1. With #Annie back in the zeitgeist where it belongs (ty #AnnieLive), I thought I'd repost my magnum opus, my Annie sequel mega-thread, Annie Get Your Gun: A Tale of Bloody Vengeance. But half of it is gone?
So I went on a zhuzhing spree.
I give you:
Annie Get Your Gun: Redux
2.
The prison gates open & Agatha Hannigan steps out into the rain. She squints into the distance before turning & making her way to the bus stop.
Perched on the hood of her car, watching, waiting, Molly smiles.
"Annie," she says to the redheaded driver, "Get your gun."
3. Annie tosses her cigarette out the window and grins as the ignition roars to life.
She says nothing, of course. Annie lost her voice to nodes years ago.
4. "We better get to Zaddy's," Molly says as she plugs Warbucks Manor into the GPS.
"The sun will come out tomorrow, but bitch..."
She dons her aviators.
"It's today."
5. Zaddy Warbucks greets them at the door, kissing Annie on the cheek, and nodding at Molly. He knows she still resents him for not adopting her ex, Pepper.
"Zaddy Warbucks." she says uneasily. She still hasn't gotten used to his sleeves of gruesome tattoos or the eyepatch.
6. "Come, she's waiting for you."
They make their way past the assembly lines where maids and butlers wrap weapons in towels and load them onto "Bundles Laundry Delivery" trucks.
Molly looks for Mr. Bundles before she remembers that he shot his profits up his arm last summer.
7. A cacophony of fierce barking brings Molly back to reality. Shaggy dogs rattle their cages, snarling as she walks by.
"A good litter of Sandies this year," Zaddy mutters. "Vicious."
8. When they enter Grace's office, she stands with her back to them, staring out the window.
"Annie," she says without turning. "Annie's friend."
Molly swallows her retort. "Hannigan's out," she says.
The desk chair spins around revealing a smirking Hannigan. "She knows."
9. There's a crash as Annie leaps across the desk, going for Hannigan's throat, but Zaddy manages to restrain her.
"You know this is the only way!" Grace shouts. "Rooster and Lily's gang have been running things for far too long. She's the only one who knows their weaknesses."
10. "Grace is right," Zaddy says. Annie twists out of his grip and goes to Molly's side. "Hannigan's the only one who can get us access to Easy Street."
"And this time, when I get there," Hannigan sneers, "I'll stay."
11. "Take. Us. To. Rooster," Molly says through gritted teeth.
Hannigan laughs. "First, you have to say it."
Annie throws Molly a pleading look, silently imploring her to stay quiet. But whatever pride Molly had died in that orphanage over 20 years ago.
Listen. It took me years to realize I stopped auditioning for musical theater not bc I was lazy, but bc I was in pain. It wasn’t the rejection—it was walking into a room & being made to feel like your body was unreasonable, that by showing up you were wasting everyone’s time.
It was standing in a row with 30 girls in leotards and LaDucas and watching the casting director’s eyes skip over you as he scanned the line, or mindlessly push your headshot to the rejection pile with without even looking at you long enough to see your face.
It was the urge to walk up to the only other big girl in the holding room & sit in silent camaraderie, while secretly hating she was there. There were only so many “old lady” (or “fat friend” or “clueless teen” or “sassy villain”) roles to go around and they’d never cast you both
PRINCE: I love snuggling with you in bed, babe, cuddling after a long day of Pricing, playing footsie with your five... evenly spaced toes...YOU’RE NOT MY WIFE!!
:Cinderella enters:
CINDERELLA: Ugh, Fairy Godmother you need to stop.
My name’s Peggy Schuyler & this is the first time I’ve ever started a sentence that isn’t just a continuation of what my sisters are already saying! I have so much to say I could burst!
Um.
My dress is yellow.
Mother says that she doesn’t remember if I was born or just followed Eliza in off the street one day. Angelica says Mother just doesn’t remember bc the day I was born she spent 72 excruciating hrs inhaling the ladunum-soaked birthing cloth that was also her only menstrual rag.
Anyway, I’m off to another night of being dragged around allyways. I’m sure we’ll be mugged again. Yelling “WE ARE IMPOVERISHED” never seems to stop thieves. Burr will probably watch from the shadows. He always describes what’s happening but he has never once helped.
💛
P. Schuy