Thread by @mykola

I am disabled and I am proud.

It took me a long time to realize that. I was 34 when I learned I was autistic, 35 when I first considered myself disabled. It took a long time to get comfortable with that word.

Ableism in society means we internalize contempt for the disabled.

So many disabled people don’t know they’re disabled, because they feel like normal human beings and they think “disabled” means something other than that. I was in this camp forever too. It gets programmed into us by society.

https://twitter.com/sanau_pnw/status/1411035693850062850

Some ways disability manifests:

Do you struggle with things that others have no problem with?

Are you spending more energy than your family or friends or coworkers to achieve the same outcome?

Are you tired all the time from living at your limits?

Huh.

Do you dread going to certain kinds of places because they’re too loud?

Do you avoid certain things so you don’t have to talk to anyone?

Do you live your life in constant terror of your own emotions seizing control and wreaking havoc?

These are disabilities. It’s fine.

Do you struggle with words? Are you ashamed because you can’t read as fast as other people?

Are numbers just impossible for you to reason about?

Do you stutter?

Do you feel unsafe in your day to day life?

Disability isn’t just wheelchairs and canes.

last point: so, so many people i know with invisible disabilities don’t feel entitled to use the word. It feels appropriative if you’re not obviously physically disabled somehow.

This is actually I think internalized ableism. We only feel comfortable using the word on The Other.

There’s no cutoff, there’s no disability police, and the only thing you’re doing by using the term disabled is wedging the definition open for more people to embrace their struggling selves. It’s a good thing. Embrace it!

More ways you might be disabled and not know it:

- you can’t fall asleep/wake up at “normal” times.

- you frequently find that people are upset with you after you speak, without knowing why.

- no matter how hard you try you can’t keep up with household chores.

(Manifestations of disability, continued)

You may have delayed audio processing - do you say “what?” a lot, only to catch up as they repeat themselves?

Try watching tv with subtitles, it’ll change your life.

Attention-related disability is real.

We talk a lot about adhd but honestly anyone who finds their mind wandering a lot, who can’t focus on tasks, who is subject to painful intrusive thoughts etc is dealing with a layer of struggle most people don’t have. That’s disability. Ok!

If you got Covid over a month ago and you still don’t feel recovered, REST! You have #longcovid and it could turn into ME/CFS. These are serious disabilities, not something to gloss over or push through.

If you aren’t facing that squarely you risk pushing yourself and suffering.

Sometimes you’ll hear people say stuff like “I’m autistic but I’m not disabled.”

This was me, at first.

In my humble opinion, this is 100% internalized ableism. What you’re saying is “I’m autistic but I’m still human”.

(This isn’t a callout post of autistics who don’t use the term disabled — it’s a call-in post for anyone who hasn’t worked through this stuff yet. It’s not your fault, society programs all of us.)

The real question is: why do we all grow up feeling like “disabled” means anything other than “fully human with some support needs”?

Why do people feel the need to defend their humanity by downplaying their disability?

It’s a false dichotomy! Blow it up!