Hide your dogs, hide your cats, @awscloud account managers!
The biggest cloud cost mistake is always Kubernetes.
"Autoscaling is often not worth the expense of implementing it properly."
There, I said it.
Stop doing this please.
"Move data between AZs once; it costs the same as storing it in S3 for three weeks."
...that meets your requirements, obviously.
"A different company has data that lives in @Splunk, because data always finds its way to Splunk. Imagine that, an expensive story that involves Splunk!"
This is going to result in emails, isn't it.
Now I cite @ben11kehoe while also insulting him by calling him my friend.
Now I talk finance mixed with sarcasm and nobody gets the accent.
"It turns out computers are SUUUUUUUUUPER expensive!"
Surprise your leadership, and they will surprise you in return.
Please.
Tag yourself. I'm not the whale.
"Save money but lose the ability to predict it." Feels like a candidate for "Quinn's Law."
And of course a call to action.
And now @RealGeneKim would (in a normal in-person year) hits me with a broom until I flee.
• • •
Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to
force a refresh
Back up any personal (NOTE: NOT CORPORATE IP!) data on my work laptop whenever I get a context-less "let's talk" message.
Putting all of my corporate expenses on my personal card, then expensing them instead of the other way around to avoid giving them the "well technically this might be embezzlement" stick if they disagree with a decision.
It wants an S3 bucket. Cool. The service has one bucket for ingest, and one for output generally. Which does this form want?
ALWAYS WITH THE QUESTIONS, YOU PEOPLE!
"Encryption of S3 buckets is basically a box check for compliance groups. That said, we at @awscloud are going to mandate it for this service with your own KMS key because the KMS team bribed us for that sweet $1 a month revenue juicer."
So back in 2008-ish, I volunteered as freenode network staff, which I was for the next seven years. This still occasionally surprises people. My nick was, unsurprisingly, "Corey."
I'd been on the network learning for a while, primarily in the postfix and centos channels. (That's how I met @BitIntegrity, whom I later married. To someone else.)
It was nice to have a chance to give back.
There was a lot of fun, a lot of drama... @bequinning and I flew out for annual holiday gatherings in the UK for a number of years.
Eventually I stopped having time to spend on IRC, and focused on other things. Like shitposting here!
In this "welcome back to @awscloud" thread, I'll take new AWS CEO @aselipsky through a whirlwind tour of what AWS has been up to during his time away.
I know his first day was Monday, but the CloudFormation thing that was going to tell me when he got to the lobby was wedged in ROLLBACK_FAILED, so hopefully he was able to at least find the bathroom okay...
As I'm sure @aselipsky remembers, @awscloud prides itself on being misunderstood for long periods of time. It'll sometimes be first to market with something they refine, or late to market with something polished. Their Kubernetes option went for novelty: both late and underdone.