Thread by @imaracingmom

@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 Sorry, well not really sorry! Another thread is coming up.

Thank-you, Miles, for recognizing I'm trying to be reasonable in my conversations about topics really important to me. Things like THR, kindness, and respect.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 Everyone of you in this conversation has shown me respect. I appreciate that!!!

What breaks my heart is that some of you have not shown others the level of respect you've shown me. I am no more/less deserving of that than anyone else.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 Right vs Wrong.
Now you're speaking to my autistic brain. This battle is something I know 24/7. It has been one of the biggest obstacles in my life. It has cost me relationships with family members and has lost me many friends over the years.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 It is like I have 2 rubber stamps and 1 of them has to be used on everything I said/did. It is how I interpreted everything in my life. It's either Right, or it's Wrong. In my world, there is no in between. I hate with a passion being wrong.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 For years, I did everything in my power to prove I wasn't wrong. 1st, I back up the evidence truck. I'll throw 10,000 studies at you. I throw in articles and top it off with people who agree with me. I'll try to over power you with my rightness.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 If that doesn't work, I'll kick you in the nuts and cut you off at the knees. I will destroy you, discredit you, and take pleasure in making you cry. This is the person I was my whole life. A big hearted lug with a forked tongue. I was always extremes. Kind or mean.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 For 7 years now, I've advocated for tobacco harm reduction. I've "done my research", I've experienced it first hand, I eat-sleep-breath trying to save the lives of people who smoke. Just like many of you.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 How is it, that no one'ss listening to us? Why do less people believe in the miracle these products are vs a few years ago? Sure, there's a well funded/organized anti campaign out there, but why are we going backwards when we speak the truth?
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 I had to take a long hard look at myself. If what I've always done isn't working, then maybe I'm part of the problem. What if I thought I was doing it right when I've been doing it wrong all along? This about short circuited my right / wrong brain.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 The thought of being wrong is so repulsive to me, the revelation that I might be doing things wrong manifested itself into a migraine that lasted for 6 days. I didn't sleep for more than a few minutes at a time. My brain was on firet!
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 That's when it started to sink in there's more than 1 kind of right. That I could be doing something for the right reason, but going about achieving my goal the wrong way. I could be both right and wrong at the same time.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 12/ This led to trying to figure out how to rewire my brain. Trying to learn a new way of communicating. Learning to control the impulse to back up the evidence truck. And learning how to discuss, not fight.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 I've been stigmatized for many things in my lifetime. I hate it. And yet, when dealing with someone who's mind I was trying to change, I learned that I stigmatize them all the time. I call them names, I swear at them. I wage a full on attack!!!
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 It has taken reading a wonderful book (The Righteous Mind), plus watching a lot of videos, reading things online, and listening to podcasts to learn why it's so hard to change minds AND to learn at better ways of communicating.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 I'm really proud that some of you have noticed less #CrankyOldBroad and see a kinder, gentler, more respectful new Skip. It has been extremely challenging to get here, and sometimes I forget and go back to my old ways.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 I had to put myself in other people's shoes. How do I feel when I'm attacked, not heard, swore at, or called derogatory names? I go on the defense. I start swinging back. I'm not going to absorb any info someone is trying to share with me. I'm not going to respect them.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 And I'm certainly not going to believe or trust them. They will never change my mind!!!!

I used to think that people who think different than me were my enemy. Now I steal a quote from I don't remember who. Those people are a friend I haven't made yet.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 Looking at this conversation that has been going on and off for 3 days, I see many people who aren't going to change their minds today. I see some folks who aren't willing to accept that. What if part of what both sides said is right and part is wrong?
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 There can be both not enough research while there is compelling research. And that's true for both sides of the debate for THR. Each of us can read the same research and not come to the same level of belief or disbelief.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 What I think we all need to remember is that most of us aren't going to change our minds on anything in an instant. All we can do is plant seeds and see if they grow. But planting seeds isn't enough.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 If we want to plant seeds that stand even a minute chance of germinating and growing. We have to plant it in fertile soil. That means we're respectful, kind, confident ambassadors of what we're representing.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 That means no matter how important something is to us, how right we think we are, or how frustrated we get, we keep our best foot forward. We check our attitude at the door and we use our words carefully.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 There is no room for name calling, swearing, and personal attacks in a respectful conversation. I don't care if somebody else did it. Lead by example, be the bigger person. Show you are a credible representative for what your advocating for.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 We are on social media. Not only was this 3 day long fight between the people involved, it is available to the world. Who knows who you might influence in the future with what was said here. Were the words exchanged here something you want others to base their decisions on?
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 If I was the "voice of reason" and a voice worth listening to, I would have thought the things I said in other parts of this conversation would have made people on both sides step back and think about what was being said.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 In my opinion, no matter what side you're on, everyone needs to do better than this if they want to be a voice that others will listen to.

In my right vs wrong world, it's never going to be right again to treat people in a nasty way just because I don't agree with them.
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@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 It's been a painful lesson to learn and I'm still learning. My goal everyday is to do better than the day before. I have a lot to say (in case you can't tell), and I want to treat people the right way, so maybe they'll listen to me.
27 ~ end of rant.

@mrmiley @AnastasiosMakr4 @ChaunceyGardner @rphallisey845 @EdwardHubert4 @ravin187 @panthernoster @jkelovuori @KulikovUNIATF @VapingTo @ParentsvsVape @DougBettcher @AshOrg @Vinayakmprasad @vicbranch @healthaustralia @NiliMajumder @RichardOsborne4 @KremlinKW @ZachEvans79 Please unroll @threadreaderapp