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The Mossad: The Social Media Account Profile picture
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26 Jun, 8 tweets, 2 min read
"How was Islamic Jihad summer camp sweetie?"
Hello Muddah, Hello Fatah
Here I am at Camp Jihada
Camp's a very good sensation
At least without this smoke inhalation
I launched rockets with Abdullah
He's not right in the medulla
Me and Mahmoud threw some rubble.
He got trapped in a collapsed tunnel.
We all jump through rings of fire
On our heads are flaming tires
Both my eyebrows completely smoldered
We are training to be child soldiers
I got sand in my new undies
This is thanks to EU funding
Our head counselor's very moody
He makes us sing Itbah Al Yahoodi
(Chorus)
Please don't make me cannon fodder
For your stupid intifada
Please don't leave me in this structure
Slated by IDF for destruction

Please don't make me martyr for the
Cause of killing others
Oh please don't make me stay
Where you're thrown off roofs for being gay
Dearest waldaa, darling amma
I'm right under, the cafeteria
In a tunnel, getting tenser.
I've been caught by IDF sensors
Wait a minute, helter skelter
The Israelis, stuck in shelter
IAF says, they're efficient
Muddafudda I regret this mission

• • •

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More from @TheMossadIL

The Mossad: The Social Media Account Profile picture
23 May
Results of Operation Guardian of the Walls:

We are going to share a report based on an investigation into the 74 named Palestinians that were killed during the course of the operation.

israellycool.com/2021/05/23/rep…
Source (@terrorisminfo)
🧵1/6
It is important to highlight that despite:
- Hamas policy of operating within civilian populations & intentionally endangering civilians of all ages.
- Hamas actively encouraging & in some cases forcing civilians to be human shields

Uninvolved civilian casualties are low.

🧵2/6
In summary:

- Of 74 named deaths as reported by Palestinian media:
- 16 were killed by Hamas rockets
- 30 were Hamas terrorists
- 3 were Palestinian Islamic Jihad terrorists
- 8 were Fatah terrorists
- 4 were related or close to terrorists
- 13 were unknown or uninvolved

🧵3/6
Read 6 tweets
The Mossad: The Social Media Account Profile picture
15 May
Hi. Jew here.
Every thing in that tweet is a lie.

Many rockets hit heavily populated cities including the Tel Aviv area. Israelis and foreign nationals as young as 5 have been killed.
The US didn't "buy" us anything. It shows you have no understanding of how US-Israel Defence agreements work. The Iron Dome was developed here in Israel.
Gaza has "nothing" because Hamas chose to spend all their money on a pipe dream to destroy us, instead of allowing normal lives for their own people.
Read 4 tweets
The Mossad: The Social Media Account Profile picture
14 May
Wir lieben es!
🇮🇱🇦🇹🇪🇺 Image
Líbí se nám to!
🇮🇱🇨🇿 Image
Wir lieben es!
🇮🇱🇩🇪 Image
Read 8 tweets
The Mossad: The Social Media Account Profile picture
20 Apr
We have been getting so many badly translated death threats in the past few days we're thinking of making a dedicated twitter account just to share them all.
I
II
Fire you
Read 6 tweets
The Mossad: The Social Media Account Profile picture
21 Mar
About this time BDS is tweet storming #UnitedAgainstRacism.

They're probably going to use this opportunity to point out that racism exists in Israel as if it doesn't exist anywhere else.

Well, sure it does. Are we trying to recognize it and treat it? We sure hope so.
Sure we can give you graphics disproving the claim that there is no discrimination in health care.
Sure we can show you how Israel vaccinated more Palestinians than the Palestinians through coordinated efforts.
Read 6 tweets
The Mossad: The Social Media Account Profile picture
6 Feb
After attempting to annihilate the Jews in the Middle East by all out war, boycotts, embargoes, stabbings, shootings, suicide bombings, murdering Olympic athletes, hijacking planes, pushing disabled persons off boats, car rammings, kidnappings, launching rockets,
explosive balloons, more stabbings, cultural boycotts, academic boycotts, commercial boycotts, sports boycotts, social media abuse, synagogue massacres, murdering entire families in their sleep, hijacking a bus and going on a shooting spree, mass shootings in schools,
promotion of terror, guaranteed lifetime payment and recognition for Jew murder, erecting monuments in honour of terrorists who murdered Jews, education from birth on moral duty to murder Jews, booby trapping children's toys,
Read 6 tweets

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