Don't mind me, just sitting here thinking about how angry flatmates and family used to get at me for leaving kitchen cabinet doors open, when it turns out it's related to my ADHD. They always made me feel super inconsiderate even though I tried SO hard to remember.
I'm not saying that ADHD is a get out of jail free card for annoying your flatmates, but it's also not cool to moralise an ADHDer's behavior based on assumptions e.g. interpreting someone leaving kitchen cabinet doors open as them not respecting or caring about the shared space.
I'd love for people with ADHDers in their lives to think critically about what's important and why. If ur consistently hitting your head on cabinet doors or some equivalent, I get the frustration. But if it's bc of what it represents, are u sure it means what you think it means?
Are there other ways this person is showing care to you, or the space they share with you? What makes you think they're forgetting to do "x" because they don't respect you? If your answer is "if they cared, they'd do it", you have a fundamental misunderstanding of ADHD.
If you truly hate it when people leave cabinet doors open or some other thing, that's fine! If you tell me I'm inconsiderate for doing so...well, we probably aren't compatible. I'm done letting people make me feel careless or disrespectful for things I can't change about myself.
I wish people would stop projecting intent onto behavior where there is none. But mostly I'm now intentional about rejecting the biased narratives people place onto me. I refuse to see myself as careless when I know I'm not, just bc ableism says that's the logical explanation.
• • •
Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to
force a refresh
