In a devastated democracy—where an invisible virus and an in-your-face monster are running riot—newspapers are doing their bit to elevate the mood. As #NewYear2022 dawns, there is plenty of pop advice on offer on how to navigate zindagi’s “chunautis”. (1/4)
2️⃣ @DainikBhaskar has a 10-step guide on how to “unlock happiness”. Happily lifted from Danish writer Aksel Sandemoss’s ‘Jante’s Law’, the newspaper lists the 10 commandments that have made Finland the world’s happiest nation, year after year: tinyurl.com/yc3xka39 (2/4)
3️⃣ @AmarUjalaNews reads no different from an inane @PMOIndia speech. Its 5 steps to happiness is a boilerplate 🙏 bullshit message 🙏 forwarded by WhatsApp uncles: family first, stay happy, take care of your health, invest in a new skill, read good news. (3/4)
4️⃣ The Kannada daily #VishwaVani has 22 desktop thoughts, and 29 life lessons, on its front page. “Respect yourself,” says editor @VishweshwarBhat, mirroring the Jewish scholar Hillel the Elder’s advice: “If I am not for myself, who will be for me?” Happy new you. (4/4)

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More from @churumuri

1 Jan
All very easy to pile on the @IndianExpress which won’t influence a single vote. Three large Hindi newspapers, with 200-300 times more circulation in #UttarPradesh, carried the same “offending” advertisement. What about them? @JagranNews @AmarUjalaNews @Live_Hindustan
2️⃣ Beyond the fact-free content of #UttarPradesh ads, the real issue is the vomit-inducing splurge of taxpayers’ money to capture media. In just the 31 days of December, sangh mouthpiece ‘Dainik Jagran’ received 63 ads; ‘Amar Ujala’ 58; ‘Hindustan’ 37. #SochInaamdaarKaamDumdaar
3️⃣ Add advertorials, partnerships, events, slanted news (prepaid and postpaid) and puff pieces intended to massage the ego and secure more, and the obnoxious waste of public money by the @myogiadityanath government to buy up media becomes clear. #SochImaandaarKaamDumdaar
Read 6 tweets
29 Dec 21
When Rs 2,840,000,000—i.e. Rs 284 crore—is seized from one businessman’s house in the country’s biggest ever tax haul, can there be any confusion on who he is, and whose money it is? In “No.1 state” #UttarPradesh, anything is possible. A thread. #PiyushJain #ShikharPanMasala
2️⃣ Prime minister @narendramodi and UP chief minister @myogiadityanath blithely insinuate that the businessman #PiyushJain was a Samajwadi Party man—and that he was hoarding the cash for SP, the BJP’s arch rival, for use in the upcoming state election. #ShikharPanMasala
3️⃣ To be fair, when news of the raids in #Kanpur and #Kannauj was leaked on the night of December 24, Hindi newspapers @amarujala and @DainikBhaskar were quick to link #PiyushJain with ‘Samajwadi Itr’, a perfume developed for SP. Surprisingly, @JagranNews was more circumspect.
Read 11 tweets
27 Dec 21
The Monday morning thrum of a magnificent metropolis. #Chennai at #Saidapet. 7.42 am.
Two hours later. Monday morning rush hour. #Chennai at #Saidapet. 9.42 am.
Monday evening rush back home. #Chennai at #Saidapet. 6.42 pm.
Read 4 tweets
22 Sep 21
The amazing rise—and the even more amazing fall—of #Zee founder @subhashchandra, the Haryanvi rice supplier who turned India’s first satellite TV broadcaster into a rabid “fabricator of consent” for the great cause, bit off more than his due, and found himself abandoned. (1/9)
January 2016: Narendra Modi launches @subhashchandra’s candid biography ‘The Z Factor: My Journey As The Wrong Man at the Right Time’ at the PM’s official 7, Race Course Road residence, in the presence of three cabinet ministers: tinyurl.com/96praj3s (2/9)
June 2016: “Independent” candidate @subhashchandra elected to Rajya Sabha with BJP support from Haryana, after 14 Congress votes are rejected. 12 of the Congress votes were declared invalid due to use of “wrong type of ink”. (3/9) tinyurl.com/nce99f74
Read 9 tweets
8 Apr 21
“The documents that make India and France tremble”: Annotating the #RafalePapers unearthed by the French website @Mediapart on the € 7.8 billion “government-to-government” jet deal. @yphilippin (1/6)
Middleman Sushen Gupta, a US citizen, knew @arunjaitley would be replaced as India’s defence minister, months before the change took place in November 2014. (2/6) #RafalePapers
Enforcement Directorate (ED) found that Sushen Gupta, arrested in the Agusta-Westland VVIP chopper deal, “received kickbacks” to influence “other defence deals” too. (3/6) #RafalePapers
Read 6 tweets
7 Mar 21
Invoking Barack Obama and Queen Elizabeth, six Karnataka ministers have obtained a pre-publication gag order against—believe it or not—the “Editor-in-Chief” of @WhatsApp and 67 others to protect what little is left of their sordid reputations. (1/2) @mla_sudhakar ImageImageImageImage
Before the 2019 elections, Mysore MP Pratap Simha and Bangalore South BJP candidate Tejasvi Surya took out an identical ex-parte injunction against 49 media houses, after allegations of sexual misconduct began doing the rounds on social media. (2/2)
churumuri.blog/2019/04/17/pra…
“By a process of deep fake, using artificial intelligence, videos of @BarackObama and Queen Elizabeth have been morphed”: Karnataka BJP ministers desist from throwing in two other buzzwords that dot every scandal in IT City: dark web and block chain. @mla_sudhakar @BSBommai Image
Read 5 tweets

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