Thread by @Ekwulu

Drinking tips from a Cocktail Connoisseur
Drink responsibly
*THE A-Z OF POPULAR ALCHI...*
Hennessy VS / OX and VSOP is more of a culture than a premium drink.
Even worse is that you have probably never tasted an original.
JW Red Label used to be this popular. These days it’s

usually in First Aid boxes for cleaning open injuries.. like TCP.
It will happen to Henny
Jameson is an alte drink.
It represents youth and some sort of Political correctness.
On its own, it’s better off as a very good base to mix cocktails.
It’s also highly tolerable.
Regardless

of your brand, you can manage Jameson as a second choice.
Glenfiddich is Jameson.
But for Older people and new money.
Kind of what Jack Daniels No. 7 represents.
Except that JD at every level is better than its counterpart in Glenfiddich.
But as I type, Glenfiddich is a growing

trend.. so people are more likely to tilt towards it.
Vodka is not a drink.
It’s a phase in life and every serious drinker has gone through it.
If you are not going through anything in Life, Vodka will hardly be your 3rd choice. Whether Ciroc or Belvedere or Pushkin.
You can

also use Vodka to remove tough stains on clothes.
Martell.
Their brands are usually smooth and pretty good... but it does not have an identity.
A Martell drinker will buy Martell and that’s that.
No one will go to buy another drink and end up with Martell.
Even people that are

drinking it don’t know why they are.
Remy Martins is the Quiet sibling of Henessey.. they both face the same problems and almost same components.
Only that Remy Drinkers are a little more introverted and like to feel like they are mature.
Basically, Remy is Hennessy with an

accent.
It’s so weird that there are a lot of Tequila brands as some of them even pretend to be premium
Olmeca on the other hand is the “Corolla” of Tequila. They aren’t expensive but they are just perfect.
The chocolate flavor is far better than many other attempts at flavored

tequila
BULLET.
That’s the tweet.
Proceed with caution.
How can something so small be so dangerous?!!
The main use of Champagne is to prove a point.
That’s why you will never see anyone pour it into a flask and sip small small.
It has to be in a flute and in public.
And you will

keep drinking so that more people will see you.. and when they are all gathered, you start vomiting.
If we are about to get into a fight, offer me Red Wine first.
It goes straight to break ur joints, relax ur muscles and then activate ur fornicatory nerves
Red wine is not

manageable
especially dry red.
So if it’s not your thing, it actually tastes like Fola Osibo gutter water.- for those whom had in a state of drunken haze fallen into that gutter can relate ...
White wine is easily the most relaxing drink to have at home.
Few rules around how to

drink it.
Hardly requires mixing.
And the best kind of white wine will be the Moscatos..
Only problem is as long as it’s cold,
You will get carried away and next thing you are drunk drunk.
IRISH CREAM.
This was made for people that say “I don’t smoke but I do shisha”
You know

what feeling when drinking Irish cream, it feels like you are taking something healthy.
That’s a lie..
Irish cream is Alomo mixed with copious amounts of peak milk.
ALOMO is for Conductors.
ORIJIN BITTERS is for Front seat passengers that feel like they are not part of the bus

even though you can see them there
Alomo is what you drink before you go for an Armed robbery operation😂.
ORIJIN is what your drink when the operation was successful
Haha... STAR RADLER.
This is for toddlers whose mother was drinking alcohol in her third trimester and the baby

got used to it..
Those that drink star raddler are the perfect example of peer pressure.
And I believe at every sip, they pray for God’s forgiveness.
Because WTF?!!
RUM.
Hmm.
How many of you every tasted “Dark Sailor”?
Dark sailor will poison your mind against your best friend.

All you want to do is fight or steal his girl.
No matter how refined or distilled, Rum is the drink that will be served in Hell Fire🔥.
Perfect only for cocktails.
Aromatic Schnapps.
There isn’t much to write about it because I’m sure a good 60 - 70 percent of you have never

tried it.
But me, I have.. a lot. 😁
And I don’t have much to say..
It’s really a drink for the ancestors and if you touch it, anything you see, you take. Simple.
As For Gin.
It’s largely drank by OGs or people who generally have no idea what to drink but want to be different.

“Gin and Tonic”
it sounds good but doesn’t feel good. It will allow you take as much as you want..
Once you drink some water, you are gone - for good.
BEER!!!!
There’s no alcohol as sure as a beer.
Regardless of the brand.
Once you discover the beauty that is in beers.
once you

let taste buds adjust to it.
once you ignore what people think
your stomach should look like,
you’ll appreciate the beer.
When in doubt, order a beer.
In the 17th Century, when soldiers are about to go to the war front for really tough battles, they serve them with three drinks

LEGEND EXTRA STOUT: the 🔥 the bottle is a real ingredient.
GUILDER MAX: meant for race horses.
GORDON SPARK: battery water but in a cute bottle
PALMWINE.
The only problem with this drink is trust.. as long as you are not sitting under a palm tree with a straw, chances are it

will be mixed before it gets to you.
Fresh Palm wine is god sent
Sweet and inviting.
Until it ferments inside your stomach and the Highness begin
AMERICAN HONEY.
American Honey I believe was made for people with intolerant taste buds not smooth and is usually bought as an extra.

It’s sweet but really harsh to the throat and one can’t be quite sure what to mix it with.
American honey is Codeine that can’t cure cough.
Campari
Campari is like salt. It’s nice for cooking. without it, food will be tasteless
But can you eat salt alone? No.
Campari is for

individuals that got a raise at the office but the month has not ended yet to collect the new salary.
Campari and beer is nice but pointless.
In any case
Have a merry Christmas
Port Harcourt Drinkers Club (PHDC)''
-Asonumaka George Wakama