Thread by @QuinnyPig

New game, Twitter.

Find me a job posting that vaguely resembles "what you think I do" and then I will mock it.

It's gotta be at a big company, though; I don't want to crap on some overloaded 5 person startup for a bad req.

I will pick... this one!

https://twitter.com/kchestnut/status/1346690597743038467?s=20

What does it mean to work at IBM? A bunch of things that absolutely don't apply to a corporate comms role. Get any thoughts of being valued right the hell out of your non-coding head immediately.

"The successful candidate will be a master storyteller, and a master story-sharer."

Unfortunately this is @IBM, and if we're not talking about the controversial vice chairman hire announced today, we're instead reduced to telling stories from the Great War.

This sentence is some masterful story-sharing right here, I'll tell you what.

Indeed, IBM is indeed getting owned in the media this week.

I'm just going to come right out with it and be a petty asshole: I have more Twitter followers than your entire executive team, and my audience is absolutely the "corporate market" you're hurling ad spend towards.

Oh shit yes! Whenever someone asks me for career advice and I ask them "what would you do if money didn't matter," the answer is always "I would work within a highly matrixed organization."

This is the best intervention I've ever seen to shock someone out of a destructive spiral. Holy crap, when you get tired of having the stuffing kicked out of you in cloud, consider pivoting to running a rehab clinic.

"We cannot stress this enough in our posting for a New York based role: Fuck you, Colorado."

Yes, I think we're all agreed that this is a complete non-starter because I have a sense of whimsy and you're... IBM.