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17 Jun, 4 tweets, 2 min read
WINSTON LOOK INNOCENT TO ME CHRISTOPHER

WHO MEASURES BAGUETTES BY THE FOOT HOW WOULD WINSTON KNOW HOW LONG THE BAGUETTE WAS

ALSO IF THE TAIL IS LIT
YOU MUST ACQUIT

CASE CLOSE
speaking of three foot baguetts
do not forget the baguette pillow exist
i have not forgotten this bread pillow exist a body pillow that is a baguette
potato pillow potato mochi pillow
caroline has the baguette pillow
i am serious

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More from @darth

darth™ Profile picture
17 Jun
triple plays are so fun tbh
4) triple plays
3) inside the park home runs
2) position players pitching
1) dogs at the ballpark day
honorable mention to pitchers hitting home runs
Read 6 tweets
darth™ Profile picture
17 Jun
amaze
not just national truffle treasure hunter nicolas cage
former michelin star restaurant chef nicolas cage who is now national truffle treasure hunter nicolas cage searching for his truffle pig

the layers here
taken 2 poster bacon with nicolas cage
Read 5 tweets
darth™ Profile picture
7 Jun
apple...pls
did apple just announce a free apple VPN
"macOS bigger sur"
Read 4 tweets
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7 Jun
wat
remember when a swarm of ladybugs showed up on weather radar
i do not know what qualifies for 'too many bugs' but 'showing up on weather radar' is probably on the list
Read 4 tweets
darth™ Profile picture
27 May
ted cruz probably would have just eaten it manu
have to admit until this video i had no idea how ginormous those bugs are omfg
i once had a ginormous bug land on my head and i tried to swipe it off but it kind of clung there until i finally knocked it free and then for the next two hours i was convinced it was still there and kept swiping at my head nervously
i am glad no one saw me
Read 4 tweets
darth™ Profile picture
27 May
now i want ice cream tbh
and it is a small thing to be sure in the larger scheme of things
but ice cream is best in a cone
this is just my opinion
fine then lets do a poll
ice cream is best in:
Read 8 tweets

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