I once transcribed Boris Johnson and "bung a bob for a big ben bong"

I thought that was a low point

I was wrong

Today it was @MattHancock with @piersmorgan and @susannareid100

Here's a reminder of Boris

Before we start on Matt

Roll on to June 2020
And roll on to July 2020 and a "massive success"

Here's a reminder

On how we prepared in the summer

A reminder:

Hancock referred to war veterans saying that proroguing parliament would go against “everything that those men who waded on to those beaches fought and died for”, adding: “And I will not have it.”

"But on Saturday Hancock said his comments during the Tory leadership campaign were in relation to a plan for a much longer suspension, saying there was a “substantive” difference between that idea and what is actually happening."

I can't imagine how you justify that BS
So anyway

Enough of that

Let's get going with a focus on @MattHancock

I am going to put the transcription into tweets

And also into a photo

As there are 3 videos to cover
So let's get going
MH: I think we should be on this programme thanking my team you know they worked so hard.
PM: So let's just analyse that. I'm sorry. If you want to play that game with us you and your team have presided over a woeful handling of this pandemic that has led teo us having the worst death toll in Europe and one hundred and thirty thousand people dead.
PM So i am sorry if my first thought when you come on health secretary is not to thank you and your team for your brilliant handling of the pandemic. Because i don't think 130000 dead shows you handled it well. So I am sorry I am not thanking you and applauding you.
MH: Well ( cc: @davidallengreen )
MH: so the second reason I am exasperated and answer in this way is because as soon as I start answering a question you cut in and when I said can I answer the question you said no, whats the point of coming on if you are not going to let me answer?
PM: If you say there was no national shortage then the pictures of health workers in bin liners show there was a shortage. There's an inconsistency then.
MH: No it was totally obvious and your watchers know what I am saying which is yes there were individual problems. I know that. And thats what the team were sorting.
So in photograph form
It's his first line

"I think we should be on this programme thanking my team you know they worked so hard."

Your reminder

For most of 2020

Matt Hancock

No showed @GMB and @piersmorgan

Now he wants to dictate what the show talks about
Here's M. Thatcher

"I am bound to say that I am reasonably satisfied with the traditional arrangement under which we politicians leave you journalists to get on with your job while you journalists tell us how to do ours."

MH: You have got to learn the lessons all the time. You have got to learn the right lesson. If we learnt the lesson that we should put paperwork ahead of saving lives that would be the wrong lesson. That's why I took the approach I did.
PM: We just expect our cabinet ministers to abide by the law. I don't think its too much to expect. And if you do get caught breaking the law we expect you to say sorry. You don't agree. We will have to disagree.
MH: That's a fair summary of the situation.

Jesus where to begin

Here's a reminder
Boris Johnson on "learning"


"I’ve been comparing notes & talking to leaders around the 🌍, & I can tell you that 🇬🇧 is leading a growing global campaign amongst friends & allies"

Whom did he talk to?

What did his notes cause him to learn?

How did he apply it?
M. Thatcher (on law)

"My Britain is one where the rule of law is upheld, impartially even against the most powerful bodies in our community and where those entrusted with upholding the law, whether policemen or judges, are given respect, support and encouragement. "
M. Thatcher on Macmillan

"The Prime Minister is a man of the highest integrity and honour and should not, therefore, suffer for someone whose standards were not as high as his own.”
And here is a reminder

Of Boris Johnson

A man who FAILED to interfere successfully to tamper with a report into a bully

Who suppressed that report

And then invoked a protective square

PM You haven't apologised for unlawful conduct which seems an extraordinary position for a cabinet minister to take. Why haven't you?
MH: Well no I won't apologise because to apologise would imply I would do something differently. And given the choices that we were faced with in April & May when there were very serious problems with access to PPE & some people were going without & the team were working so hard
MH: To take some of the team off that life saving work in order to complete that paperwork in time instead of just over a fortnight the late would have been wrong.
PM: I understand that but you were found guilty of unlawful conduct. And it seems to me to be a strange situation for a cabinet minister representing a government is found guilty of unlawful conduct but sees it as nothing to apologise for.
PM: Surely if you have broken the law you should just say sorry I have broken the law. But you seem determined not to do that.
MH: The reason is if I was given my time again and if I was given the choice between doing work that saved lives or filing the paperwork at exactly the right dates I would have done the same and so would you Piers.
Now what is fascinating there

