Thread by @dklineii

A human approach to employee feedback that will inspire your team🧵

In 10 years at Bridgewater, I regularly gave feedback most would consider harsh.

Doing that well takes trust and care.

Sadly, leaders often give feedback that does more harm than good.

That doesn’t have to be you.

1/ Why give feedback?

To inspire the change needed to improve the outcome.

- The goal is NOT to get people to conform.

- The goal is NOT to get things off your chest.

- The goal is NOT to force them do it your way.

If outcomes don't improve, your feedback didn't work.

2/ How do you inspire change?

If you have ever been inspired by someone to grow, you know the formula:

GROWTH = TRUST + CLARITY + PRACTICALITY

Trust -> You truly believe they have your best interests in mind

Clarity -> You understand the feedback in your terms, not theirs

Practicality -> You can take immediate, corrective action

3/ How do I build trust?

- Be vulnerable with your own faults; normalize weaknesses since we all have them

- Set clear expectations upfront - your version of success and their version should be reconciled early

- Relentlessly highlight and praise what people do well

Why focus on positives?

First, it addresses your negative skew as a manager. And human:

"The brain is like Velcro for negative experiences, but Teflon for positive ones" - Rick Hansen

Second, we grow bigger & faster from our strengths than our weaknesses.

Shouldn't my team want feedback?

Leaders like @RayDalio & @simonsinek both attribute their success to craving negative feedback.

The key part of that sentence: they crave it.

Gamechanger if your team comes to crave it, but unlikely that's your starting point.

Start slow.

4/ Set expectations upfront

Biggest mistake I see managers making?

Not investing in a shared understanding of what good looks like.

And it's not just goals.

It's a picture of HOW those goals get accomplished.

Done well, feedback is just a comparison to that shared picture.

5/ Making feedback clear

Positive or negative, now you need to communicate clearly.

Start with what which conversation you're having.

I like @joulee's framework:

Task -> specific execution

Behavior -> emerging patterns

Performance -> overall trajectory vs expectations

6/ What's the right mix?

Positive vs Negative -> 3:1

Type:

- Task -> Daily but no less than weekly
- Behavior -> Cover in a 1:1 mtg 1x/month
- Performance -> No less than 2x no more than 4x/year

Tip: Frequent minor feedback relieves pressure, preventing explosive buildups.

7/ What's the right forum?

As a leader, you need to build a picture of your people.

And know what gets the most from them.

- Modest? Praise in private.
- Need time to digest? Send an email.
- Stubborn? Have trusted others weigh in.
- Entrenched? Work through it with the team.

8/ Messaging matters

- No kitchen sink. We can only process so much.

- Be specific with relevant examples.

- Use Feeling, Behavior, Impact from @KristenHadeed

"I felt <feeling> when you <behavior>. The <impact>."

- Don't dictate how they correct. Do confirm that they agree.

9/ Feedback on feedback

How can you figure out if it resonates?

Ask:

- Does this match you picture / make sense to you?

- What is your path forward / next steps?

Watch out for: caveats, "buts" and detail obsession

Reset back to the expectations you set upfront if need be.

10/ Two underutilized tactics:

Start with a question.

- "How do you think the presentation went?"

- "What is the key message you think came through in your memo?"

They usually know.

And it helpfully flips the dynamic -> They critique, you coach.

Ask why?

Hidden behind suboptimal performance is a misalignment:

- values
- motivations
- expectations
- understanding

"Why" will surface the highest leverage disagreement.

https://twitter.com/dklineii/status/1466406715318931467

12/ Expert Feedback Advice:

Radical Candor (@kimballscott)

Key Tension:

Care Personally + Challenge Directly

https://twitter.com/kimballscott/status/1410707132572266501

Radical Truth (@raydalio)

Key Tension:

Evaluate accurately, not kindly + Put compliments & criticisms in perspective

https://twitter.com/raydalio/status/1319647559158165509

13/ Feedback myths

Sandwich feedback between compliments
- Most condescending advice ever.
- Be direct. These are pros, treat them as such.

Problems & excellence are on a continuum
- Solving problems restores order.
- Excellence emerges from strength.
- Positive >> Critical.

14/ Not a manager?

These same tactics work for being a good teammate.

Or perhaps you're thinking about your boss.

We have a question in our house: Helpful or hurtful?

If your boss is too often the latter:

https://twitter.com/choo_ek/status/1163832735233794048

15/ Final thoughts

Feedback is a gift.

Ironically, it's best received by those with a clear picture of themselves.

https://twitter.com/joulee/status/1387428615151755269

But here's a secret:

Acknowledge and deal with your weaknesses.

That way, no one can use them against you.

The Eminem Method (@anthonyonesto) linkedin.com/pulse/eminem-m…

TL/DR

- Give feedback to inspire change
- Build trust & safety first
- Positive >> negative
- Set clear expectations
- Be intentional with mix, message & medium
- Communicate clearly
- Confirm understanding
- Use questions
- Feedback is a gift
- Owning it a superpower

Want to go deeper?

60% of new mangers fail in the 1st 18 months.

Why?

They don't get trained in the tactics they need to thrive.

Feedback & Development is just one module we're going deep on in my New Manager Accelerator course.

Join us?
skillscouter.com/management-acc…