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gaia

@gaialect

Jan 23

if you struggle to maintain boundaries w/ ppl you care about:

• you’re hurting yourself by doing the same things & hoping for a different result
• your ability to understand/forgive is your superpower but also your greatest weakness
• if they expect it, they don’t respect it

i’ll elaborate 🌷 it’s a type of madness to continue doing the same things & expect a different result. when caught in a vicious cycle, the probability of something different being the outcome is slim to none. a part of you knows this but is too forgiving to change your ways.

some of you may also not realize how often you are “doing the same things” & not seeing the results you desire because once you’re in a cycle for a bit… it feels… normal. the toxicity. the lack of reciprocity. the neglect you feel. which is an extremely sad realization. 😔

Read 17 tweets

gaia

@gaialect

Jan 23

you don’t need anybody. it may feel that way right now. it may all feel intimidating right now but trust me. the person you need most is staring back at you in that mirror every morning you get up and every night before you sleep. don’t put them on the back burner for nobody.

don’t get this confused w toxic hyper-independence. it’s just the truth of the matter. yes it’s nice to have people in your life, specifically, the ones that want to be there. but please don’t ever convince yourself that without someone’s presence you cannot go on. it’s not true.

re-write your story. pay attention to what you’re telling yourself vs what your intrusive thoughts are trying to convince you of. were they important to you? yes sure. did you have a connection? yea sure. are they the end all be all when it comes to your happiness? absolutely not

Read 6 tweets

gaia

@gaialect

Jan 22

one of the worst things is when you stand up for yourself or communicate in an extremely direct way and there go an insecure mf who lacks self awareness trying to paint you as the villain. they try to guilt you and make you question yourself. it’s very ugly. you had every right.

they’re calling you immature and hot headed yet they pushed you to this point. yet they don’t even possess the maturity to respond just as directly. instead? they’re taking shots at your personality or “character” as if they’re better than you. 😂 it’s pathetic honestly.

instead of directly responding to your statement they’re grasping for straws, trying to make you feel insecure for standing your ground. funny. yeah i see thru it. this is why i say, put in the work to fully know & accept yourself. bc once you do, NO ONE can tell you who you are.

Read 4 tweets

gaia

@gaialect

Jan 18

for each person it’s different but for me personally, my lack of boundary setting in the past stemmed from a fear of being disliked essentially. there was an awesome tweet i saw saying the fear of setting boundaries was fear of the dynamic changing & that’s a great way to put it.

when i find it, i’ll link it below. but yeah for me, it was very “wow i want to say something but maybe i’m overreacting. i don’t want this person to think i’m too sensitive or stop giving me this attention”. i enjoyed their attention more than my inner peace or maybe…

at the time i did not realize how much a lack of boundaries could unsettle and disturb my inner peace… because now i’m aware of it & setting boundaries has become as easy as breathing. before… i must’ve been real insecure, lonely, codependent to let all that shit fly honestly.

Read 10 tweets

gaia

@gaialect

Oct 9, 2021

tw // abuse
this woman who was physically abused by her partner shared her story. she expressed how women from age 21-24 are most likely to find themselves in physically abusive relationships. she explained how her partner at the time lovebombed her.

she mentioned how he was innocent looking, how he treated her so great in the beginning, like no one had before. paid attention to her like no one had. supported every though, idea and dream she had. was truly the perfect person. was very much so devoted to everything about her.

it went on for quite awhile like this. then the next thing on his agenda (same for most abusers) is to isolate the victim from their loved ones. so he mentioned moving to another state. she really loved him and figured okay we can do that.

Read 12 tweets

gaia

@gaialect

Oct 7, 2021

i love the feeling of growing in love. there’s always so much to learn about a person. on their good days & their bad. approaching each obstacle together as a team instead of apart makes it all so worth while.

to find someone that accepts you as you are so openly & gracefully while also giving you the room & space to make human mistakes & grow from them. if you have a friend or lover like this, please do not take them for granted. i believe it’s so rare to find such unconditional love.

so much beauty and warmth radiates from a heart that is ready to love you the way no one else has. so much patience goes into allowing the one you care about have human moments. those moments where they can’t show up for you because they’re struggling to show up for themselves.

Read 8 tweets

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