Is the artificial nature of the date range Matt Hancock is choosing to highlight as the time pressure in justifying ignoring due diligence and process in awarding contracts

After all

You can see the consequences of well

Cutting pandemic preparedness stocks

PM: One of your justifications was that you had avoided any national shortage of PPE. Well that's just a barefaced lie isn't it. We were chronically short of PPE. We haven't prepared properly for this pandemic.
PM: We got caught without enough PPE. Why are you pretending that actually back in that first wave we had enough PPE?
MH: I am not all. As I said just now there were areas were it was enormously challenging. And there areas were there were problems. But we never had a national outage of it , we were very close to that. But we didn't have a national outage.
PM: What do you mean by national outage? We had NHS staff having to use bin liners because they were seeing colleagues dying?
PM: I would honestly have more respect if you said two things about all this because I watched it on Andrew Marr- look we did break the law and I am sorry for that, here are my reasons.
PM: But your excuse wasn't that you avoided a shortage of PPE because you didn't avoid a shortage of PPE which is why nearly 800 health workers have died.
MH: No we never had a national outage of it because of my team and work that they were doing. Yes there were problems in individual areas and your photos are testament to that.
So we had local outages

How many did we have?

What areas were affected?

How long for?

At what point do "local outages" get viewed as national outages ?
A reminder

Mask grades were downgraded

A reminder

Priti Patel

“sorry if people feel there has been a failure to supply sufficient PPE”.


You mean there *IS*

But then again that's the Prittster

The lucky beneficiary of a protective square
You can go to a simple search

I am not going to list the numerous examples of the spread of them in terms of date range or in terms of geographical location

The NHS had to learn to deal with those "local" shortages

Staff who raised their concerns

There was even an app to make it easier for reporting of shortages

It even got specific coverage in Panorama

So that's a round of some of the clips from GMB this morning

There are a few others

But I chose these four to focus on

And I end with a thread on numbers

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More from @PandaScottish

23 Feb

I am going to counterpoint Boris Johnson

With some words from Margaret Thatcher

Dear God

Can people stop fucking making me quote Margaret
"Your hospitality tonight precludes me from giving you one of those high-minded lectures on the importance of your behaving responsibly, which some politicians in the past have made the mistake of delivering to your profession."

"In any case, I am bound to say that I am reasonably satisfied with the traditional arrangement under which we politicians leave you journalists to get on with your job while you journalists tell us how to do ours."

Read 11 tweets
22 Feb
"The world’s largest daffodil grower, which is based in Cornwall, is having to let hundreds of thousands of pounds worth of flowers rot following Brexit.

Varfell Farms, at Long Rock, Penzance, produces 500 million stems a year and needs 700 workers to pick them."
“We can’t harvest them, we don’t have enough pickers to pick them. We’re losing hundreds of thousands of pounds,” he said.

Hopes that Cornish workers could step into the shoes of those who are now unable to travel from the European Union have been dashed.
Read 10 tweets
21 Feb

The WHY as always matters

This is deliberate

It is confected

It is concerted

It is the UK's fault that coronavirus hit us so hard

Not politicians


Why is the Daily Mail so afraid
The headline

"Britain's status as the 'sick man of Europe'"

We aren't

Malta Has The Highest Levels Of Obesity In Europe

"With an obesity rate of 28.90%, it is the most obese nation in Europe, even though these numbers aren't high by world standards"

Read 19 tweets
19 Feb
Now you can go back to Newton

"Bernard of Chartres used to compare us to dwarfs perched on the shoulders of giants. He pointed out that we see more and farther than our predecessors, not because we have keener vision or greater height, but because we are lifted up and borne aloft on their gigantic stature."
Read 17 tweets
18 Feb

"UK's official contract is actually dated August 28, one day after the EU's contract."

A reminder
"British officials had earlier declined to provide the contract to CNN, making no mention of the redacted version, and have repeatedly refused to give details on the country's vaccine supplies, citing "security reasons."
Read 6 tweets
18 Feb


A small thread

On giants

So so many giants

God bless open global Britain and all who sail on her as she buccaneers her way on the seas raising her eyes to the horizon

The biggest giant - Boris

Read 12 tweets

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