1) There comes a time where every man has his breaking point.

That day was today for me.

After EVERYTHING, falling off a ladder, my kitty being sick and doing her best impression of a cow on my carpet, assembling a day bed, and NOT FINDING FOUR ROSES ANHWHERE, I turned to this:
2) "What was your breaking point Fudge?"

WELL APPARENTLY WE'RE ALL SO FUCKING HARD IN OUR FUCKING PANTS SIMPING FOR TRUMP THAT WE'RE ARGUING HOW MUCH OF OUR MONEY THE GOVERNMENT SHOULD BE SENDING BACK TO US THAT WE HAVENT SAID DONT TAKE OUR FUCKING MONEY
3) Yeah, no prisoners taken today.

Fuck stimulus payments.

SLASH THE FUCKING TAXES YOU SELF INDULGENT COCK SUCKERS @GOP @TheDemocrats THATS HOW YOU SAVE THE FUCKING ECONOMY.

OH WAIT.

YOU CANT DO THAT.

BECAUSE THEN YOU WOULDNT BE ABLE TO PASS YOUR FOREIGN AID BILL YOU FUCKOS.
4) OH YEAHHHHHHH BITCHES.

I went DIGGING.

You know, ACTUAL FUCKING RESEARCH, and I found out the FUN FUN FUN FUCKING FUNFUCKS YOU ALL HAVE BEEN DOING.

govtrack.us/congress/bills…

REMEMBER THIS?
5) "But Fudge, isn't that the bill that they just passed?"

WHY YES IT IS FUCKO.

"This bill was originally introduced as the United States-Mexico Economic Partnership Act. That text passed the House and Senate in late 2019 and early 2020"

ITS A GODDAMN YEAR OLD.
6) FOR YOU SEE!

These CUNNINGLY RETARDED FUCKSTAINS...

Took a fucking FOREIGN AID BILL...

FROM LAST GODDAMN YEAR...

And because they COULDNT FUCKING GET THEIR SHIT TOGETHER FORGOT ABOUT IT...
7) And then stapled $600 stimulus checks to it, called it a "Consolidated Appropriations Act", and now are trying to ram this through hoping none of us notice that its A FUCKING YEAR OLD BILL THEY COULDNT FUCKING AGREE ON AND FORGOT ABOUT THEN RESURRECTED FROM THE TRASH BIN.
8) Does NO ONE ELSE SEE THE FUCKING ISSUE?

Does NO ONE ELSE SEE A FUCKING PROBLEM WITH THIS?

No, you fuckos want to say, "But I want $2000 rather than $600 becuz datz what Trump says we should get"

FUCK YOU.

THIS should be why it gets fucking veto'd.
9) NONE of your Reps are afraid of you, or give a fuck about what you think.

NOT.

ONE.

Not ONE of your Reps or Senators are actually batting an eyelash at the fact that this was a foreign aid bill repackaged as an appropriations bill and then had a $600 check stapled to it.
10) I made a thread the other day lamenting that our fucking legislative and judicial system was so goddamn convoluted a layman couldn't accurately figure out where bills came from or the overall status of a case winding its way up the tiers of courts.

AND YOU PUSHED BACK.
11) Some STUPID MOTHERFUCKER started bitching at me saying 'ignorance of the law isn't an excuse to break it'

MOTHERFUCKERS, THAT IS NOT WHAT I WAS FUCKING SAYING.

IM SAYING WE DONT KNOW HOW THE FUCK TO LOOK UP AND SEE WHERE THE FUCK A BILL CAME FROM OR WHO WROTE IT.
12) You want to know who wrote this piece of shit?

govtrack.us/congress/membe…

Henry Cuellar, a Democrat from Texas.

BUT DO YOU KNOW WHAT'S FUNNY?

THE BILL'S TEXT WAS ENTIRELY OVERWRITTEN, AND CONGRESS DOESNT TRACK WHO DID SAID OVERWRITING, SO WE DONT FUCKING KNOW.
13) THIS is the SHIT that I was talking about.

They take a bill that was DEAD IN THE FUCKING WATER, replace it's text, it's name, it's fucking ENTIRE EXISTENCE with a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT FUCKING BILL, and then bypass ALL THE FUCKING LEGISLATIVE STEPS, and sell it as a new bill.
14) Not ONE FUCKING NEWS SOURCE TOLD YOU THIS, DID THEY?

Want to know why this bill came out of nowhere?

BECAUSE IT DID!

THEY REPLACED A DEAD YEAR OLD BILL WITH A DIFFERENT BILL, AND JUST TOOK THIS BILL'S PLACE IN LINE IN THE LEGISLATIVE PIPELINE. Said place? RIGHT AT THE END.
15) Congratulations everyone.

I bet our fucking representatives don't even know the fucking chicanery that took place.

If they do, they clearly don't care.

Business as usual

Want to slip a massive fucking dump of money into programs that DONT ACTUALLY EXIST except as wallets?
16) Want to do it without the American population realizing the FUCKING SCAM you're pulling?

Simple.

Replace a dead bill with a completely different bill's text, and rename it.

Attack a $600 check to people as a payoff.

Then get everyone arguing over the size of the check.
17) We DESERVE this butt fucking.

