Could cope with it much longer. Furthermore
That elephant’s been in this room since,
Let’s see, well before,
The end of March, and just slouched round
To block the exit door!
And now he gone and shat again!
Over my Persian mat! Explain
How we endure this for a month! Before
The latest rules I tried to tie
A face mask to his trunk.
He lifted his enormous leg
And showered me with spunk,
And now the fucker’s shat again!
He’s on some fucking scat campaign!
The worst of it’s I can’t even get drunk.
Read 6 tweets
15 Oct
And here's Today's #PlagueSong. Altogether now...

Team Song

You put your tender in!
You drive your rivals out!
You send in your consultants
When the money’s thrown about!
You put the Hokey-Covid
In your Turnover
That’s what it’s all about!
Whooooaaaaaaa! Hokey-hokey-Covid!
Wheeeeeeeeeeee! Hokey-hokey-Covid!
Phwaaaoooooor! Hokey-hokey-Covid!
Knees bent
Boots filled
Ra-ra-ra!
You drive the numbers up!
You keep the proles locked down!
Send in more consultants
Who can go to town
Getting the Hokey-Covid
In our Turnover
That’s what it’s all about!
Read 6 tweets
14 Oct
Right, lots of lovely #DrawBorisJohnson Challenge entries still coming - keep em coming til Hallowe'en! Also being flooded with #DrawDonaldTrump Challenge entries - that's open til 3rd November. Happy to keep you busy. And here's some of the ways I've drawn @realDonaldTrump
And that lot was just 2016, leading up to his election & its immediate aftermath. Now we get to the real filth
Read 15 tweets
12 Oct
Lots of kind words from recidivist entrants to the Great #Draw Challenges testifying at how these damn things have stopped you all going completely barking mad over the past 6 months. Glad to have been of service, but also conscious of various things, which I shall now adumbrate
First, do we try and ratchet the whole thing up a notch, get proper sponsorship & serious money prizes run by a huge Media conglomorate with a vast back office to process all the drawings with something approaching rigour & good practice, or do we stick with the current...
...half-arsed approach of me eventrually getting round to choosing what I like best and then trying to remember to post an offloaded old book to the winner? Well?
Read 5 tweets

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