Thread by @GeorgePointon_

I asked my year 1 classes 'What do parents do while kids are at school?'
Here is my analysis;
A THREAD

Alice - 'Go shopping and drink coffee'

I can see this in Alice's future. She'd be such a fun shopping and coffee partner. Funny. Lovable. Empathetic. I bet she'd order a caramel spiced latte and ask you about how your mum getting on her with new hip. Alice is all ears for you.

Katie - 'Write forms and use pens'

Life can often feel like a monotonous drag. Get up. Go to work. Sleep. Repeat untill dead. Katie's family run a local business. Prehaps she sees her family working lots. But running a business you love with the people you love. It's never work

Jack - 'Wait in the car'

Like an A-list celebrity, Jack believes that his driver is permanently waiting in the car park. This is jack's world. We are just the faceless droogs that serve our mighty leader. Parents just sit and wait like a Megabus driver outside Alton Towers.

Toby - 'Eat the nice food'

In the Toby household. Good crisps. Chocolate. Sweets. It's all kept ontop of the fridge. Out of reach. Massive conspiracy theories flying about. Are they even up there? Do parents just eat it and pretend it's there? Don't worry Toby. They're up there

Emma - 'They go to work for us'

You'll often hear older generations say "Kids have no respect". Well, start talking to better kids. Emma is understanding and appreciates all that her parents do. Even at such a young age, that is an amazing amount of empathy to have. Big up Emma

Mikey - 'Punches the sink'

Time for another round of "What's going on in Mikey's head?" This week. Sink punching...I dived in deeper. His Dad is a plumber and he also (apparently) works as the Hulk part-time. Turns out he fixes broken sinks. And punches the old ones. For fun.

Ravi - 'Spend time together'

It's amazing the power of spending time. It's your most valuable possession. Ravi knows the truth. Look at yourself and think 'Do I dedicate enough time to my partner?'. One day you'll look back and wish you did. So take that chance now. Thanks Ravi.

Rosie - 'Try to get money'

This capitalist society we've created sees money become the centre of our universe. She is fully aware we are just rats. Stuck in cages, purchasing the next piece of IKEA furniture to give our life meaning. Rosie isn't a rat. She's an eagle. Fly free.

Wendy - 'Pretend to do things'

When you're a child your parents are like Gods. My dad once told me a man won 3 gold medals at the Olympic swimming. Wearing jeans. I just believed that. For years. Parents lie. They're not perfect and Wendy knows it. Stay on your toes mum and dad

Ben - 'They shower'

Please can you get your mind out of the gutter for one second. This is not a Carry On film. He's simply pointing out what they do! Some of you need to take a look at yourselves. Appalling behaviour. His Dad does often come in very chipper though. Coincidence?

Susanna - 'I don't know. I'm at school'

Some of these kids are very ready for the summer holidays now. I can tell they're so sick of my nonsense. Susanna didn't even bother. She knows how cheeky that answer is. But she delivered it with great comedic timing so I'll let her off.

END OF THREAD

Id like to end with a motivational quote from a pupil;

"You don't know if you have cereal untill you look in the box"