a thing i've gotten very good at that I just helped a friend in DMs with is de-escalating other people, eg someone DMs you a massive wall of text, how do you respond to that? I'ma try and share what I can without being too specific
if I get a huge wall of text, I tend to start by laughing and acknowledging ("haha wow this is intense!") – this punctures the solemnity somewhat

if there are lots of intense questions, I try to give short, breezy answers
(fictional eg)

"> should I quit my job and dedicate my life to becoming a therapist"

"yooo that's a big decision. i would take my time with it, talk to more ppl"

> "what does it mean when a lover abandons you?"

"oof that's rough. idk. everyone is running their own diff BS"
if they try to pedestalize me, I gently-but-firmly reject that

"you're the only guy that makes sense to me"

bruhh you gotta read more

"you're the only one I can trust"

that doesn't seem healthy man. im just some guy. u should talk to more ppl
generally speaking my frame is: people with this sort of grandiose/manic/intense energy are sometimes having some sort of episode, and/or sometimes they're looking for someone to match them, to play out their drama/fantasy with them. I gently, friendly-kindly refuse
sometimes people calm down and get "better", sometimes I think they get bored (maybe because they were looking for someone who'd provide them with a false sense of comforting certainty, rather than invite them to think and take responsibility eww 😂)
I repeatedly remind people that I am Just A Guy, Y'know? I don't actually know much about that actually, shit's complicated, oof, yikes, damn, idk, etc
"wow you're so humble"

pls stop dehumanizing me bro I am a human with all the same human problems as u <3

"no but you're rly special"

you're special too, tho maybe u might be fixating on me a lil too much to see how special *you* are. everyone is special. nobody is. cmon now
keep this going for a bit and people get bored

sometimes that hurts my feelings a bit LMFAO it's like they came at me expecting a Heroic Guru-God Figure and I'm like "yo i'm a person" and they're like "oh shit nah i'm good thanks"

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More from @visakanv

24 Feb
almost every mention of Brian Eno's Scenius idea links to either Kevin Kelly's 2008 post, Bruce Sterling's repost of that on Wired, or a quote of Eno speaking in Sydney in 2009.

Here's a quote from Eno's 1996 book, "The Year With Swollen Appendices", via datadeluge.com/2019/01/brian-… ImageImage
this is interesting for a couple of reasons

1. he mentions that he came up with it "a few years ago", so likely early 1990s

2. he points at some examples himself (usually people link to Kevin Kelly's chosen examples) Image
Aha, and here is James Ogilvy mentioning a specific year and place – 1993, at a conference in London

books.google.com.sg/books?id=a2RIU… ImageImageImageImage
Read 10 tweets
24 Feb
looking at 20 years of blogposts and writing about scenes and scenius, and I think, funnily, everybody who's written about this is so eager to emphasize the the group over the role of the individual, that they seem to gloss over the role that "scene managers" play
Pericles' lover Aspasia hosted the house parties that Socrates hung out at
Max Planck hosted the house parties that Einstein hung out at
Read 8 tweets
24 Feb
advice for improving your dating profile
"I must confess I have a weakness for big butts, it's a problem. should I talk to a therapist about this??"

"I often get into trouble for blurting out what I think. a sensible man would learn to quit doing that. I am not a sensible man"

the point is to match your utterances to fit your personality

Read 6 tweets
24 Feb
Wait there were Two industrial revolutions? I am tired
1. Textiles, railroads, iron, coal, steam

2. steel, chemicals, petroleum, automobile, electricity
I feel like the thing most missing from my education was the emotional quality of things. Like how WW1 was a hideous shock that made lots of smart people become bleak and nihilistic af; I feel like I only started contemplating that stuff in my late 20s. Tho... I did read abt it..
Read 5 tweets
24 Feb
I love to study this sort of video very closely. If you really look you’ll see that the guys don’t actually want to hurt each other and they’re even quite careful to avoid it. It’s more like a mosh pit than combat. Ritual release of pent up anger but nobody wants to go to jail
there are these little rules like, if a guy falls down you give him a kick or two, but not the head, and but be slow enough to give him time to get back up
the objects (chairs, bicycles) are thrown with great gusto but if you wanted to do real damage you’d use them as melee weapons rather than projectiles

but the point is to avoid seriously hurting anyone. Please no cops or ambulances we are trying to have a civilised brawl here
Read 6 tweets
23 Feb
it's amazing how, in the absence of Having A Job, I somehow find a way to put myself in a position where I have at least two important sets of things to do, so that I can procrastinate anyway
it will be interesting to eventually become Fully Financially Independent just to see how I figure out creative new ways to avoid my work
(currently torn between "I have an ebook that's due on Feb 28" and "I have a salon I want to prepare for on Mar 13", both entirely self-inflicted)
Read 5 tweets

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