a thing i've gotten very good at that I just helped a friend in DMs with is de-escalating other people, eg someone DMs you a massive wall of text, how do you respond to that? I'ma try and share what I can without being too specific
if I get a huge wall of text, I tend to start by laughing and acknowledging ("haha wow this is intense!") – this punctures the solemnity somewhat
if there are lots of intense questions, I try to give short, breezy answers
if there are lots of intense questions, I try to give short, breezy answers
(fictional eg)
"> should I quit my job and dedicate my life to becoming a therapist"
"yooo that's a big decision. i would take my time with it, talk to more ppl"
> "what does it mean when a lover abandons you?"
"oof that's rough. idk. everyone is running their own diff BS"
"> should I quit my job and dedicate my life to becoming a therapist"
"yooo that's a big decision. i would take my time with it, talk to more ppl"
> "what does it mean when a lover abandons you?"
"oof that's rough. idk. everyone is running their own diff BS"
if they try to pedestalize me, I gently-but-firmly reject that
"you're the only guy that makes sense to me"
bruhh you gotta read more
"you're the only one I can trust"
that doesn't seem healthy man. im just some guy. u should talk to more ppl
"you're the only guy that makes sense to me"
bruhh you gotta read more
"you're the only one I can trust"
that doesn't seem healthy man. im just some guy. u should talk to more ppl
generally speaking my frame is: people with this sort of grandiose/manic/intense energy are sometimes having some sort of episode, and/or sometimes they're looking for someone to match them, to play out their drama/fantasy with them. I gently, friendly-kindly refuse
sometimes people calm down and get "better", sometimes I think they get bored (maybe because they were looking for someone who'd provide them with a false sense of comforting certainty, rather than invite them to think and take responsibility eww 😂)
I repeatedly remind people that I am Just A Guy, Y'know? I don't actually know much about that actually, shit's complicated, oof, yikes, damn, idk, etc
"wow you're so humble"
pls stop dehumanizing me bro I am a human with all the same human problems as u <3
"no but you're rly special"
you're special too, tho maybe u might be fixating on me a lil too much to see how special *you* are. everyone is special. nobody is. cmon now
pls stop dehumanizing me bro I am a human with all the same human problems as u <3
"no but you're rly special"
you're special too, tho maybe u might be fixating on me a lil too much to see how special *you* are. everyone is special. nobody is. cmon now
keep this going for a bit and people get bored
sometimes that hurts my feelings a bit LMFAO it's like they came at me expecting a Heroic Guru-God Figure and I'm like "yo i'm a person" and they're like "oh shit nah i'm good thanks"
sometimes that hurts my feelings a bit LMFAO it's like they came at me expecting a Heroic Guru-God Figure and I'm like "yo i'm a person" and they're like "oh shit nah i'm good thanks"
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