Thread by @ekverstania

I learned this week how many parents and therapists strongly believe that speaking out against child abuse is inappropriate, and that one should only focus on the positives and not rock the boat.

My filters are gone. I can't be professional and dignified anymore. There are rules to online engagement and being civil and polite. I can't do what is demanded.

I don't want the world to exist with humans in it.

Thank you to my friends @Psyentific, @makermom3D and others who put on the light that showed me the way out of that hole. 👆

https://twitter.com/ekverstania/status/1375735840182263808?s=19

So here's what's happening. Nonspeaking autistic people are coming to me privately. They want to talk about the stuff the therapists don't want to face. Parents are coming forward, saying their children want people to #LISTEN to their concerns surrounding abuse.

They don't want people who provide access to communication to act as gatekeepers. They want in on this conversation. They want to know what other nonspeakers are saying. They want FULL PARTICIPATION.

And to me, that means that they need to be fully informed about what this controversy is about.

And knowing that some of their parents may have been abusers too.

People with communication disabilities are among the most vulnerable people in the world. And there are many people who would NOT want them to communicate, because many have been witnesses and victims of crime.

But that's not all. Many have opinions on what's good for others like them, and they want those people to be free from abuse too. In fact, many nonspeakers dedicate their lives to advocating for freedom of communication and freedom from abuse for others like them.

@Cal__Montgomery, who spent many years unable to speak, has placed himself back into trauma many times by speaking out against torture, to save others from it.

@endeverstar constantly strives for authentic identity and AAC access for others, and refuses to play up to the stereotypes which people like to present of nonspeaking people.

@AAC_Autistic is dedicated to training allies like me to see ableism in themselves and to correct it -- no holds barred.

Many people with communication disabilities are dependent on others for communication. They may need someone to hold a letterboard. They may need help getting connected to an eye-tracking device. They may need someone to provide enough symbols or signs to speak the full truth.

They may need someone to charge, repair or avail their communication device, even to speak up for their right to use one (a right often denied in medical settings and many other situations).

Sometimes these intermediaries are parents, spouses or other family members. Sometimes they are aides. Sometimes they are therapists. All of these intermediaries have the power to provide or withhold access to communication.

Today a young nonspeaking man sent a message to intermediaries via his mother. (I await confirmation as to whether I may name him and quote him verbatim.)

His message to the intermediaries was this:

https://twitter.com/ekverstania/status/1376161726299832320?s=19

One of the most famous nonspeaking people in the world, Carly Fleischmann, went missing after posting evidence online of sexual assault by her father's boyfriend. The fact that we have no idea where this FAMOUS person is now shows how vulnerable ordinary nonspeakers are.

So, you want to enable JB's friends' abuse pipeline, because you're scared of rocking the boat? You call being quiet about abuse 'nonpartisan'? I get it, that's what the word has come to mean in America.

Leave it to us mad autistic people then to have public meltdowns as we break our brains over your ableist silence. Many may be silenced, I know. But some will speak out. because some intermediaries have a sense of JUSTICE.

If there is one concept that @Cal__Montgomery has brought home to me like no other, it is the idea that kindness is not what will save the day when it comes to the abuse of disabled people or any marginalised people.

What is needed is a commitment to JUSTICE.

There is no such thing as a 'safe space' or 'safe people'. Everything is always a risk. All relationships are risky. There are issues with every human rights activist and organisation, there are issues with every good therapist and therapy.

I have harmed people, and there are people who dislike me. I collaborate with people who have each other blocked in every space, and I try to take care not to mix the conversations, to respect those boundaries. We don't have to get everyone talking to each other.

We can always do BETTER. I'm helping a chronically ill woman who deserves better healthcare. She's not my friend; I don't have much in common with her. I don't agree with the way she tries to get help. But she deserves life and freedom from pain. #Justice

You don't have to like people to fight for their rights. You don't have to enjoy each other's company. It's about justice, not just about all the feels.

I hardly even use the word 'love' anymore, because that word is so contaminated.

What drives you? Is it a feeling? What will you do when your oxytocin fizzles out, will you still care?

What are your CONVICTIONS?