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24 Mar, 4 tweets, 1 min read
Wife (to 8yo, in mom explaining voice): This is actually a good way to understand hyperinflation. [Explains] And that's why sometimes people want to have money back up by something like gold.
Me (barging in, using Dadsplaining voice):...
BUT, the "gold standard" is actually a devious way some rich countries try to cut off growth opportunities in the developing world, keeping those countries forever beholden to their evil banks.
Wife (annoyed and looking dead at me but keeping the Momsplain voice on):...
Yes, which is why I was about to explain about how now there's a new movement to have central banks issue their own digital currency, which, as I'm sure your father was just about to explain, could be a way for those countries to take control without risking hyperinflation...
Me: ...
Wife [now just showing off]: Daddy probably also wants to tell you about [says something I legit don't even understand well enough to repeat the words].
8yo: ... are you guys fighting?
Me: No... I'm losing.

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More from @ElieNYC

Elie Mystal Profile picture
21 Mar
Waiting in the CVS parking lot, this old white lady drives by, rolls down her window, and shouts at this black girl with a bag (clearly waiting for her ride:
"Is this where you get the vaccines?"
Black girl (couldn't have been more than 16) says nothing, goes back into phone...
White lady "I SAID, Is this where you get the vaccines?"
Girl now does an elaborate *look behind to see if there is somebody else this lady should be talking to*, LIKE AN EMPLOYEE. Says nothing.
White lady, screaming at the top of her lungs "IS THIS WHERE YOU GET THE VACCINES"...
Now people behind her in the lot start honking at her. She yells "THE SERVICE" as she rolls up her window and drives off.

To recap: Old white lady shouts herself out of vaccine information after assuming every random black person she sees is put on earth to help her...
Read 5 tweets
Elie Mystal Profile picture
2 Mar
Just to put a pin in the Seuss thing, there is not a Black parent my age THAT I KNOW who hasn't had the unique experience of opening a "new" Seuss story, starting to read it, and realizing that it's TOO RACIST TO CONTINUE and changing it on the fly in front of the kids.
It didn't take me long to realize I had to PRE-READ all Seuss stories, even ones I *thought* I knew well, before actually sharing them with my kids.
The fact that there are WHITE parents who haven't experienced this is actually white people TELLING ON THEMSELVES.
Read 4 tweets
Elie Mystal Profile picture
1 Mar
I really hope that people who are already complaining about Biden's immigration moves are listening to Mayorkas right now. "The entire system was gutted."

Trump (and Neilsen, and Wolfe and Steve Miller), simply BROKE immigration. Biden has to literally FIX ALL OF IT.
This is also why whenever I talk about @TheJusticeDept (my beat) I *always* emphasize how Biden and Garland need and should be given TIME. Cause Barr and Sessions BROKE JUSTICE too.
And I feel like this is actually what happens (though usually not to this scale) *every* time Democrats take power.

Republicans don't believe government can work, so when they're in charge THEY BREAK SHIT.

Then Dems have to spend years just putting it back together.
Read 4 tweets
Elie Mystal Profile picture
24 Feb
A year ago, I was in DC attending a @WeDemandJustice. It was a Dem debate night (the night Liz Warren went for Mike Bloomberg's exposed jugular). In my hotel room that night, I made a list about everything I knew about coronavirus... and everything I knew about Republicans
Instead of assuming the government was on top of it, I assumed complete incompetence. I figured, given Trump, he wouldn't do anything about it until white people started dying, so I had to survive about six weeks when mainly poor people would be left to die, before relief came.
I was actually terrified on the train back home. And then I had to do the hard part: convince my wife and 70yo mother to *stop going to work*
I couldn't do it that week, but I used ever skill of argument and persuasion and got them to burn a week of vacation at the start of March
Read 6 tweets
Elie Mystal Profile picture
17 Feb
On the courts, Democrats are the kids who give the bully their lunch money without conflict to avoid the unpleasantness of being stuffed in a locker.
For those who don't know: blue slips allow Republicans to block district court appointments, if one Republican Senator from that district objects.

It's how, say, Texas courts end up being full of trash Republican judges, even when Dems are in control of the WH and Senate.
Republicans all but ignored blue slips while they were in power. So Dems holding to them for District Court is, you know, the classic Democrat thing of hugging the distinguished gentlemen from across the aisle who just wants to humiliate trans kids... because COMITY
Read 7 tweets
Elie Mystal Profile picture
17 Feb
@JoeBiden could not be more WRONG about student debt. It's not Harvard grads that graduate with the most student debt in this country, as Harvard has GENEROUS GRANT MONEY to offer

Check your BU grads, your BC grads, and your completely out of touch understanding of the problem.
Moreover, to the extent that graduates of elite and expensive schools have more debt, that debt is DISPROPOTIONIATELY borne by students of color, who are least likely to have family financial help them through the ivory education they've earned but can't afford.
And, don't even get me started on the fact that hampering students, ANY students, with a lot of debt, makes it MORE LIKELY those kids will take the highest paying/most soul destroying job they can find, as opposed to taking less money to contribute to the greater good.
Read 5 tweets

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