Jokes aside, the actual implication of "Meat's back on the menu, boys!" is that Hobbits know what a menu is, not Orcs, as they're the ones telling the story.
Orcs were created for military action and presumably wouldn't have bothered with tables, as that's too much resources away from their singular purpose, so the equivalent phrase wouldn't be "back on the table" but presumably some expression that only makes literal sense to orcs.
And so Frodo, when he added the adventures of the Fellowship to Bilbo's memoirs, translated it to an idiom that would have been familiar to his assumed audience of other Hobbits.
It's also possible that Ugluk said nothing that was intelligible to Merry and Pippin, who later attempted to convey to Frodo what they had witnessed based on their understanding of what was going on.
"And the big one was all like, 'Looks like meat is back on the menu, boys!' and they all ate the other orc."

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More from @AlexandraErin

20 Sep
This, and also the cities exist, by and large, because we *need* a city to be there, for shipping routes and access to resources. It's like blaming people for having "shitty jobs". The alternative is those jobs don't get done.
"Why do they keep rebuilding New Orleans? Why not pick somewhere without hurricanes?"

You mean, why don't they pick up *the harbor* and move it inland? We should just put all our shipping ports in the mountains and then it doesn't matter if sea levels rise. Boom, I solved it.
The fact that New Orleans is people's homes and history and culture cannot be overlooked, but also, it's not a coincidence that people happened to settle down where our big navigable river meets the sea.
Read 6 tweets
20 Sep
Yes, this.

And the thing is that as a writer I don't think this is terrible, or fully avoidable.

Like, if the audience could suddenly see directly into the wings at a stage play, it would also change things quite a bit.
Fiction writers will never be able to create a fully realized, fully functional, living and breathing and completely detailed world for the same reason that cartographers don't build planets. The best you can do is be aware of where the spackle is and don't make it load-bearing.
So much this. "No-Maj" is the single most tweely British thing in the books.
Read 25 tweets
20 Sep
LRT: The number of people who read Jay Kay's books and concluded that the purebloods must have a point about blood purity meaning *something* or it wouldn't have been in the book has changed how I think about depictions of evil in my work.
I.e., if you're going to have a tropey allegory for some real-world evil, it's not enough to just attach it to The Very Obviously Bad Guys and expect that everyone will get the point that the belief is foolish and wrong in the world of the story.
In small and large ways, the Wizarding World's obsession with blood purity (and "the right sorts of families" and all the connected ideas) matches with and maps onto widespread beliefs and prejudices in the real world.
Read 15 tweets
19 Sep
I unironically think that arms back or folded in front of them would be the answer. A centaur's arms would not meaningfully contribute to balance and I don't think they could easily perform a reciprocal motion to the gallop anyway. Best to just keep them out of the way.
I am not an expert on running, galloping, centaurs, balance, momentum, or balance so I could be wrong here. I think streamlined out of the way would be the best answer, but when charging into battle... well, real horses have the wind resistance of a cavalry officer's arms, too.
Read 6 tweets
19 Sep
Just saw an antivaxer say that everybody who died of covid was on their death bed. With a few exceptions (like that person who fell over dead on a ladder), he's not wrong. When you're in bed and dying of covid, the bed you're in is your deathbed.
And I know I'm being glib here, but the thing is, from the beginning, absolute spoon drawers on here have been going "Why not just isolate the vulnerable instead of requiring HEALTHY people to change?" as though "the vulnerable" is a distinct class. It's not.
And the idea that a death bed is some special thing in and of itself that some people are on, so you don't have to worry about covid until you're on your death bed... you don't know if it's your death bed or not. No one does until you die.
Read 4 tweets
19 Sep
Somewhere between 35,000 and 50,000. Felt amazing, 5/0 stars, would not recommend.
I've actually done this multiple times, always with either fetish fiction that is really specific to the point of incomprehensible absurdity or unworkably complex drafts for a tabletop roleplaying game.
It's basically a matter of being hyperfixated on getting something I've been thinking about a lot for a long time out of my head. Doing that sparks more ideas, I hyperfixate, and my brain won't quiet down long enough for me to feel tired or sleep.
Read 10 tweets

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