We all DESERVE the fucking REAMING we're getting from our government.

Because I'll bet you money that there are HUNDREDS of bills like this, sitting in limbo, waiting to be resurrected and turned into more fucking cash dumps.
18) None of that money is ACTUALLY going to any fucking foreign countries.

This goes to state department embassies.

Where the staffers give the money to rich locals who then give them and the politicians here in the US kickbacks in the form of lavish parties and donations.
19) Remember Ukraine?

Why do you think the State Department was involved with Hunter Biden?

Because they were getting kickbacks too.

Dump foreign aid to oligarchs, get lavish parties and hookers and blow thrown at you, help cover up Hunter's horseshit, get prosecutors fired.
20) Do NONE OF YOU REALIZE this is happening in EVERY FUCKING COUNTRY?

Do you want to know why some countries get more money than others?

Because some countries kick back more money than others.

China kicks back THE MOST MONEY.

OH YEAHHHHHH.
21) And why are the Republicans helping keep this going?

BECAUSE THEY'RE GETTING KICKBACKS TOO.

Gotta keep the money flowing to keep the kickbacks rolling, yo.

But hey. I'm a drunk asshole.

What the fuck do I know?

/end

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More from @HNIJohnMiller

21 Dec
1) Let me drop an uncomfortable truth on everyone.

Literal fucking genocides are happening in CA and NY, and they’re the most fucked up genocides of all time, because the victims have been conditioned to do the mass murder themselves and are then given the tools to carry it out.
2) See, the whole decriminalizing hard drugs? The decriminalizing of knowing std spreading? Here’s the hypothesis: give a person enough rope and they’ll hang themselves.
3) CA and NY have the highest rates of homelessness, and it keeps. On. Growing. They couldn’t ship them to other states fast enough. So in the name of ‘morality’, they had their solution.
Read 14 tweets
17 Dec
Someone rents home. Landlord denies maintenance of broken part of the structure. Does the renter know his rights to deny landlord rent until the maintenance is performed? Does a renter know the steps he must take to show a judge he is prepared to pay back rent upon maintenance?
Does a renter even know where he would go to look for his rights?

If he did know, would he be able to navigate a 20 year old website to find the required information he needs in order to enforce rights for which legislation was written to provide him?
And to my main argument, no one knows what the status of the various legal cases are. Our basic duty as Americans was to vote. We have voted. We still do not know the outcomes of our votes and what court cases still continue to make their way through the system.
Read 5 tweets
17 Dec
I've decided that I will not be spouting off an uninformed, kneejerk opinion on a topic I don't have enough information about. Instead I shall cast shame on the idiots who do, and bring further confusion to everyone.
We as a people have been defanged not only by being fed wheelbarrows full of raw unmitigated horseshit, but even the knowledge of where to go to find this information has been buried beneath obscuring layers of horseshit thicker than the planet's crust.
We do not live in a democracy, whose vital functions require a freeflow of information much like pure capitalism requires a completely informed consumer populace. We instead live in an oligopoly of knowledge, where important facts we need to know are denied to us and hoarded away
Read 10 tweets
17 Dec
Hey, you.

Yeah, you.

You're not alone.
"Of course I'm not alone, I have people on Twitter I talk to!"

No, fuck that, dumbass. I'm not real. Your twitter followers aren't real. Likes and retweets are fake fucking points meant to skinner box you into wasting time on stupid shit.

I mean, you, as a person, aren't alone.
Lol to all the people throwing likes and retweets.

Y'all don't even know what I'm about to fucking throw at you and you're diving on that shit anyways.

Whatever.

Twitter's just a fucking internet insane asylum, a rattrap for the mad and the desperate.
Read 13 tweets
8 Dec
1) So. Waited to talk about this 'galactic federation' nonsense.

I'm going to put it like this:

If aliens were at all smart, they would NEVER TOUCH EARTH and PRAY TO THEIR FILTHY XENOS GODS EVERY FUCKING DAY we never leave our spinning dirtball.
2) Why?

Well, think about it.

In almost EVERY major sci-fi piece of literature and culture we have, HUMANITY FUCKING CONQUERS THE GALAXY.

If aliens were looking at our culture, they'd say, 'hey, they dream about space, let's see what about it they li- OH WHAT IN THE FUCK?!?'
3) 'But what about Star Trek?'

Yes, Star Trek.

You know what happens in Star Trek?

Humanity gets FTL tech, and within a few DECADES, suddenly every filthy xenos species is either a) OUR JUNIOR FUCKING PARTNER or b) GETTING THEIR ASSES WHIPPED BY US.
Read 7 tweets
1 Dec
1) Anyone passingly familiar bidding for state government projects won’t be surprised by this.

It is an unspoken fact in the US that the only thing that approaches the depth of Federal pockets is that of State and local governments.
2) As you approach state and local levels, you trade the raw money-printing power of the Feds with increasingly less oversight and regulation, until companies can literally sell societal snake oil, certified by ‘professional boards’ staffed by THEIR OWN employees and lobbyists.
3) What happens as a result of this self-propagating scam artistry of state and local government ‘consultants’, ‘contractors’, etc is that they conglomerate and merge together, each new company buying the old ones and repackaging the disasters under a new brand name.
Read 12 tweets

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