I want to make a movie about the white lady passive aggressive interrogation that is happening right now to root out which of the lovelies ratted like a damn champ
If we did not live in a misogynist society this would have as many greenlit projects as the GameStop story by dawn
I grew up in the wine country. Let me tell you, when rich white moms get mad at each other? It is a lot like CIA interrogations before we pretended there were laws.
Ok I need Cecily Strong, a toy poodle. and a faux-Tuscan McMansion, we’ll write as we shoot.

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More from @baddestmamajama

19 Feb
An anthology show that is just dead pilots, and at the end of the season the most popular one gets a series order
BUT they all draw from one pool of actors
I don’t know if it would work but screenwriters would need a lot less therapy
Read 8 tweets
19 Feb
I want there to be a trend in Hollywood where A-listers take a break and go act in a tiny community theater show that only runs for 4 weeks.
Put Matt Damon in the chorus of Guys and Dolls in Petosky for the Spring musical
And don’t tell ANYBODY
Read 4 tweets
17 Feb
What if- I know this is crazy - but what if - I know, I know, just stay with me - but WHAT IF we let some women direct shows and movies about iconic female characters
It’s bananas, I know it’s just a bit of silly talk, after all if you put a woman behind the camera and a woman in front of the camera there’s a 64% chance the camera will explode but it would be such a TWIST
I just feel like I see so many things that are ANNE OF CLEVES directed by Joe Manguy! CLEOPATRA directed by Harold von Dude! THE ADVENTURES OF YOUNG PRINCESS LEIA written and directed by Penis McManMan!
Read 4 tweets
17 Feb
I know it’s supposed to last another 5 billion years but do you ever worry the sun is just going to get tired?
I mean I try to workout daily but there’s always at least a few days a week where I’m like “ugh, no.”
What if our only legacy is in an alien textbook where there’s a signal line that says “extinct from tired sun.”
Read 6 tweets
17 Feb
So four years ago I raised (and drained my savings) to make a little feature with zero names and a mostly female cast and crew for less than $100k and today that movie has a tentative release date and I honestly just wanted to see if I could do it at all? And I guess I could.
Talking to other filmmakers on the festival circuit, I can’t even begin to explain the difference between what we think of as an “indie” ($1-10m, a big actor or a tv star wanting to shift direction) and a tiny, tiny, no name film getting distributed. It is a whollllle universe.
You hear a lot that you only need one yes and it’s not true. You need about 7000, but only one per category. More than one is a luxury. Getting one is Everest. But it’s enough.
Read 5 tweets
10 Feb
The sad thing about Jurassic Park is that the people in the movie didn’t get to hear the music playing in all the dinosaur scenes
Alan Grant was just standing in a field with his mouth open in total silence
If you met Alan Grant and were like “dah da DUM dah Dum dah da DUM da Dum” he’d have no idea what you were doing and it would be so sad
Read 4 tweets

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