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12 Sep, 4 tweets, 1 min read
I bet if everyone chipped in we could get it done in one.
The main purpose of the Biritish monarchy today is to play a great cosmic joke on Charles, and let's face it, that's a great purpose. This important work must continue. But no reason to keep it going after the universe delivers its punch line.
You have to wonder how many British journalists have died of old age with pre-written obituaries of Elizabeth II in their desk drawer. And I hope their heirs all sent her a copy; that's got to be a satisfying feeling if you're Liz.
Elizabeth II is single now and should use the opportunity to unify the kingdom with another monarchy. What would be the best-case royal marriage? A House of Windsor-Saud, in addition to being age-appropriate, would really stick it to the EU, but I welcome other suggestions.

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15 Sep
Nobody seems to be running the saner version of this headline, which is that our top military leader conspired with a foreign power outside the civilian chain of command.
This is closer to treason (which is really narrowly defined in our constitution) than anything Trump ever did.
If you're worried the President is going to go full loco, maybe call Congress instead of your buddy in the PLA
Read 8 tweets
Pinboard Profile picture
15 Sep
The California recall may be the emblematic election of our time—you get to choose whether to keep the dismal status quo or climb into a clown car.
People discount the fact that it's a lot more fun in the clown car.
I'd also love to see the results of an election where there's no question on the ballot, you can just pick YES or NO. They should run one to calibrate these recalls.
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14 Sep
New iPhone is pretty hefty
Today Apple is one step closer to achieving its dream of a dongle with dongles. This one lets you shave while watching YouTube
These iPads look like the color selection you get with modern cars. For some reason every auto sold these days is only available in five subdued colors, two of which are grey.
Read 23 tweets
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13 Sep
Why does the Sound of Music have brighter and more vivid colors than any modern comic book movie? And will anyone making these things have the courage to depart from the brown/orange/teal color scheme? Is there some modern color balance codicil to the Hays Code I'm not aware of?
George Lucas needs to re-issue the original Star Wars movies at 48 frames per second with modern digital color correction. And auto-tune that Mos Eisley Cantina scene!
The situation with digital cinematography reminds me of how synthesizers and digital effects ate music for about fifteen years before they were brought under control. The world did not need a Dylan song with gated reverb, but we got like four albums of them.
Read 4 tweets
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11 Sep
I don't know how it struck other people, but the word "homeland" entering American politics in late 2001 was my first real taste of American nativism, which would of course grow to dominate our politics in both parties. I'd never been uneasy before that about being foreign born.
There were other moments like this—the incredulity at watching people chant "USA! USA!" at the Republican National Convention in 2002, then at the DNC in 2016. The return of denaturalization. But it was "Homeland" (in a country where 15% are immigrants) that started it all.
Like, I'm sorry, but the actual homeland does not have such shitty ham.
Read 4 tweets
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8 Sep
This thread about how the SEC is being mean to the company trying to hook cryptocurrency scams into the real economy creates an acute crisis for nanoluthiers, who are still decades away from being able to build an atomic scale violin and thought they had more time
Coinbase really is the Sinn Derp of imaginary money, the ostentatiously law-abiding arm of a fundamentally criminal enterprise. Their goal is to enable the criminality at scale by creating a legal way to hook grandma's pension fund into Buttcoin derivatives
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